CFN SpanGran has landed thread #8

[WhatIsThisWatt]

Hi guys! Wow I've just had a chance to come back on and noticed the last thread is full already?!

There also seems to be loads of people saying they're over it and don't believe me. That's fine, I'm not going to get into an argument with anyone. I had no idea that I would get so many responses when I initially asked for advice on this situation, however, they have really cheered me up through what has been a really crappy few days at points. Thanks all.

Sorry if ive pissed people off.

Anyway my Grandma has landed at the airport and should be with me in a couple of hours. It's not even that far away (she likes to take her time)

Very short summary time:

OP discovers next door neighbours have knocked out window in listed building and replaced with UPVC patio doors leading directly into her garden.

Contacts LA planning department who issue STOP notice.

Now in the hands of the officials.

Looks to Mumsnet for support. Finds it in unprecedented comic quantity.

THE END.

I am crying at the Spanish translations .

You do realise there's a very good chance that with all the poetry, songs and Spanish shenanigans we'll forget what the original thread was about....

Freudian poor little thing. I hope doglet feels better soon. The cone of shame and Po in the same photo.
🐕🐶

Schadenfreude you are LEGEND!! I am not worthy.

Dear buggering hedgehogs - I take my eyes off you lot for a few hours to earn my crust and there are another 600 posts, more songs (a Madrigal! :)), fashion items, more defence regiments and the one and only Abuela!

I am now in my billet (working away from home) and have caught up with thread 9 and GoT. Ecstatic to hear that Abuela has landed.

I think I have caught up on the songs, rogues, defenders of the OP and partay goers but please let me know of errors, mislinks, pictures missed etc.

Translate.schaden.com is Very Naughty Indeed and has therefore been Trelloed

@Faith gutted to hear you are gutty but look forward to the next verses of the Sacred Codex :)

Thank you to Trello helpers - We have so much content now that we may need to split out music in to genres!

OP - hope you are nestled with Abuela, Sangria and Paella!

Ok so been lurking since the beginning (and reading CFN as cunt face neighbours ) but are the original builders actually the CFNs?!?!

Schadenfreude your Spanglish translation has just about finished me off.... too much wine....too much chortling.....now I have hiccups...... DH and DS looking at me with "oh God She's Off" tone of face.

Thank you so much for the summary re: Return of the Neighbours.

Cast aspersions on my Spanish, will you!!??

You are obviously envious of my fluency in Espagnol, Faith

Jealousy is an ugly emotion . . . .

This is your life and garden, surely you want it sorted?

All is safely in the Hands of the Relevant Authorities.Poppins.

Jealousy is an ugly emotion....

It's not jealousy. I was TRYING to keep my subtle references to semen under the radar. Then you came along.

Are those tee-shirts commercially available Faith?

We could wear them under our ponchos.

.

They are, and they're actually very reasonable - but someone from the US would have to take over ordering them/sending them on as that site doesn't ship outside the US. (I only made it for a bit of fun, and didn't bother checking prices/shipping as I didn't think it much mattered.)

Shameless placemarking

Breakfast - and it's a YES from me!
I'm so amazed by this thread that I want to give everyone on it a great big abrasive hug, like the SpanKiwis do! I love you all ❤️ I do, and I haven't touched a drop 🥂🍾
OP What a wonderful Mumsnet spirit you've released with your awful experience. Thank you for your calm, clarity, humour, and grace under pressure. I hope your home is soon back to normal, you've made many supportive (and creative) MN friends on here!

On past experience is it too early to suggest OP makes up in preparation the next thread and its title

Is SpanGran staying at your flat OP?
That's a second pair of eyes.

Abrasive hug back
runs away

Alternative scenario. OK everyone knows from BBC dramas that the culprit is never the obvious candidate. As BBC dramas are all perfect models for life if you apply this rule to Wattyy's situation we have to rule out the builders and even Ken as the CFN.

Instead imagine you have a friend who lives in a fantastic flat with a private garden. You love your friend and you love her flat and her garden. When the great flat next door comes up for sale you buy it and decide to surprise her. You arrange for your builder friends to turn your kitchen window into a door for you so that you and your friend can easily pop in to see each other and it will save you having to walk all the way round the outside. You order doors to match your good friend's and ( this is important people) a bench that will look perfect in the garden for you both to sit on while you drink your evening wine and solve the problems of the world. You arrange for the builders to do a quick job while your good friend is at work so that you can surprise her when she gets home. However, this is when things start to go wrong. The builders send you a picture of the job half way through the day and you realise they have installed the wrong doors. You order new doors but get another call from your builders to say that your good friend has rumbled the surprise and they have scarpered. You decide to pop round after work to come clean. However in the meantime you check for any interesting new threads in Mumsnet and discover your friend is HORRIFIED and that half the country is also spitting feathers. Your friend calls and asks you to come over for moral support. You agree with the full intention of letting her know your part in it over wine. By the time you arrive the first mumsnet thread is full and you discover you have committed a criminal act. Your good friend is about to go to the local shop and you panic because that the shopkeeper knows full well that you are the neighbour. Instead you offer to go and use the opportunity to persuade the shopkeeper to keep quiet until you are able to tell her. You recruit him as a source of misdirection and misinformation. You also call your good friend's Spanish Granny who is a granny substitute for all your good friend's friends. She tells you what an idiot you have been and tells you she will do what she can to help you sort it with your friend. Things have now spiralled out of control on mumsnet - they have even Trelloed it. You tape the doors shut to give your friend a sense of security. You also bring over the BENCH you bought to help secure the doors when she cuts the tape off.

You are eagerly waiting the arrival of SpanGran to help you to sort out this horrible horrible mess.

So sorry GLF but I have to exorcise this theory so that I can concentrate on the threads. I don't really believe it but there was no other way to get it out of my head.

Beeziekn33ze you can't say SpanKiwis!! I read it as Spanky-Wees!

Thanks @Soslowmo ! Now to try to catch up on the rest of this super fast moving thread!!

Faith, you're going to have to start producing that T shirt. Love the Spanish translations. Love these threads.

Watty, we all know the wheels of bureaucracy take a long time and whilst it only took a few hours to fit the door, it will be some time before a window is restored. Meanwhile we are all standing with you.

for you and Spangran.

Oi my Viva Espana hadn't made it onto trello

Chrcking in from Poland
Is that the 16th country or a repeat?