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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be annoyed there's a random man in my garden painting the fence at 7am!

350 replies

GetOutOfMYGarden · 29/07/2017 07:41

I'm a 25 year old woman living alone with two dogs in a terraced house. All houses in the row have an individual garden both in the back and front. I rent, most other people in the row own their house.

Next door has recently decided to renovate their back garden, including installing an (ugly) garage in there, building higher fences and a built in kennel for their three dogs. Wasn't bothered about any of this. To be honest I don't particularly like them that much so I don't mind not seeing them Grin

I came home from an overnight shift today at 7am. Parked behind my back gate as usual and found a random man on a stepladder in my garden painting the fence with Cuprinol! My other neighbour had let my dogs out in the garden at 6:30am for me as she always does when I'm on nights (lovely 89 year old lady who's recently been widowed, I pop in with dinner about twice a week for her and generally check she's okay since she's too depressed to cook for herself atm, her family can't be around every day and so she insists on doing this to 'repay' me) so they were milling around in there happily sniffing at his ladder (lucky I don't rely on them being guard dogs, isn't it!). Oddly enough, they haven't attempted this with the neighbour on the other side of them who has a massive Boerboel in the garden. Neighbours knew I was out for a night shift since they made a bit of conversation when I was leaving last night in my uniform and my car wasn't there. I'm usually back at about 9am but my shifts has ended early

Confronted him and asked who he was, he said the neighbours doing the garden renovations had said I'd given him permission to come into my garden and paint that side of the party fence. Pointed out that I clearly haven't as the gate was double locked and the dogs were out! Tells me 'sorry I thought you'd forgot so I hopped the fence, oh well love let me finish and I'll get out, you'll have to speak to [male neighbour]'. I told him certainly not and to get the fuck out of my garden now before I called the police. Told him that misled by my neighbour or not, I'm telling him right then and there that he had no permission to be in there.

Once he was out of the garden and I'd locked my gate properly again, I went round to knock on the neighbours' front door and ask what the fuck they're playing at. No answer, although they were definitely in, I could hear CBeebies blasted through the wall to my living room for their DS and their cars were all in their usual parking spots. I went upstairs for a wee (bursting at this point Blush) and through the bathroom window I could hear the male neighbour, female neighbour and the painter in his garden bitching about me, calling me a rude bitch! I shouted down mid wee that no, I wasn't, and asked if it was okay for me to come in his bloody garden without permission! No answer to that one.

Neighbours won't answer the door to speak about it and I'm tired after a night shift and I don't feel I can go to sleep until this is sorted lest this cheeky man hop my fence again Sad To be honest if they'd asked and had it done on a day I was in, I'd have given them permission!

OP posts:
SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 29/07/2017 20:55

Your home, your right not to have Tosser Painter Man in your garden. You asked him to leave. He didn't. He deserved to be told more strongly, and presumably wouldn't have engaged in the same level of debate with Brick Toilet Bouncer Man on the other side. Because there is always a chance that BTBM might have hit him. It's about boundaries, and I am amazed at the people who don't see their property as being under their control. What the hec's that all about?

SnickersWasAHorse · 29/07/2017 20:56

CFN's wife has apologised and slipped a milk tray through my door.

That wins the prize.

I don't get the 'I'd be happy to have my fence painted' people.
It's not having the fence painted that is the problem but the fact that a random man turned up in her garden uninvited.

What I don't get though is that he has replaced and painted the fence on both your side and BNN side. One of them isn't his to replace.

MargoChanning · 29/07/2017 20:58

Good grief! Shock < my face right now

ButchyRestingFace · 29/07/2017 21:02

CFN's wife has apologised and slipped a milk tray through my door

Check the sell-by-date and that the seal hasn't been broken on the packet.

I wouldn't, OP. 🤞

Cocolepew · 29/07/2017 21:12
Shock
MyProperTea · 29/07/2017 21:12

Not shore how I would feel about somone leaving chocolate where my dog could get it but I guess the poor ladies heart is in the right place.

MaximaDeWit · 29/07/2017 21:13

What I don't get though is that he has replaced and painted the fence on both your side and BNN side. One of them isn't his to replace.

Has OP said they're not both CFN's fences? His deeds could say he responsible for both sides

SnickersWasAHorse · 29/07/2017 21:14

I doubt he is responsible for both. Not in the middle of a terrace.

Scarpetta1982 · 29/07/2017 21:27

Definitely is the weekend for CFN's!
Maybe the recent combination of heat and rain has steamed any brain cells rendering them incapable of non delusional thoughts!
Can't believe he threw a paintbrush into the window?! Was he attempting to Cuprinol the household interior also? Hmm Smile

Lucysky2017 · 29/07/2017 21:34

Oh dear dear dear. This awful neighbour and his poor wife. There is nothing worse than a husband who embarrasses you like this. The man just needs to calm down. I wonder why he was bothered about painting the fence on one side? Why not just leave it rather than incur the expense. It seems weird. My neighbour and I have bits of our fence down behind the hedge and we just leave it (none of us has dogs I suppose or small children now so it doesn't matter - in the 1960s one other neighbour had a tiger by the way bought at harrods !!! in the garden presumably tied in in some way although my neighbour says it got out once).

Your landlady sounds very sensible.

SteppingOnToes · 29/07/2017 21:35

Wow I second definitely a weekend for CFNs! I've been pointed over here from the window/doors CFN mammoth thread. You've a while to go before it reaches epic proportions like that but you certainly have drama! Sorry you have shitty neighbours - at least your LL is a star

RebootYourEngine · 29/07/2017 21:50

Milk tray taste shit these days. Who the fuck thinks apple flavoured chocolates are a good thing Angry

Lostinaseaofbubbles · 29/07/2017 21:59

I'm in the middle of a terrace (ex council) and I am indeed responsible for the fences on all sides of my property. When the council sold the properties they got rid of as much liability as they could and one neighbour is still council, not sure about the other but I guess at any rate this house was sold first.

Just wanted to say that it is quite possible that he may be responsible for fences on both sides.

Leinlondon · 29/07/2017 22:00

Also here from the listed building window/doors thread. What is up with all these deranged neighbours?? OP you were always completely reasonable in my view - you only told workman to get TF out when he refused to leave and if you'd seen the CFNs the night before on your way out to your night shift then the only decent, neighbourly thing for them to have done would have been to raise it with you at that point and ask permission to access your garden while you were out (they should have also cleared it with your LL). Bizarre posts from PP who would have made the workman a brew... I would be livid at the audacity of someone letting themselves into my property without permission. In any case, CFN is in this case also clearly CFDN (completely fucking deranged neighbour) - imagine there is going to be a set-to of epic proportions when Beefy Nice Neighbour gets his hands on him. I have had no life this weekend keeping on top of goings-on in CFN-land!

Ghjklf · 29/07/2017 22:07

Has OP said they're not both CFN's fences? His deeds could say he responsible for both sides

His deeds could say that but it's very unlikely (although NOT impossible) . I suggested the OP check out the situation because if CFN has removed a fence that doesn't belong to him then that's a whole new level of cheeky fuckery.

Ghjklf · 29/07/2017 22:10

Just wanted to say that it is quite possible that he may be responsible for fences on both sides.

I agree it's possible and I clearly said as much when I first raised the issue of the CFN replacing BOTH fences, however it would be UNUSUAL. I think is definitely worth the OP double checking.

Kezzamo · 29/07/2017 22:17

Hi, shamelessly place marking. Loving the CFN threads this week. What a truly awful hit! Poor wife! I think you need to rescue her op!

JuicyNectarine · 29/07/2017 22:19

Who the actual fuck tries to block in the car of a parent trying to get their child to hospital out of spite and then breaks windows?

Seriously WTF.

Do not eat those chocolates or anything else that lot offer OP.

And if that child is considered disabled then you have witnessed a hate crime and should report it as such.

Poisonous bastard.

StaplesCorner · 29/07/2017 22:19

His deeds don't say he can be an entitled tosser and cause criminal damage though do they now? Eh? More tea please.

Ghjklf · 29/07/2017 22:33

Bizarre posts from PP who would have made the workman a brew.

I was one of several posters that said they would have made the workmam a brew. I don't think it's a bizarre idea at all. If the OP had done this then he could have finished the fence and she could still have explained to her neighbour that she didn't appreciate him telling the workman he could access her garden. The CFN would have been MUCH more likely to listen to her point of view. All the aggravation and nastiness would have been avoided and the OP wouldn't have to be worrying about living next to a violent man who now has a grudge against her.

Sometimes it's not sensible to fight fire with fire.

JuicyNectarine · 29/07/2017 22:38

What the fuck is with all the mansplaining "be a doormat OP" bullshit, is this the mn weekend daily fail infiltration?

No. A complete sentence.

PancakesAteTheChildren · 29/07/2017 22:42

😮

Cakeorchocolate · 29/07/2017 22:48

Wow! All over a fence. Hope the CFN doesnt block anyones car in. Enjoy the chocs.

Leinlondon · 29/07/2017 22:48

But Ghjklf, OP didn't want the workman to finish the fence. She wanted him out of her garden. I make workmen I have invited onto my property cups of tea - not strangers who have invited themselves onto my land.
I understand what you are saying about trying to be reasonable, but when faced with the unreasonable behaviour of the CFN instructing his workman onto OP's property without permission, followed by the workman's unreasonable behaviour at not leaving when asked politely, I do not see where in this series of events it would have made sense to start boiling the kettle.

LakieLady · 29/07/2017 22:50

This sudden eruption of CFNs is very weird. Is it a full moon?

Brick Shithouse Boerboel Man sounds nice, and CFN is clearly an aggressive idiot, as well as a CFN.