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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wish the world was more autism friendly?

190 replies

Tobythecat · 25/07/2017 10:46

I wish for the following -

  • dimmed lighting in all supermarkets shops and offices
-neutral packaging with no patterns in shops and supermarkets
  • every road or busy side road to have a crossing
  • Easily read signs to helps with finding your way around
  • Phone calls not allowed on public transport unless an emergency
  • No loud chatting on the bus and giggling like a banshee
-Autism-friendly jobs (perhaps linked to individuals special interest)
  • Autism rooms in shops/supermarkets to retreat to if feeling overwhelmed
-No music in shops -Loud people must be fitted with a volume control device, and if they exceed the limit, they get hit on the head
  • People who beep their car horns to greet friends on the street/road should have their horn removed and wear a t-shirt that says I am a twat.

Feel free to add your own!

OP posts:
youarenotkiddingme · 25/07/2017 19:48

I'd wish for more understanding that those with Autism can act and present as nt for short periods of time.
However the fallout of this has a major effect and they need downtime.

I hate the "well he/she/you coped when ......"

BishopBrennansArse · 25/07/2017 19:50

"No, you can't be autistic"
Get it alllllll the time 🙄
Yeah I mask well but then I need to recover and it's getting harder as I get older. For this reason I try and make sure the kids don't do it.

Sirzy · 25/07/2017 19:55

"He can talk so he can't be autistic" is the best one I have had Hmm

ProudAS · 25/07/2017 20:04

I've had "you can't be autistic you work" doesn't quite top Sirzy's post but think of Bill Gates

MoMandaS · 25/07/2017 20:06

Yes, yes, youarenot, that's one of the things I mean!

DixieNormas · 25/07/2017 20:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsLupo · 25/07/2017 22:21

Yes, no artificially scented products, no perfume, no air freshener. Amazed that someone upthread would recommend Lush - I can't even walk past their branches on the street without wanting to die.

No unstraight pictures, mirrors or signs.

No reorganising the layout of the supermarket every couple of weeks.

No school gate (toxic mix of shrieky noise, unwanted social advances, potential for random interactions with other people's unpredictable children), no PTA (constant requests for active involvement that require me either to disclose my disability or seem difficult and evasive), no toddler groups (ugh, joining in!).

No loud sudden noises (roaring motorbikes, cars backfiring, sirens, fire alarms, doors slamming, things being banged down on tables, etc, etc, etc).

No hubbubby places - pubs, bars, busy cafes with bass notes of coffee grinder and top notes of clinking crockery. And don't get me started on swimming pool acoustics.

No places where people behave differently by mutual understanding from the stated methods/rules/etiquette - an example might be cafes where you're supposed to choose and pay before taking up a table, but people frequently do it all wrong.

I could go on all day. Lucky this isn't actually a grassroots movement, because tbh if I ruled the world pretty much everyone else would be required to sit still and quietly, generating no unnatural scents, and offering no unwanted advice (I also have PDA).

High five to all the other aspies on this thread. Smile

BeeFarseer · 25/07/2017 22:28
MrsLupo · 25/07/2017 23:30

Oh, yeah, and another thing that unglues me is when you go to the supermarket and you get the last, say, two packs of something, but they have different best before dates on them. Just shouldn't be allowed. I can't count the amount of wasted life I spend trying to figure out what to do. Buy them both anyway? (Toothsuck) Get just one? (But...) Put them both back and get something else entirely? Like I say: Shouldn't. Be Allowed.

And yes, more understanding about how much energy goes into holding it all together. I once 'came out' to someone I was going to be working with and who needed to know I have ASD. 'Well, pfffft,' she said, 'YOU can only have one teeny tiny toenail on the spectrum' - which presumably was intended as a compliment. Well, nope, I wanted to say, why do you think I'm so tired, stressed and prone to illness all the time? It's not for the good of MY health.

fatdogs · 25/07/2017 23:37

This reply has been deleted

We feel that this post is disablist. Talk Guidelines.

fatdogs · 25/07/2017 23:42

This reply has been deleted

We feel that this post is disablist. Talk Guidelines.

fatdogs · 25/07/2017 23:45

@mrslupo yes everyone should be required to sit entirely still. Are we allowed to breathe or would it maybe be too loud and annoy you in some way. We should just hold our breathe until we die then shall we? The world would certainly be a much quieter place

MrsLupo · 25/07/2017 23:58

Flowers for you, fatdogs, as you're obviously feeling left out.

Leyxhi · 26/07/2017 00:30

Why doesn't everyone in the world just die besides those with autism? Would that makes things easier? In that way there would be certainly much less noise or any possible human interaction which may possibly be a trigger? Seems like some people on this thread would very much like that.
Hmm Biscuit

blankface · 26/07/2017 00:31

Biscuit for you fatdogs do go and eat it outside, there's a dear.

fatdogs · 26/07/2017 00:34

@blankface no thanks dearie, I am not one for sweets.

ArmySal · 26/07/2017 00:46

wish

verb
1.
feel or express a strong desire or hope for something that cannot or probably will not happen.
"we wished for peace"
synonyms: desire, want, hope for, long for, yearn for, crave, hunger for, thirst for, lust after, covet, sigh for, pine for, dream of; More
2.
want to do something.
"they wish to become involved"
synonyms: want, desire, have an inclination, feel/be inclined, feel like, care; More
noun
1.
a desire or hope for something to happen.
"the union has reiterated its wish for an agreement"
synonyms: desire, longing, hope, yearning, inclination, urge, whim, craving, hunger, thirst, lust; More

HTH, fatdogs.

fatdogs · 26/07/2017 00:56

Well then yes I would say it is unreasonable to wish for something that would put people in mortal danger such as abolishing the sounding of police sirens and fire alarms.

FanjoForTheMammaries · 26/07/2017 00:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FanjoForTheMammaries · 26/07/2017 00:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Leyxhi · 26/07/2017 01:01

Yanbu luco to think and about a world where the things that affect your life in a crappy way would be gone, Clearly your not advocating killing people ffs.

ArmySal · 26/07/2017 01:03

I bet you're loads of fun at parties fatdogs, a right barrel of laughs Hmm

IntoTheDeep · 26/07/2017 01:27

fatdogs posts above are a great example of the lack of understanding and empathy towards people with ASD that I'd like to see less of.

No acknowledgement that noise, crowds and so on might be genuinely difficult to cope with, but instead acting as if these difficulties are some sort of personal attack or insult towards people who cope just fine.

Incitatis · 26/07/2017 02:04

Why doesn't everyone in the world just die besides those with autism? Would that makes things easier? In that way there would be certainly much less noise or any possible human interaction which may possibly be a trigger? Seems like some people on this thread would very much like that.

Those pesky NTs, going around expressing their hysterical hyperboles Grin

Calm down dear, it's just hypothetical musings Wink

Want2bSupermum · 26/07/2017 02:15

I really wish every child in the U.K. received the help that DS gets here in the US. It's world class help. The help he has had means he is learning to cope with the real world.

I also wish people on MN were a lot more understanding. Too many times I've been told it's silly or I'm exaggerating what I'm experiencing in RL. Yes cutting up food for 2 DC, ages 5 and 3, younger one with ASD does take me forever. Timed it with three D.C.'s and it takes me 20mins. My DC are hard work!!!

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