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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU buy they copied our wedding dance

401 replies

NotForSale · 24/07/2017 04:17

Background-
Group of friends, all couples, friends for about 4/5 years. DH and I got married last year and this particular couple came. Earlier this year, all couples together watching films and the song that came on when the credits rolled so DH and I decided to recreate our dance after a few drinks. A few days later female friend said to me that that was actually the wedding song they have planned, they had completely forgotten we had used it at our wedding (how could they?! Our dancing was amazing, lol) and did I mind? Of course I said no, it's a song, who has ownership of a song etc.
Fast forward to their wedding this weekend, and they used said song, but also had exactly the same dance routine. I mean, everything identical (we went to lessons and learnt it). Isn't that a bit weird? Like less than 12months later they're doing the same dance routine to the same song? Even if they went to lessons to learn it (but they say they haven't had lessons) then they could ask for a different routine ?
I know you can't have ownership of a song (or a dance) but AIBU to expect that you at least do your own version? Mutual friends attending both weddings so if they care (probably don't) it would be pretty obvious.

OP posts:
CorbynsBumFlannel · 24/07/2017 13:11

Still not quite getting how they managed to copy the dance after seeing it once 'after a few drinks' when they didn't remember it from the actual wedding.
I'd be asking whoever you paid for multiple lessons for your money back op!

Butteredparsnip1ps · 24/07/2017 13:12

I'm trying to decide if it was Bryan Adams or Wet Wet Wet

TSS I love the idea of your Husband protecting the bar from running away! Just in Case.

iknowimcoming · 24/07/2017 13:12

Literally crying Grin

  1. Yabu to be still being a bridezilla about your wedding which was a year ago
  2. Did the dance start off all traditional ballroom like, then was there a noise like when in olden days the needle scratched across the record whereupon you and the groom looked at the dj in mock horror and then a funny funky song came on instead which hilariously was all part of your plan and you had a dance prepared for that too - nope never been at a wedding where that happened Hmm

I love weddings but the pimped up first dances are just cringetastic- bring back the old fashioned smooch for 1 minute before inviting all the guests to join in pleeeeeeease

Bluntness100 · 24/07/2017 13:18

Ok, I love a good wedding as much as the next person, but I have to say you're being unreasonable because

It's not your dance or song
No one remembers after the wedding, your friend wasn't lying, she will have forgot
You recreated the dance for your mates a year later ( that's totally cringe)
You seem to think your dance was so amazing it will go down in the annals of history as "your" song and dance
You think everyone will remember it it was that good
You recreated the dance for your mates a year later, did I mention that?
You're actually genuinely peeved about they used the same one, as you think it's yours
So much so you actually posted a thread on it, which is even more cringe,
Did I mention you recreated the dance for your mates a year later, after watching a movie? Blush

If this is the only thing you've got to worry about, then congrats on your perfect life, but you're way too over invested in this. Let it go.

notaslimceagirl · 24/07/2017 13:22

I've just googled the geller dance to see what people were talking about. Amazing!
Could it work for a silver wedding anniversary dance? Hmm

WaspsAreBastards · 24/07/2017 13:22

Let it go is there a dance that goes with that? Grin

Only1scoop · 24/07/2017 13:25

Did the dance start off all traditional ballroom like, then was there a noise like when in olden days the needle scratched across the record whereupon you and the groom looked at the dj in mock horror and then a funny funky song came on instead which hilariously was all part of your plan and you had a dance prepared for that too - nope never been at a wedding where that happened 
GrinGrinGrinGrinGrinGrinGrin
Summarised perfectly

Only1scoop · 24/07/2017 13:26

Was it ....funky Cold Medina

CoughLaughFart · 24/07/2017 13:29

I think those of us who aren't married should claim our first dance songs on this thread to make sure no one else is tempted to use them.

In that spirit, if I get a sniff that any of you are even thinking about 'Oi've Got a Brand New Comboine 'Arvester' by The Wurzels, I'll have your eyes.

53rdWay · 24/07/2017 13:30

The Geller Routine! Damn it, now I do wish I'd had a first dance.

(I don't think the OP is as anwywhere near as worked up about this as you seem to be, Bluntness!)

MrsKoala · 24/07/2017 13:33

Baby got back?

WaspsAreBastards · 24/07/2017 13:35

if I get a sniff that any of you are even thinking about 'Oi've Got a Brand New Comboine 'Arvester' by The Wurzels, I'll have your eyes.

Grin
alltoomuchrightnow · 24/07/2017 13:40

Funky Cold Medina! PLEASE let it be.
I've never witnessed a Wedding Dance, I'm deprived.
Seems all a bit Phoenix Nights to me...

TheCraicDealer · 24/07/2017 13:45

DP and I are still trying to decide on our first dance song. He wants "The Times They Are a'Changin'" (Me: "Isn't that a protest song?" Him: "Precisely.") whilst my vote is for "Bad Moon Rising". We will do the awkward shuffle for a verse and then the bridal party have to get up and join us before the prosecco wears off and I start cringing. I looked briefly into dancing lessons so I might feel less awkward about it, but the various places I looked at were charging £130 for three hour-long lessons. I noped the fuck out of that.

The organiser at the venue asked if we were doing anything like a choreographed dance and my DP said, "Yeah, we're having a rap battle". She just looked blankly at him until he confirmed he was joking.

DonaldStott · 24/07/2017 13:45

Unless you done the robot, to kraftwerk or something. That would have been amazing.

53rdWay · 24/07/2017 13:46

I have never seen a choreographed wedding dance either, apart from a ceilidh which I suppose is a whole evening of choreographed dancing. (And a lot more fun than an awkward shuffle round to Aerosmith lasting thirty seconds because "Darren doesn't do dancing." One of the good things about ceilidhs is that men will actually bloody dance!)

anotherdayanothernc · 24/07/2017 14:01

My sil forced my very shy brother in to one of those hilarious dances where the groom makes a tit of himself and the bride just looks mildly funny but mostly sexy. She'd pulled it together from watching 100s of funny you tubes videos from equally crazy cool people.

It was a fucking tooth puller to watch, my brother clearly felt the most awkward he ever had in his life.

Should have known then she would be a horrible horrible person to marry.

Anyway, yabu.

MaisyPops · 24/07/2017 14:01

Did the dance start off all traditional ballroom like, then was there a noise like when in olden days the needle scratched across the record whereupon you and the groom looked at the dj in mock horror and then a funny funky song came on instead which hilariously was all part of your plan and you had a dance prepared for that too
GrinGrinGrin
Bonus points for getting some Michael Jackson in there or a mashup that you've made yourself.

(Best only decent one I saw was a mashup but still).

PuppyMonkey · 24/07/2017 14:03

What a claaaic thread - first post in and boom:

"Today 04:19 Cornycopia

I think you're unreasonable to have a song, have a dance, have friends who have a dance, imagine that mutual friends would notice or care and to make this thread about it all."

Grin

I'll be very disappointed if it wasn't the zombie dance from Thriller OP.

PuppyMonkey · 24/07/2017 14:04
  • classic thread
Jackiebrambles · 24/07/2017 14:06

This thread has cheered me right up! Am howling at the owl in the rafters with the rings refusing to fly down.

Op I wish I had your life tbh, what a thing to get bent out of shape about!

AmIAWeed · 24/07/2017 14:09

MargaretCavendish Yep, it is because you're a grumpy vegetarian!!!!
Our wedding was very much taken over by people who 'knew better' and had many many opinions, mixed in with incompetent suppliers and we were ridiculously stressed by the whole thing.
Being stupid and dancing was exactly what we needed. We have both agreed we shall never divorce as we are NOT prepared to ever get married again
If I did it again I'd bloody elope,
and do a private choreographed dance
and upload to YouTube!

BoysofMelody · 24/07/2017 14:12

Please say it's Black Lance's Gang Bang from Rita Sue and Bob too! Please.*

  • But pound to a penny it is Dirty Dancing
34AQuid · 24/07/2017 14:19

The thought of my poor DH having to lift me over his head. Certainly wouldn't have been 'the time of his life'...

Wondermoomin · 24/07/2017 14:22

Hang on a minute. You learned a special dance by attending lessonS (emphasis on the multiple) and this other woman observed you doing the dance in someone's living room at the end of a film and was able to replicate that dance EXACTLY based on that viewing? The same dance that you perfected over several lessons? Have I missed something here?

I think it's quite funny really. Surely the only thing worse than having a choreographed wedding dance is having a choreographed wedding dance that several guests have already seen.

But if she really pulled it off as you say, I'm impressed at her obviously natural talent, to master a dance so quickly and easily when it took other fantastic dancers several lessons to get to grips with it.