To not understand parents crying at the end of infant school

[SEsofty]

So today my eldest left infant school, and will be continuing onto the junior school along with ninety percent of the year.

I was surrounded by parents crying their eyes out, incredibly upset. I simply don't understand.

So could someone please explain to me why lots of people are crying simply because their child is going onto the next year of school.

Aibu to not understand?

Well, I was absolutely delighted when DD left her (rubbish) primary school. Also I wasn't sad about leaving a part of her childhood behind as I'd always found very young children dull (or not the kids - more the activities around the kids).

But I did well up a bit. And I think for me it wasn't sadness, so much. But I found it quite moving - to see how she'd grown, to see what a fantastic young person she'd become, iykwim. She was her own unique self, nothing to do with me, and this struck home at the Y6 leaving assembly.

It's just a poignant moment isn't it? The weepy parents shed a tear at the end of one era and they'll miss the old school, it's not like they continue at home all night - they get over it I'm sure.

I felt emotional when DS1 was leaving nursery. He'd gone from various food allergies, to a speech delay with lots of support with his lovely key worker. He was ready for school, and a lot of that was due to the support that he'd received there, so it was bittersweet that that relationship was ending as he moved on to his next ones. I felt a bit of a tit about it as I still had two years ahead with DS2 there, so I was still turning up multiple times a week

DS2's turn is coming up now, and my emotions are a bit different. He's had a simpler path in life so far, he's been ready to move on for some time, and he's venturing into the known world of DS1's school.

I'm not desperate to cling on to them being babies, but transition points can be sadness at what is left behind, and happiness at what is to come.

So much buttoned up, repressed and emotionally unhealthy sentiment!
I'm not talking shoulders heaving, box of Kleenex oh woe is me crying. I did have a tear, he was leaving kids he had known for 9 years behind, and staff who had done their utmost for him (SEN).

Oh and I'm autistic. We're not supposed to have feelings, apparently 🙄

Sorry, who said that?

DD's school did that song at the end of Year Six

One more step along the road I go
La la la la la de dum dum dum

I well up just thinking of it

Competitive passiveness is as bad as competitive "I love my child" on here.

Posters clamouring to say "I couldn't give a shit when my child left school, not only did I NOT cry like some of the tart parents, I grumbled loudly about how I wish it was sixth form they were leaving and then kicked my child in the back. I don't understand these parents who care about their children".

Good for you, let other people have their moment

I do, Cherry I don't walk up to sobbing parents and inform them that I think they are setting their child a terrible example.

But when asked on here, I will concede that I do, yes.

Our school played 'days of our lives' by queen. It was sad.
Music always sets me off.

I don't get being sad about your child growing up. And certainly not crying about it. I too, must be made of stone.

I guess I just don't understand happy tears, never cried at weddings etc. So I only associate crying with sadness.

Oh well clearly we are all different

I'm not a crier, but it is sad saying goodbye to their friends and teachers.

Because its sad watching them leave their teacher ( the 1 they spend more time a day with than you so they naturally have a close attachment). They are getting older and that in itself is sad cus the big wide world is a horrible place and soon they will have to venture out alone. End of an era? I cry at any school things my kids are in. I don't know how cus generally I'm pretty 'frosty' .I remember when I left primary school (30+ years ago) I was almost suicidal at never seeing my teacher again! I thought she was the best thing since sliced bread! It's sad. I was/am never good at goodbyes. Rips me to shreds.

Assembly and children singing is cute and emotional. That's entirely different. That was NOT what OP was referring to.
Accused of having an empathy bypass? Nope. I disagree.

I cried alone on boxing day when iplayed George michaels listen without prejudice cd. I had never met him or his family, but i felt sad he had died as he felt part of my adulthood! Off topic, but a quiet cry on ones own isnt always bad. Same with kids, passing of time and all that.
I,have got worse with the crying though. Have to hide it.

The people who 'don't understand' or think that the emotions sshould be kept private or are 'stupid'- I strongly suspect these people are secretly aliens who don't understand our earth emotions and how they work. Feelings are feelings. You can't stop feeling them because someone thinks they're stupid, nor do they have to make logical sense. People can cry with sadness, or happiness, or pride, or nostalgia, or anger, or hysteria, or shock or any number of other feelings that aren't possible to just switch off. This can't be that hard to comprehend, surely?

If I were to cry at DS leaving nursery and going on to Primary, it would likely have been prompted by the stark reminder of the constant march of time and the inevitability of death.

Of course it's not hard to comprehend. In an average day I will feel sadness, happiness, amusement, irritation, anger, frustration, fear, worry, perplexity and confusion.

It wouldn't be appropriate or fair to share the majority of those feelings with everybody all of the time.

I do think that they pick songs guaranteed to make you cry, but also it is emotional to see them taking another step in life. And I do get a little emotional at them growing up, why wouldnt I?

I don't get it. But then again I also don't understand the recent thing for pre school/nursery 'graduations' and getting the kids dressed up in gowns and mortar boards either so maybe I'm just a grinch.

A proud moment, there child didn't eat all the crayons......

Yes Gherkin exactly. And the long cold eternity in the earth feeling nothing at all. Gather ye nutmegs and cry all your tears why ye may....

I get a bit emotional when the start and end of a school year, not floods of tears, but a bit glassy eyed. To be honest it's as much for them as it is for me, I don't like things ending and marking the passing of time.
I'm also a bit sad every New Year's Eve, for the same reason, it marks time much more for me than a birthday, not sure why.

Just to add, I don't mind celebrating it and a bit of 'yey it's the next step for you and say thank you to your teachers'.

I just don't get the over the top adult reactions. It reminds me of being in school and 2 parents had camcorders (when they were new and flashy) and they'd turn up everywhere with this bloody camcorder and prattle excessively about the most basic life events.
I bet they were the founding fathers of #makingmemories