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Original poster

To think if a young child asks about periods you should just give them the facts?

155 replies

RedStripeIassie · 18/07/2017 13:38

My dd (just 4) is a superglue child and still comes with me to the toilet 9/10 times. She notices each month I 'have blood wee wee' which is what she calls them and she's just started asking more. I've explained that women and older girls have blood in a part of their tummy that comes out and we use types of bandages to catch it. She's asking lots of questions and saying randomly 'boys don't have the blood in their tummies' etc. She wanted to know where it comes out so I told her out of my fanny and so she did the whole 'girls have fannys, boys have willys' thing on repeat.

To me that all seems ok but I'm doubting myself now as she'll be talking about it at pre school and I wonder if teachers etc will be Hmm at what I've said or the fact she's on with me whilst I'm changing tampons etc. It's ok isn't it?

OP posts:
YoureNotASausage · 18/07/2017 13:41

Yes, it's fine. You're not beating her or starving her. You are telling her a fact and not even a horrible or scary fact. Just a natural one.

shivermytimbers · 18/07/2017 13:44

Nothing wrong with being honest at all! And don't worry if she repeats what you've said, it's all part of processing the information (DS spent many a happy afternoon in the supermarket practicing all the words he knew for penis and vagina Grin)
I would probably be a bit more factually accurate though and use the words tampon etc- bandages have association with injuries and I would want to avoid that link.
I found the explanation that women bleed every month which shows there's no baby growing in their womb helpful, but stick with whatever you're comfortable with

Mummymummyme · 18/07/2017 13:45

It's absolutely fine, you're explaining the facts to her in a way that she can digest. If you explain it and normalise it when she's young there's a good chance that she'll grow up knowledgeable and not feeling grossed out by something that's perfectly natural.

Original poster
RedStripeIassie · 18/07/2017 13:46

I didn't know about periods till I was taught in year 5. I really want to avoid that!!

OP posts:
KingJoffreysRestingCuntface · 18/07/2017 13:48

DS wasn't allowed to call his penis a 'penis'.

They made him say 'bobbin'.

Fucking 'bobbin'.

He's 14 now and it still winds me up.

So yes, some teachers can be a bit squeamish about it.

UnderneaththeArchers · 18/07/2017 13:49

Perfectly sensible to tell her - personally I was rather more factual with the explanation. And don't worry about what others think - your child/your rules in this area.

clumsyduck · 18/07/2017 13:49

It's fine . I have a toilet follower as well 😆 He asked what it was and I explained ( simply ) I'm quite honest with anything he asks like that as my parents were with me .

Some of the ideas of school mates about where babies came from even at senior school were quite laughable !!

Youcanttaketheskyfromme · 18/07/2017 13:53

Yes.

My mum wouldn't even tell me what the tampon machines in the women's toilets were for. I must have been about 9 or 10. Just ushered me out.

She eventually told me something but phrased it as though it was something dirty and not to be talked about.

I got hold of a magazine when I was about 13 that was very informative. Just as bloody well I was a late starter.

I'm only 29 as well.

Youcanttaketheskyfromme · 18/07/2017 13:54

Also ..

I had a friend when I was about 17 who didn't know where her own clitoris was. She was very confused about what her partner was doing during sex.

Biology matters.

BasketOfDeplorables · 18/07/2017 13:55

KingJoffrey, you are king of the pun!

Shadow666 · 18/07/2017 13:55

There are loads of books around aimed at young kids that can help her visualise things.

Mothervulva · 18/07/2017 13:55

My 4 year old knows as she's seen the blood. She accepted the facts and that was the end of it.

I used to teach sex Ed and prefer a matter of fact approach to how our body works.

knockknockknock · 18/07/2017 13:56

@KingJoffreysRestingCuntface

Bobbin 😱. Adds a whole dimension to Wind the bobbin up doesn't it 🤣🤣

ceeveebee · 18/07/2017 13:59

I told my DD that I grow a pillow made out of blood in my tummy in case a baby comes along, and then the pillow comes out. She seemed to be happy with that and has asked me since whether it's pillow time or not!!

Lancelottie · 18/07/2017 13:59

I have happy memories of eavesdropping on a small child of about 5 in a public loo who was carefully sounding out the notice telling you not to 'fl-u-sh t-am-p-on-s or s-an-i-t-ar-eee it-ems -- mummy, I read it, I read it, what's a tampong and a snatterery it-em?'

FuzzyOwl · 18/07/2017 14:01

Definitely. I only found out about periods the day mine started (admittedly I was a very early starter) but I will make sure my children grow up knowing it is a fact of life.

PinkHeart5911 · 18/07/2017 14:01

You've done the right thing, it's the best way to be with children and as she gets older becuase you've been honest she will feel like she can talk to you about these things.

I don't know why some parents lie, or are awkward about this stuff. I remember being at school with my friends about aged 13 and she started her period, she wasn't even sure what was going on or what to do with the always pad i gave her

Original poster
RedStripeIassie · 18/07/2017 14:07

Phew! Glad to hear that. It wasn't really talked about before we got them at home and worse on my dh's side. He was told girls are dirty so don't kiss or touch them Shock . That was the extent of any kind of sex Ed in that house!

OP posts:
TheSparrowhawk · 18/07/2017 14:08

Your 'fanny'? Seriously?? I'd be pretty shocked if my DD came home saying the word 'fanny' because she heard it from a classmate. The word is vagina ffs! I don't understand why adults use such ridiculous words, it just confuses children. There's no pillow and it's not in your tummy - it's your uterus.

My DD, who's 4, knows that the a baby grows in a mummy's uterus and the uterus prepares for a baby every month with blood for the placenta, but if an egg doesn't get fertilised then the blood comes out the mummy's vagina, which is also where the baby comes out. It makes perfect sense to her. I'd imagine the whole tummy pillow thing just comes across as total nonsense.

TheSparrowhawk · 18/07/2017 14:09

Oh and they're not bandages - bandages are for cuts. They're pads, which are used for soaking up the blood.

Original poster
RedStripeIassie · 18/07/2017 14:12

I like the pillow tummy thing. It's really sweet but it's kind of right too.

I will change bandages though.

What's wrong with Fanny? She'll learn vagina later. I've got nothing against vagina but it seems so grown up.

OP posts:
demirose87 · 18/07/2017 14:13

when my son's asked why I have "nappies" I just say that ladies need them. I think if he asked me now at age 8 I'd give him a basic talk on periods without going into too much detail, but if his sisters ask at that age I think I'd give more information. I started mine young so its likely they will too, they need to know the facts.

MrsOverTheRoad · 18/07/2017 14:17

Fanny is seen as coarse OP. A bit like saying "Cock" or similar. If you let DD say that, then some parents will be quite shocked.

m4rdybum · 18/07/2017 14:17

@TheSparrowhawk

Don't see anything wrong with children using alternative words for vagina/penis. To me, they seem so medical/cold/harder to relate to?

I still refer to mine as a foof.

dementedpixie · 18/07/2017 14:17

Fanny is a terrible word for it. Although in Scotland we use it as an insult!

Haw you, ya wee fanny, whit did you dae that fir ? Grin