To think someone never being in a relationship is odd

[scenesatthemusuem]

Why might this be the case I wonder?

I married young and had a hideous break up. I couldn't face another relationship for about 12 years. My family whispered to each other that I must be a closet gay. That there was something 'wrong' with me. I realise my few friends probably gossiped in a similar way.
The truth was that My confidence was shot, I couldn't trust anyone, my mental health was dodgy, I felt uninteresting, ugly, fat, a failure. Who would want me? So I didn't bother trying to date. I was safer at home on my own.

Thank God my now DH saw me from afar at work and eventually plucked up courage to find out if I was single. Then he presumed me despite my efforts to put him off. He is almost as shy and lacking in confidence as me. He's never had a serious relationship before me. We are perfect for each other and now have a lovely social circle.

I'm bloody lucky, but it could have been very different. I'd have been sad not to have a serious relationship and/or children. But that wouldn't have made me 'odd'. Shame so many people seem to think otherwise.

Someone doesn't want to live their life exactly as I do ... what's wrong with them?

I thought the 'when are you having children?' questions we got fired at us were intrusive and indicative of very limited imagination, but this takes it up a notch.

What a great story ^ @Gazelda Thanks for sharing and opening your heart.

Sad start, but a lovely ending.

Shame on your friends and family for judging you and thinking you're gay (not that there is anything wrong with that!) just coz you were single for 10 -12 years. FFS, why is no-one allowed to be single???

That said, I think every single person who has spend longish spells single has had to tolerate the same shit!

My DH had never been in a relationship till he met me. He'd had a few dates from OLD but nothing stuck. He was in his mid 30s when we met. He is very good at being a husband and I'm glad I'm the one who snapped him up. He isn't and wasn't 'weird', just really shy.

Thoushall your friend doesn't sound like a lovely guy. He sounds like a conceited bellend

I find it odd that someone can be so flummoxed by he concept that someone would love to have children, but have not found a partner that they'd want to create those children with and, by association, subsequently have to spend an awful lot of time communicating with, whether in an ongoing relationship or not.

My great aunt as lovely as she was. Was always asking me.
Are you courting yet, Spider.
I always used to say no, regardless.
I mean I was hardly going discuss
my love life with my aunt.
Erm thankyou and good night.