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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

So who was wrong? Me or her? Asda aisle kerfuffle.

168 replies

user1498726699 · 16/07/2017 17:24

So standing in front of the face creams in Asda, deciding which one I wanted. I am not generally an aisle hogger and had been there all of 10 seconds, when a woman reaches in front of me to grab something, arm in face scenario.

I then say 'excuse you, if you'd just said excuse me, I would have moved out of your way. '

She then says 'oh, we all forget ourselves sometimes don't we?'

I then say 'yes, so it seems' and move off up the aisle.

She then loudly shouts at me 'stupid woman!' I reply 'and you.'

I then come across her (think she followed me) among the kale and broccoli, where she walks past me shouting down the aisle 'excuse me' giving me evils.

I say 'so, you found some manners then' and she flounces off.

I admit to be a bit hypervigilent around the store expecting my hair to be yanked or her imagined 7ft brick shit house son to accost me in the frozen section.

On relating this adrenaline fuelled event to DH back home, he said I shouldn't have said anything to her as she might have garrotted me, it was Asda after all.

So should we not correct people's bad manners for fear of violence then, so like irascible toddlers they think they can behave as they like?

OP posts:
NikiBabe · 16/07/2017 18:45

You....get a grip.

Christ must everyone treat you with impeccable manners or you rage at people.

Hotheadwheresthecoldbath · 16/07/2017 18:46

When someone does this to me I just say"nearly got me"and smile,it always gets an apology and smile back.
I also do apologize if I reach out as someone moves forward.

dementedma · 16/07/2017 18:46

the snobbish Asda comments are so very MN and unnecessary. Dh, DD and I were in Asda the other day. Between us we have 3 university degrees, (one first Class) , 3 jobs and all brought up with manners and decency. I have never, ever witnessed anything even remotely unpleasant in Asda..why all the horrible comments?

thecolonelbumminganugget · 16/07/2017 18:46

Brilliant! It's been a while since I actually laughed out loud at mumsnet! I'd loved to have seen this in real life, swap George for prada and it's desperate housewives!

She was rude, you were rude in response and took it too far, she reacted like a total legend

bimbobaggins · 16/07/2017 18:49

I don't like people doing this either so would have said something too so well done on saying something about it at the time!!Can't see what is wrong with Asda though, that's a bit uncalled for

BroomHandledMouser · 16/07/2017 18:51

I like Asda (or Asdas as my dear ole nana calls it Grin), I'd shop there more often if it wasn't right out the way

HemiDemiSemiquaver · 16/07/2017 18:56

I think you were just as rude, and probably started it. It's annoying to stand in front of the products, but it happens, because aisles are narrow. So sometimes you do reach in front of someone, usually saying excuse me, but also sometimes just quickly grabbing what you want so that they can keep on with their shopping. It's just as much an expectation that you could have moved and apologised when you realised you were blocking her way.

I definitely think the 'excuse you' bit was rude, as that sounds like you're a parent trying to deal with recalictrant offspring, and that's definitely rude to do to another adult, regardless of what you might think of them privately.

Saying that you'd have moved if she said excuse me just comes across as supercilious - she might have been thinking 'she could have apologised for standing in front of the products and moved', and wished she could have said that to you. Why not just be polite and move at that stage?! It's hardly going to delay you if she knew what she wanted, and it makes you more polite than her by not drawing attention to it and causing scenes that then continued throughout the shopping trip.

WitchyPoos · 16/07/2017 19:05

It was Asda after all

For that alone yabu. Very.

In certain situations you have to let these things slide. Small aisles and busy day in a supermarket. You caused a scene for fuck all.

UpYouGo · 16/07/2017 19:09

Some very serious posters on this thread Confused

I was contemplating which brand of baby wipes to buy once and a women came and stood right in front of me! I huffed, moved and stood in front of her. Victory!!

This was in Sainbury's though, so it ended there.

YANBU

TheLuminaries · 16/07/2017 19:12

Arguing in supermarket aisles sounds pretty rough and a poor example to children. I would British out by rolling my eyes and, if really riled, tutting slightly, then I would move on and let it go. You sound like you love a good public barney.

kali110 · 16/07/2017 19:14

You sound like a massive child.
You made things a 100% times worse.
Did you want an argument, as it seems like you just wanted to carry it on!

DoomGloomAndKaboom · 16/07/2017 19:15

lol at " it was Asda after all. "

I would have followed her and pinched the fucking face cream out of her trolley whilst she was tit deep in the kale.

But then I am very childish.

Redglitter · 16/07/2017 19:18

You made your point by commenting when she was rude. Pursuing it later in another aisle was plain childish. You sound as bad as each other. Although at least she doesn't sound such a bloody snob.

stonecircle · 16/07/2017 19:20

he said I shouldn't have said anything to her as she might have garrotted me, it was Asda after all.

Hmm
GirlOnATrainToShite · 16/07/2017 19:22

it was Asda after all

Grin
AwaywiththePixies27 · 16/07/2017 19:23

On relating this adrenaline fuelled event to DH back home, he said I shouldn't have said anything to her as she might have garrotted me, it was Asda after all.

😂 at your DH!

You were in the right. People who shove in front of me get the glare from me when I'm being polite. Otherwise they get a sarky comment. I mainly stick to online shopping these days.

GTFO my personal space!

AngeloftheSouth84 · 16/07/2017 19:24

it was Asda after all.

Well, I think you know the answer. If you go shopping in such places, expect the lowest of the low. You're lucky all you got was evil stares. Stay away from the drain cleaner aisle, you wouldn't want to come out with acid burns.

AwaywiththePixies27 · 16/07/2017 19:25

I regularly shop in Asda. I still found it funny . Maybe the others live in nicer areas where the Asda shoppers are as polite as the Waitrose shoppers OP? Wink

AwaywiththePixies27 · 16/07/2017 19:27

Pursuing it later in another aisle was plain childish.

Am I reading the same thread? The OP didnt pursue it in the next aisle. Face cream lady did didnt they? Confused

Bluntness100 · 16/07/2017 19:27

I do think there is a certain irony that you are being snobby about shopping in Asda, when not only are you the one shopping there, you're also the one having a fight in their aisles. It kind of lacks self awareness really,....when you're shouting at randoms in the aisles of Asda any subsequent snobbishness is rather amusing, because let's face it, it's kind of rough behavuour.

i swear the fridges emit arsehole vibes

This made me laugh out loud 😂

paxillin · 16/07/2017 19:28

Off to Asda, garrotting snobs Grin.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 16/07/2017 19:28

The best thing to do in these situations I think is just apologise for being in the way, she apologises for being in your way, you say not at all, apologise again and back away into her trolley. Then apologise to her trolley and move along.

That is the polite British policy Grin

MyNewBearTotoro · 16/07/2017 19:28

I think you were rude, and so she was rude back.

If you were stood blocking part of an aisle I don't think it's a big deal for her to reach in front of you and take something from the shelves. If she'd shoved you or pushed you out of the way that would be rude, equally if you'd only been there a second or two, but if you're standing at that shelf for 10+ seconds it's fair enough for her to reach across you to grab something.

Joinourclub · 16/07/2017 19:31

You sound very superior.

Life is too short to get annoyed at somebody reaching for the cheese.

abigamarone · 16/07/2017 19:32

I think deliberately 'correcting' someone's manners is far more uncouth than merely being unthinking.