Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not unpack his suitcase?

124 replies

BroomHandledMouser · 15/07/2017 14:01

We went away in June for four nights abroad. DH has yet to unpack his suitcase Confused

I've just returned from a friends house, and whilst I was talking about when to redecorate the room I mentioned that DH (the lazy bastard) hadn't managed to fully unpack his suitcase.

She was horrified and asked why I hadn't done it for him. I said that DH is a big boy and can do it himself.

She then remarked that he works all day I laughed and said we don't live in the 20's anymore. He works most weekends and sometimes late evenings, so I said he could do it when he had 5 minutes.

I work for DH but at home sorting invoices/payroll/etc. Now I'm looking st this case thinking shall I?

AIBU to leave it to him to sort? Am I satans sporn for not helping him out a little?

OP posts:
PopcornNRedwine · 15/07/2017 14:03

He can unpack his own case.

BossaDad · 15/07/2017 14:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Gemini69 · 15/07/2017 14:05

this is plain embarrassing... he can unpack his own case FFS

Original poster
BroomHandledMouser · 15/07/2017 14:05

Hmmm, not massive amounts. He might refill my wine glass or nip to the shop but nothing in the way of household shite

OP posts:
Original poster
BroomHandledMouser · 15/07/2017 14:06

Her face was brilliant! Like I'd murdered a cute animal or something!

OP posts:
Tiptoethr0ughthetulips · 15/07/2017 14:06

A small suitcase has been under my bedroom mirror since April when my husband used it for a weekend away. I am damn well not emptying it. It is however really annoying me.
Do not empty it! He's a grown man fgs.

RebornSlippy · 15/07/2017 14:11

How many hours a week do you work OP?

RebornSlippy · 15/07/2017 14:11

For the business I mean.

Original poster
BroomHandledMouser · 15/07/2017 14:13

I'd say on average around 25-30, depends on how busy we get.

I have enough time to do it, but I'd never really thought about it doing until she mentioned it! I just look at it, tut, and get on with my day

OP posts:
Original poster
BroomHandledMouser · 15/07/2017 14:14

Fully prepared to be told IABU btw, just curious about opinions Smile

OP posts:
oakleaffy · 15/07/2017 14:17

I'd not unpack it...you aren't his mum.
Also...my son came round to collect his old airport luggage bag that was stored in his old bedroom...he said ''this is heavy?''..unzipped it , reached in and pulled out a pile of old ''lads mags'' from years ago.
He was so embarrassed and said 'noo...not in front of my mum!''...

After that, I'd never want to unpack anyone's luggage for fear of what I might find :)

whatdoessheknow · 15/07/2017 14:17

Personally I often do stuff like that for DH, but then I expect him to go over and above for me in other areas.
You sound quite resentful of him in general, or it wouldn't be an issue.

Deux · 15/07/2017 14:17

Oh no, don't do it or you may set a dangerous precedent of expectation.

Then he'll be expecting you to pack it for him.

I do virtually all the domestic stuff but I've always refused to pack/unpack. In fact I keep tripping over an unpacked case that DH hasn't put into the loft.

RebornSlippy · 15/07/2017 14:18

Honestly, if my other half was working evening and weekends and I had the time I'd have to just empty the fecking thing. For myself. No way could I leave it for weeks lying around like that. Are there dirty clothes inside? More importantly, is he always this lazy?

dementedpixie · 15/07/2017 14:19

I unpack all the suitcases as they normally have mixed clothing in and I like to sort out the dirty washing. Is it all just his stuff?

Groupie123 · 15/07/2017 14:20

My DH unpacks for me as I often forget. But I do stuff for him too. If he doesn't do anything for you then YANBU

ConstanceCraving · 15/07/2017 14:21

He's works everyday, most weekends and sometimes late?

Christ alive, I'm with your mate.

WyfOfBathe · 15/07/2017 14:21

I would do it. It only takes a couple of minutes and would stop me getting annoyed every time I look at it. But I know that he would do the same for me if I hadn't had time to unpack mine.

museumum · 15/07/2017 14:21

It wouldn't occur to me to open and go through any bag of dh's. Unless I needed something out of it or he asked me to get something.
I don't think we're particularly secretive but we just take care of our own stuff.

Original poster
BroomHandledMouser · 15/07/2017 14:21

Do I sound resentful? I don't mean to be, he's a decent bloke all round but yes he's pretty lazy. I've no idea what's in the case I haven't looked 😂

OP posts:
RebornSlippy · 15/07/2017 14:22

For those of you who mention it is acceptable to unpack unless you are being repaid by him doing things for the OP. Does working long days (including weekends) to fund holidays count?

vEGANvERA · 15/07/2017 14:22

reminds me of a "everyone loves raymond" episode
he left suitcase on stairs and it was a stand off situation
next time he needed to go away he went with a plastic bag lol

RebornSlippy · 15/07/2017 14:23

*unacceptable

SheSaidHeSaid · 15/07/2017 14:24

At this point I would have unpacked it because I'd be sick of seeing it and he's obviously in no hurry to do it. Really though he should have done it by now.

MargotLovedTom1 · 15/07/2017 14:26

He sometimes works seven days a week with/or late evening finishes? Yeah, I'd probably unpack it tbh.
Agree with RebornSlippy apart from the last sentence. Sounds like he works his bollocks off rather than being lazy.