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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

How many children would you have ideally?

222 replies

AWitchCalledMeg · 10/07/2017 19:54

I mean ideally as in no time/age/money/fertility/cultural conventions/partner/lack of support etc barriers. How many would you have/have had?
For me.. about 6 or 7. I have two and one on way but have always loved the idea of big family.

OP posts:
GardenGeek · 10/07/2017 21:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

happyfanjosephine · 10/07/2017 21:46
  1. I have two but money and sole breadwinner mean no more SAHH not interested and we can't afford it anyway.
phoenix1973 · 10/07/2017 21:47
  1. My barriers are age, financial and an emotionally unsupportive partner.
I have one.
SugarMiceInTheRain · 10/07/2017 21:49

When we first got married I wanted 5 or 6. Once we had 2 I had a rethink. Number 3 was a happy surprise but I am well and truly done now. My mental health couldn't cope with the number of children I thought I wanted!

SugarMiceInTheRain · 10/07/2017 21:49

When we first got married I wanted 5 or 6. Once we had 2 I had a rethink. Number 3 was a happy surprise but I am well and truly done now. My mental health couldn't cope with the number of children I thought I wanted!

OhDearToby · 10/07/2017 21:49

Four. I just had number three. Giving it a few years before we go for number four though as I'm bloody knackered!

cakesandphotos · 10/07/2017 21:50

I always wanted 4 or 5. Then I became a nanny to 4 children and now I want 2. And no twins please!

OhTheRoses · 10/07/2017 21:52

We wanted four. Managed two after three second trimester and beyond tragedies. Lost count of the early miscarriages. Have an auto immune disease better understood now.

Had a large house and were on our way to being as rich as croesious. Life sucks - would have loved in a cardboard box to have the babies back.

MimsyFluff · 10/07/2017 21:56

I'd have five we have three but hopefully we will start TTC for number four in five years may have number five a year later but I'll have to see how tiring been an older mother is first Grin

TheweewitchRoz · 10/07/2017 21:56

At least 4, but ideally 6 (have 3 Smile).

MadameJosephine · 10/07/2017 21:56

The 2 I have is perfect

Blossomdeary · 10/07/2017 21:58

I wanted 6. Back troubles in 3rd pregnancy put a stop to that. I just had to love the three we had twice as much.

user7680 · 10/07/2017 21:59

Always wanted Judy one girl and I've got her Smile

mummy2oneandtwo · 10/07/2017 22:00

Wanted one girl, had twin boys Grin
Wouldn't change them for the world though and could be tempted to have another in the future....maybe...

DavetheCat2001 · 10/07/2017 22:00

I have 2, a boy and a girl which I feel blessed with. had my DD at 40 so already an older mother, I think I could possibly squeeze another one out, but OH and I have decided 2 is probably enough, and we're old and knackered already!

user7680 · 10/07/2017 22:01

Just

missiondecision · 10/07/2017 22:01

Never ever considered how many dc I'd have.
I have 6. It's both fantastic and shit sometimes.
That said I love them so much I could burst with pride with love sometimes.

Riversleep · 10/07/2017 22:02

When I was younger, I wanted 4. I have 2 and now I've had them, Ideally I'd have wanted one more but Im too old and DH is dead against it Sad

BabyHamster · 10/07/2017 22:04

We have one. I think I'd like three ideally, but I think we'll probably stop at two.

UrsulaPandress · 10/07/2017 22:05
  1. I have one.
TwoBusyCnuts · 10/07/2017 22:06

A lot of DHs seem to want one or two, but not more than that. Why?

SolomanDaisy · 10/07/2017 22:07

Before I started trying to have children I thought I'd like to have loads of kids. Then when I had fertility problems I just focused on getting one. Then after having one I realised I would never have coped with loads anyway. We have two and that is just right!

flownthecoopkiwi · 10/07/2017 22:08

2 and I have one boy and one girl

Firenight · 10/07/2017 22:08

The only real barrier is exhaustion and emotional reserves. I have two and would have another happily if there was more of me to share.

Xoticdreamz · 10/07/2017 22:09

I have 3 but 10 year age gap between 2nd and 3rd . I would have liked to have had a 4 th not that long after my 3rd as it's almost as if he is an only child . However he is 9 now and I can't imagine going back to all the hard work early child rearing entails.