To let this irritate me hugely??

[lovehoney69]

Hi!!i have a dp of just over a year (not dc's dad) who does something that is beginning to REALLY wind me up. Whenever I do something I do something he disapproves of eg eating too much, having a chocolate when friends offer one, watching a program he dislikes etc he will say sharply "ah-ah"
Like the sort of sound you make to a young toddler who's about to eat a coin or touch the fire. I find it ridiculously irritating and have explained many times that I feel like he's treating me like a small child when he does it. He does shrugs and says I'm being silly. Last night he did it because I was pulling a tag off a new item of clothing and I lost the plot and shouted "fuck off with the ah-ah's!!!" (Yes not my finest hour I admit!!) now he's sulking and demanding I apologise for my uncalled for outburst. So AIBU to get so wound up by this? Would you?

He sounds like a condescending twat.

Er YES

I mean NO you are definitelg not bu!

Next time he tries to walk in your house say 'ah-ah' and slam the door on the fucker.

And keep it shut.

Omg that would send me crazy!
He sounds very arrogant.

Yanbu imo. He sounds really patronising.

I know I'm supposed to say ah-ah you shouldn't have sworn at him and, in an ideal world, I'm sure you wouldn't have, but I probably would have ended up saying the same thing.

Er... I'm not joking - I would have dumped him for this.

I have a pet peever of being 'shushed'.

My DH did it once - I told him in no uncertain terms he was never to do that again. He didn't. That was 12 years ago.

Umm... from another angle. Where is your DP originally from ? Some people of African heritage/ families use certain expressions; from my dads side of the family , they will use "Heyyyyyyyy" when in shock, "Ah ah" when something disappoints them.

He sounds really immature. I wouldn't apologise in this situation because if you keep prodding a sleeping cat sooner or later it'll get up and scratch you and you only have yourself to blame for it. I'd also be wary about him disapproving of you eating too much. Feels a tad like the start of some sort of controlling tendency.

Hate throwing this phrase around but I'd be thinking of LTB to be frank.

Jengr

How on earth have you managed a year with that happening?! A week in and I would have tossed him to the curb

Oooooo he would be out on his arse!

Fwiw I don't think you overacted at all x

Jengr that really made me laugh!!
Notgivingin..... He's from Wales, is it a "thing" there do you think?
Thanks everybody glad it's not just me.

Man I feel irritated just reading that. It must be driving you insane

I wouldn't apologise for exploding but I would be having a come to Jesus conversation with him when you're calm and hammer that point home.

I want to smack him for you. Just reading your post has really wound me up.

Don't smack him though, violence is not the answer!

Nope, that's not on. You're an adult, who is he to judge you? Ah ah him back every time he does it to you and tell him why, or dump him.

Next time he tries to walk in your house say 'ah-ah' and slam the door on the fucker.

And keep it shut.

^This!

He should apologise for being a patronising pillock.

Both the noticing what I ate/ feeling the need to comment and the noise itself would drive me mad. I don't know which is worse.

He sounds like a complete knob tbh

YANBU - this would drive me insane!! Who does he think he is talking to you like youre a kid?!

Jengr

Fuck that, I'm not a child!

If a man EVER made that obnoxious noise to be I'd stuff a sock down his throat. What a condescending ASSHOLE. Seriously, tell him to fuck off and get rid.

Nope. Could not be doing with that.

Hate patronising comments so much. DH has a slight tendency towards them - early in our relationship he used to do a patronising tap on my knee thing that really grated, I made it clear and he stopped. Now he does sometimes greet me or comment on things in a bit of a patronising tone - it grates - I often blank it - but also try to breathe and think of it as his attempt to be endearing and connect with me.