Would you leave pretty bratty 14 yr old girl alone regularly with decent-looking young male piano teacher with no visible mention of partner?

[Evelight]

Well would you? Or is my mind screwed up by Nabakov and The Police etc etc during my impressionable years?

So is she pretty and bratty, or just pretty bratty? That could be key here.

This thread is enormously insulting. I am a music teacher, as is my boyfriend, and most of my friends. It's hugely damaging to us as professionals to suggest that we cannot be left alone with a child. We are not working in people's houses because we are 'desperate for money' we do it because it is convenient for us and for the child who doesn't want to miss their school lessons. And to whoever suggested the doors are always left open when we work in schools, imagine if trumpet lessons took place with the doors open! There would soon be complaints. What a load of nonsense.

I'm suprised any adult 'allows' themselves to be alone with a child. In fact I think it's policy at schools that children in 1:1 lessons are taught with the door open. This prevents both malicious accusations as well as providing the child with easy access to remove themselves if they feel uncomfortable.
I'm the scenario you describe OP I would probably stay in a chaperone role. Aside from anything else, if the child was prone to "brattyness" they might not play up as much with their Mum on the sofa.

Professorhannigan - I'll say it again, you cannot teach a music lesson with the doors open! Anytime I've tried (becsuse the room is too hot, for example), I've had to shut it because of complaints that the sound carries.

And to whoever suggested the doors are always left open when we work in schools, imagine if trumpet lessons took place with the doors open! There would soon be complaints. What a load of nonsense.

it is not "nonsense, it is absolutely non negotiable.

Evert teacher knows never to be alone with a child with the door shut. Music rooms normally have a half glass wall, if they don't, the door has to stay open. No teacher with an ounce of common sense would be alone with a child at home either.

Very basic good practice.

I'm suprised any adult 'allows' themselves to be alone with a child. In fact I think it's policy at schools that children in 1:1 lessons are taught with the door open.

Not in my school. It's impossible because of noise travel.

Professorhannigan - I'll say it again

lineintexas -I'll say it again. It isn't an option or choice, you HAVE to be clearly seen, anything else is gross misconduct, sackable, and very very stupid.

Music lessons were always taught with door closed when I was at school 12 years ago but maybe things have moved on since then.

They are suppose to have a half glass door- doesn't always happen though, especially in primary schools.

Are we in a Shakespeare play?

I've read a lot of Tudor bodice rippers. And this reminds me of Catherine Howard's (Hvii; wife v) first liasion with a young attractive piano teacher.
I know that was 500 years ago but it didn't end well for poor Catherine

laineintexas

It is not hugely insulting. It is best practice, based on the experience of those of us who work in education and, for example, have had to deal with the terrible aftermath of a plausible, charming, well respected, CRB checked adult abusing young children "in plain sight".

Yes, you may need to have the doors closed for a music lesson in a private house. But at the very least, the parent should be on hand and it should be accepted that the parent might enter the room at any minute.

Do you have any safeguarding training? Have you sat through the NSPCC training detailing some of the cases where e.g. headteachers have been able to continue unchallenged because they were supposedly above suspicion? It's not actually about you or your partner. It's about protecting children from the minority of predators. Who exist in every profession and every walk of life. Tragically.

When I was at school there were a few instances of male teachers having affairs with female pupils. Surprised at the number of posters reacting with extreme outrage as if they've never heard of such a thing.

This thread is enormously insulting. I am a music teacher, as is my boyfriend, and most of my friends. It's hugely damaging to us as professionals to suggest that we cannot be left alone with a child.

For the love of God, she's not casting aspersions on music teachers but is expressing concern about what her DD might do.

I'm sorry that music teachers are insulted by the idea that another music teacher might be abusive. Unfortunately some adults are abusing children and safeguarding procedures do need following.

Any kind of 1 to 1 tuition leaves the child vulnerable as well as the adult vulnerable to false allegations which is why schools should have glass doors for any room where a child might be alone with an adult.

Just because some schools don't do this doesn't mean it shouldn't be the case. I wouldn't risk being alone in a room with a child with a closed door and no glass panel.

If the OP is serious about the question then I suggest she stays in the room and reads quietly.

Serfterf - the OP might not be but others certainly have.

Bishybarneybee - I've had safeguarding training every year. I know not what to do, but the schools sometimes still make us teach in rooms with no window in the door. Space is at a premium in primary schools, and sometimes there isn't enough room. I agree it's not right, but I can't demand space if they choose to allocate it elsewhere.

And clearly all these measures still don't stop the accusations, so we're damned either way!

Wtf??????

It's still unclear to me whether the OP meant pretty looking and also bratty or pretty bratty. I suppose that's by the by though. From the OP's second post it reads like she is concerned that the tutor will try it on with the pupil.

Does this mean if I book piano lessons with a handsome young teacher I get to have sex with him? I didn't realise that was an option. I assumed they would just teach piano.

I don't think OP is coming back. We will never know if the child is pretty bratty or pretty and bratty. Sad.

This idea that any professional adult who is alone with a child = a sackable offence as one poster put out is funny. I agree there is best practice and it's there for a reason but I work in a job where as part of my monitoring I have to tick that I have seen children alone and if I don't tick that box enough senior managers eventually start wondering why.

Sackable offence!

Regarding the original question though, and notwithstanding some of the bizarre points the OP makes, it is fair to think about such things and make decisions with eyes open.

Does this 14 year old not go to school?
Or is just piano teachers that are the problem?
I grew up in the 90's too. I get worried about my dcs going wondering about in the middle of the night looking for a river of dreams.

Confused dot com

Latecomer here. Can someone tell me what's going on please?

No point asking questions, the OP has left the thread.