To feel a bit shit that nobody sponsored me?

[MyGastIsFlabbered]

I signed up to do the 10,000 steps a day thing for Cancer Research. I put my fundraising page on FB, Twitter but not one person has sponsored me. I know money's tight for most of us at the moment, but to not raise even a penny makes me feel shit. AIBU to take it so personally?

I haven't ignored it at all. I got defensive because it felt like people were basically saying 'what you're doing is shit, who the fuck do you think you are?' Of course that's not what was said at all but because of my MH problems that's how I felt. I realise I've gone about this thread all wrong and I'm just coming across as a slightly hysterical loon. I (wrongly) thought that doing this challenge would be a good way to raise much needed funds to combat cancer. I'm disappointed that it hasn't got the response I'd hoped for, but I'm disappointed because of my failure to raise money not because I wanted lots of pats on the back.

Your last post OP is more reasonable than many of your other ones.

You're disappointed you've not raised funds. People have explained why.
Where you've gone wrong is telling people it is a massive challenge in the face of people saying not all personal challenges are worth sponsoring.

Ultimately, fundraising and sponsorship is done for bigger things. If you want to raise for charity, set yourself a direct debit

YANBU to feel disappointed at not getting sponsors. Sponsorship requests are just too constant and YABU to think that your challenge would appear significant to others even if it is to yourself. I would never sponsor someone for 10,000 steps - I have mild chronic fatigue from an old bout of glandular fever and manage 10,000 steps most days.

Blimey, this thread took a bit of a turn and I think MyGast is getting an unnecessarily hard time, she's taking part in an organised event, she didn't wake up one day and arbitrarily decide to ask for sponsorship.
If people think it's not a worthy enough goal, then take it up with the charity*, they decided on the event.
www.cancerresearchuk.org/support-us/find-an-event/walk-all-over-cancer#fundraisingaccordion5

The point isn't about the difficulty of the task, if I were doing a sponsored event and not one of my friends made a token donation, or even acknowledged my effort with a "sorry I can't sponsor you but good luck with it", then I'd feel pretty dejected about that. Wouldn't most people, despite understanding that there are a lot of different good causes and pressures on people's wallets?

• obviously don't, that would be pretty twatty.

FrenchDucksSayCoinCoin
I think these sponsored everything's are starting to have a negative effect on fundraising because the charities (or some) are running national TV adverts encouraging people to be sponsored for not doing much.

It's very easy to be charitable when asking for other people to part with their cash.

I'll happily put a couple of quid into things but don't get into this online sponsors etc because I'm more than happy supporting the charities my church links to, buying for the food bank and donating to some of the students who are doing stuff. But I won't be made to feel guilty by people for not slinging them a fiver for growing a moustache or avoiding beer for a few days

Maisy I agree with you that sponsorship fatigue is a very real thing. No, you absolutely shouldn't feel guilty either, no one can give to everything they are asked about (well, I suppose there might be some millionaire hermits that could, but I'm not acquainted with anyone like that), and what causes we choose are personal, we all have different drivers.

If people think it's not a worthy enough goal, then take it up with the charity, they decided on the event*

It really doesn't matter what the charity thinks of it, its whether people find it something they want to sponsor. And they don't.

I get what people are saying that there a lot of charities and you can't sponsor all of them and also about the challenge involved BUT...I recently did a sponsored thing and didn't feel well sponsored either and I did feel dejected because at the end of the day it was for a good cause and when I looked around and saw what other people were spending on tickets (some an enormous amount) etc for leisure events elsewhere it seemed a bit sad that they couldn't spare a fiver for this charity. I too felt disappointed and don't do many charity events so expected a little more support, I totally get where you're coming from.

I wouldn't sponsor anyone doing 10,000 steps, unless it was a big achievement for them. I feel that if you are doing sonething to raise money, by sponsorship, it should be something difficult, arduous, needing training etc. A friend just ran 4 marathons each in a different country. A huge deal. I sponsored him.

Yeah that's fine Nottalotta but as a single parent with 2 small children, a part time job and no disposable income how exactly am I to train for anything? That's part of the reason I chose to take part in this event, it was something I could do which, whilst a challenge to me, isn't totally unachievable like a trip to Everest base camp would be.

Prospero, she actually has raised funds because people have sifted through the horrible posts where people are saying it's not an achievement etc and messaged her to donate.

She doesn't have to do something you find really adventurous like some sort of performing monkey in order to raise the money. If one of my friends did something for charity, however small, I would support them with it.

I did feel dejected because at the end of the day it was for a good cause and when I looked around and saw what other people were spending on tickets (some an enormous amount) etc for leisure events elsewhere it seemed a bit sad that they couldn't spare a fiver for this charity

More judgemental do-goodery. Stop putting people down for not supporting what YOU have decided is a good cause. There is every chance they give a lot more to charity than you do.

@Nancy91 thank you.

And thanks to this thread I've now been sponsored by some lovely MNers and have raised over £50 so feel bloody awesome.

I'm actually starting to think the event itself is immaterial, if it's a cause close to your heart and you can afford it, you'll sponsor whether it's 10k a day, sitting in a bath of baked beans or shaving your head/growing a beard etc etc. If it's not a cause you care about or you're ethically opposed to (e.g. animal testing in cancer research) you won't. Maybe it really is that simple. I don't know.

I don't give to CRUK because of how little they designated to paediatric cancers unless you specify it's for the children and teens part of their charity, which friends of mine had to lobby for. But I'd just not sponsor is all.

expat I absolutely agree. I never sponsor CRUK for exactly the same reason. If I want to give to cancer charities I give to specialist ones. I don't give to breast cancer charities either as I feel that money has gone to them at the expense of cancer charities who need the money more. As horrific as breast cancer is the chances are that if you are diagnosed with it you are highly likely to either be cured or your cancer be controlled. If you are diagnosed with pancreatic cancer you'll almost certainly die. I believe that this is because it doesn't have the profile of breast cancer and has therefore been left to languish in terms of funding. I Would like to see a much bigger focus on cancers which have really poor survival rates and I don't feel that CRUK are transparent enough about this

Yanbu. 10k steps is a 'thing' thats been introduced as a fundraiser isn't it? I work with someone who is doing it and I'm sure it's an event they are plugging themselves, like race for life Is? I may be wrong. Even if I am, yasnbu for feeling a bit shit that nobody has sponsored you, it's not a nice feeling I'm sure!

Yes it's a thing thought out by Cancer Research it's not something I just woke up and decided to do one day.

I think that pancreatic cancer has a much higher mortality rate is partly because it's so hard to detect at an early stage; it's almost already too late once it's diagnosed. Breast and testicular cancer are relatively easy to pick up early on. But I could be wrong.

I hope you'll do the daily 10k anyway, for your own sake.

Lots,of people have charity challenge fatigue, like the lady from Bristol before the elections:"what?! Not another one?!!!!"'

Too many people do this now....

We are at peak charity challenge imo

Not your fault.

Therealslimshady1
I agree. Do the 10,000 steps because it's a hood healthy lifestyle choice and enjoy it for what it is.

People are entitled to select whichever charity they wish to give to, but it's unreasonable to expect others to fund that choice via sponsorship, IMO. Diagnostic rates, treatment rates and survival rates are often improved by funding, so some select to donate to charities that focus on particular cancers. CRUK uses children a lot in their advertising, but unless you specify, then very little of what they raise goes towards paediatric cancers so I don't fund them for that reason.

I actually refuse to watch any of their adverts featuring children, and my own surviving children turn the channel when they come on or mute them for me. My child died from a cancer that is known to strike 'the elderly', age 55+, but accounts for 20% of leukaemias in childhood. As a paed cancer, it has a much lower OS, and is notoriously underfunded. She was treated with drugs 30 years old. They weakened her young organs and were complicit in her premature death and the treatment protocol directly killed the children of several friends of mine. So no, I don't sponsor for CRUK and if people take offense at that, it's their lookout. I fund for better treatments, newer treatments, for those children, and for all children with cancer, and research into them. A quarter of all children treated for cancer will go on to develop secondary cancers, many also relapse and so many of them do not respond to treatment, not to mention, many are left with lifelong disabilities as the result of their treatment.

@MyGastIsFlabbered at 16:50 I gave you (what I think!) is some good great advice.

Tell your story and inspire donations - even done to why the challenge is a challenge for you.

I hope you can find the FUN in fundraising again.

Why does your self esteem depend on how much money other people give to charity?

for you expat

Sorry you feel upset OP. I can understand why, but for me it's the case that so many people lately have asked for sponsorship (5 or 6 in the last month). They are all worthy Causes, , but I ended up feeling so overwhelmed by all the requests that I didn't sponsor anyone at all.

TBH I take the view that I choose to support one or two charities that mean a lot to me, and donate regularly to them. If everyone did the same, then their chosen charities would benefit. If I feel I have to divert those donations to other charities via sponsorship, my preferred charities will miss out.