AIBU to think DH may be having an affair??

[Autvet]

Asking because I can't get my head round this.... please help!! DH works away a lot, nice hotels etc ... emptying his trousers for washing this evening ( yep I'm living the dream) & found his room paper key for yesterday's hotel stay - no of people on room is 2 confused.... he called me to say hi last night but from the hotel gardens as reception 'awful' in hotel room.... am I being suspicious or is it deserved?? Really want to call hotel as I've kept room key etc but how can I find out how many people stayed etc etc ?? Any ideas ?? sad

I'm not sure why everyone is bashing Onion. I said exactly the same last night.
OP admitted that she has previously gone through his phone.
I didn't know having dinner with someone meant you had sex with them.

Whatever Ilove

redshoeblueshoe but are you a man? For some reason that means your point is void on this subject

I don't think that locking a phone with a password is suspicious at all. I have never thought to ask DH for his password for anything. Why would I need it?

Lying about it usually does

Middleclass - there seems to be a whole bunch of men moaning on here about OP checking, having the audacity to do the washing and finding a room card AND in addition finding every excuse under the sun to put OP down and make this sound like paranoia on the part of OP

This is NOT supportive behaviour.

Onion - I am glad you find this amusing. I don't.

Ilovemybabygirls I assure you they're not all men!

Some real bullshit being posted on here

If my husband demanded my phone I'd tell him where to go in no uncertain terms. He could fuck right off.

As for hotels needing to know for fire regulations, many a time I've booked a hotel or had one booked for me and the hotel erroneously puts two people if it's a double. They don't come and audit your room at bed time. And sometimes I eat breakfast sometimes I don't, like plenty others I decide in the morning. Plenty of times I stay In a country house hotel for work. It's location that's critical.

However as said, the two salads is weird.

As for the op, yes I suspect she is a snooper. She said she once ohoned the hotel to ask if their wifi was good in their rooms, when he had said he had called her from outside due to poor wifi. That's unusual behaviour. She clearly doesn't trust him. Whether that's because he isn't trust worthy or she is paranoid none of us know.

Oh so the posters trying to offer different opinions must be men?

Okay then

"A few years ago I found a text on his phone to a woman he worked with... asking what hotel room she was in :-((... he said he was popping to see her as a friend and got really angry with me ;-( .... I don't know what to think TBH"

On top of that and all her recent findings I think she has reason to be suspicious plus being glued to his phone with a passcode she doesn't know. I get the impression from the op she feels if she doesn't provide evidence she will be made to feel she is imagining it.

Op, hope you get to the bottom of it.

Middleclass - hmm....

Onion - you are a man though, and your view is one that is not supportive of OP ....not sure why you are confused.

Are you hard of thinking Ilove? I'm not the only poster being 'not supportive' as you put it.

Onion - I think we should focus on OP and not on you.

ilove why does onions opinion need to be supportive? I don't agree with him having to hand his phone over just too ease her insecurities.

My guess is she's always snooped and he over the years has learnt what he can and can't say. Otherwise it would lead to an interrogation and him being spied on.

Sometimes I will use DH's phone to text DS or google something if my phone is charging or dead. As he does mine. We have no problem with this.

That's fine if you are both happy but I don't think it is something that is therefore necessary for everyone. My mobile phone takes about 5 minutes to have enough charge for a text, we have landline for longer phonecalls anyway, computer for googling etc.

Ilovemybabygirls then stop talking about onions and what others should or shouldn't post. No one has been awful to the op from what I've seen, just warned her not to get caught up in the Marple stuff or how they would feel about their phone being checked or given her another view! Surely just hearing one view isn't helpful!

kunfu - that is your view. We are chilled in our house about phones and it works for all of us. No interrogation needed funnily enough.

Middleclass - there have been literally hundreds of points of view, Op is not short on advice. but it is offensive to call someone a snooper and paranoid end of. Lets focus on OP shall we.

It was unkind and im sorry for being so blunt.

Thing is. The op has rung a hotel before based just on the fact he said he had bad reception at the hotel. That in its self is not normal. For her to jump to the conclusion atraight away suggest to me she worries over it alot and may be grilling her dh over other things. Maybe hes angry because of her past behaviour of examining him all the time.

I am sorry op that you are obviousely hurting. How is he in thebrest of the relationship.

Navy - good point.

ilove the pleasure you seem to be taking in the op's situation is seriously ugly.