WIBU to have DS's known as name at school as 'Bear'?

[JacobLuke]

DS is called Jacob. He always got called Bear Cub (ending of Jacob is a bit like cub) and now just Bear really. He goes by Bear at swimming

WIBU?

YABU.

Bear is a sweet, informal, loving nickname you have for him because your relationship is sweet and loving and for want of a better word 'informal'.

School, even in reception, is a fairly formal place. There are rules to follow and teachers are to be treated in a different way to family and friends. He might call you adults friends Dave and Sue, at school it's Mr Smith and Mrs Jones, for example.

Let him benefit from having two names. One for formal occasions i.e. school (on reports and work and his peg etc.) or when he is in real trouble and you need to 'proper name' him and one for casual, loving use (with family and friends).

I don't think you should. Kids like to move on from their nicknames. I e taught Billy's, Bobbys, Tommys and Jonnys who have become Bill Bob Tom and Jon.

Yanbu

It's fine. Ds1 had a Bear at school, 10 years ago.

How does he introduce himself? Ask him what he would like to be called and use that.

The other children won't laugh at him, they'll think it's a great name. They will also make fun of his name by Y4, but they'll do that with everyone. Mary, Mary, anyone...?

none of the Teddys in the world get laughed at!

Bollocks! My nephew is Teddy and gets the piss taken out of him a lot at school.

Use his real name. Bear is cute when he's 4, he might not like it so much when he's older.

I teach a number of students who ask to go by nicknames, but they are all derivatives of their actual name in some way - Flick for Felicity, Matty for Matilda, and so on. I also have a quite few Mohammeds who are known by their middle name, which tends to be more "western".

I don't understand why anyone thinks it would be unreasonable for him to be known as Bear at school. Some children are actually called Bear you know...it's a name!

OP, if he usually goes by Bear, he's used to it and he likes it, of course it's ok for him to continue to go by Bear at school.

Lots of people go by a shortening of their name, a middle name or a nickname.

I'd do it. I've just completed a form for DD to start school in September that asked for her legal name, the name she likes to be known by and the name that should go on her peg etc. so it's hardly unusual. There was a boy when I was at school who was called Bunny for everything. His real name had nothing to do with it.

YANBU if that's what he would prefer. I know that by 4yo DS was very set that he wanted to be called by the shortening of his name and not the full version.

We call ds "boo" at home, never thought to get school to call him that too, do you think it's too late now he's 13?

Keep Bear as an affectionate name at home.

Not a problem but do stick with it. I once had a pupil whose mum asked me to call her Teddy which was nothing remotely connected to her given name. All fine. But before the year was out child wanted to be known by actual name. Still fine but all her schoolmates had come to know her as Teddy (she was new to the school). I mean no one died but it was not easy to get other children to adopt the 'new' name and I think the child herself was a bit confused. This was Year 3.

There are two boys in my son's class who are known by totally different names to their birth names and it doesn't seem confusing to the children or anyone else. I say let him decide what he wants everyone to call him... he can always change his mind in any case.

is this about Cheryl Cole ?? I'm confused

My cousin has a very unusual nickname, when he started school my aunt had to ask the school to call him by the nickname because he would not answer to his real name. As an adult he had his name changed legally so that his nickname rather than real name would be used in his wedding ceremony. He is about 46 now, if anyone were to refer to him by his real name we wouldn't know who they were talking about!

I absolutely thought you were joking. Yes you would BU. My son is called Ollie and he gets called Ollie bolly or boo but I wouldn't ask his teachers to call him boo.. What is wrong with kids just being called their names?

Names at registration should be real names. If his friends choose to call him bear that's up to them but expecting teachers to call him bear is just silly.

My son is known as 'Bub' by my whole family and lots of our friends. Has done ever since he was a toddler. He's a teenager now and it's still what he's happy to go by. But he uses his given name at school- wouldn't dream of doing otherwise. So YABVU.

Yes, YABU. If he wants his friends to call him Bear, then they can do that on a nickname basis. My son has a similar "sort of linked to his name but actually not really" nickname ("Robot") and I'd not be impressed if his teachers called him that. It's a pet name, and I think it would be very unprofessional of them to do so.

Ask him.

I suppose the difference between some of the examples are my son goes by Bear at swimming, etc.

Judydreamsofhorses
Agreed. I had to apologise to a parent for a letter getting out late because I didn't teach an Alexandra. Her preferred name was on the register and I didn't twig because I'd only known her by the diminutive (no it wasn't Alex, not that silly! ). Mum said that she wanted the child to have the option of names when they got older.

Also had a few Muhammed's who go by their middle names like you. They're Muhammed on the register but never called it.

I'm sure you have his best interests at heart, so keep it real, and go with if.
Could you also ask your DS ?

YABU

Bear is a family nickname for a preschooler

Known as should be for if you use middle name instead of first names or a shortening of a name, not for pet names

As a teacher, I'd be wanting to know why you were insisting. It comes across as very pretentious. Keep baby names for home.