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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To complain about screaming teachers

156 replies

user1498071458 · 21/06/2017 20:00

Since DD went to secondary school she has been complaining about teachers "screaming."

According to her, when a child gets in trouble they are screamed at.

At first I ignored this but it's really starting to unsettle DD.

WIBU to ask to speak to someone about it?

OP posts:
Piggywaspushed · 21/06/2017 22:06

How/ why are you defending her? She hasn't been accused of anything , it seems.

Sometimes shouting is actually very warranted.

echt · 21/06/2017 22:06

Well if you have video evidence, then you're going to need to show it.

PortiaCastis · 21/06/2017 22:07

I'm sure the teacher allowed herself to be filmed Hmm

Piggywaspushed · 21/06/2017 22:08

I think we all want to know how you have seen this video - since your DD doesn't have a phone!

If the school find out that they have made a viral appearance on social media, more shouting will ensue!

MaisyPops · 21/06/2017 22:08

Maybe user she's a perfectly reasonable person (as you've said) and actually this is about the 6th time in the last week she's been called to deal with an issue from the same class/group of students.

If I look at my behaviour list for the last fortnight it's the same 6-7 ring leaders and then there's the followers who are nice enough but encourage it because short term it's funny. I went into one class every day this week. Every time same thing, class quiet for me and then I'm back removing students for their attitude to their class teacher. Of course today's class talk (poat ring leader removal) was sterner aka "you each have a decision to make. Are you going to be complicit in destroying learning or are you going to realise your parents would be mortified if I asked Miss for a list of bystanders and called them? Your choice. You're nice kids so make the correct choice".

Would some people say I was too stern, maybe. But that class teacher needs supporting and those bystanders need to stop acting like a captive audience for shocking behaviour.

SmileEachDay · 21/06/2017 22:09

The teacher had agreed to the assembly being filmed and posted on fb?

Is that what you are saying?

Ecclesiastes · 21/06/2017 22:12

Thank Christ I don't have to teach anymore.

Anyone would scream, faced with hordes of idiot fucking parents and their ghastly offspring*

*Not you, OP. I'm sure you're lovely.

MaisyPops · 21/06/2017 22:14

Somehow smile I'm sensing some burning pants on fire.

The thread was clearly meant to get a "mean nasty teachers shouted" response.

What's actually happened is a really sensible discussion that doesn't just take "my child says / I saw one thing on Facebook that was inappropriately recorded therefore everything my daughter says" as gospel.

Original poster
user1498071458 · 21/06/2017 22:15

It was intended for advice Maisy.

Clearly what YOU want is to be unpleasant. Not lovely to read.

OP posts:
Piggywaspushed · 21/06/2017 22:18

What advice do you want?

I advise that teachers sometimes shout.

I advise that you should talk to your DD about how it is wrong to video anyone without permission and the right thing to do would be to inform the school.

If DD is very upset, I advise approaching the right person at school about your DD's feelings. Not about their shouting per se but about how she is finding the transition tough.

I still want to know where you saw the video. People are giving you a bit of a hard time because you keep being evasive on this.

SmileEachDay · 21/06/2017 22:18

User advice about what, though? Several posters have made suggestions or asked for clarification. You have mainly ignored it and have dripped the info about the video, then said it was on fb and now say the member of staff knew...

What advice do you want? You've already spoken to the school, because you informed them about the video...

BoysofMelody · 21/06/2017 22:21

But a teacher will come in to speak to the class and scream. Assemblies see them screamed at. They are screamed at as soon as they come in (coats off etc.)

Yeah, that's complete bollocks.

user1498071458 · 21/06/2017 22:24

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

QueenofLouisiana · 21/06/2017 22:24

Ok- I'll bite.

So a teacher will be struggling and shout. That's fine.
They send for support. The HOD/HOY comes in and raises her voice very loudly indeed for a prolonged period.
I would personally call that screaming.
The children are not spoken to respectfully.

So the point at which two teachers have had to stop doing their jobs, in order to allow the education of z group of children to take place, the concern is that the children aren't being respected? I'd be concerned that they are wasting the chance of an education, being too loud and interrupting the learning of others and being damned rude!

In teaching, our voices are our livelihood- no Voice, no job. We rarely risk it unless it's necessary. That said, most of us have got the ability to bellow, but its way more effective if it's used in small doses.

Whenever I visit DS's school I am astonished by how quiet it is (even when I visit as a professional not a parent). I don't know where they hide 1500 students, you barely hear a word.

MaisyPops · 21/06/2017 22:27

I have no idea what advice smile.

User clearly feels they are more experienced and better qualified than many of us on this thread on the grounds of hear say and a video that may/may not be on Facebook.

Clearly what YOU want is to be unpleasant. Not lovely to read
Haha! OK then. That's why I have students from those classes asking if they'll be with me next year. Because being firm, fair and explaining to all children that I want them to learn is so damn mean and nasty.

I really hope none of the teachers on here have a child come to them saying they have been abused. I bet you'd say they were talking bollocks wouldn't you
Nice way to ramp the discussion up. Let's bring safeguarding into a discussion about student behaviour and attempt to make it seem the same.Hmm

For what its worth (though you evdiently know loads about school).There are safeguarding policies and procedures. When a child discloses it is not our job to decide if they are/aren't being abused. It is our job to report it objectively to designated people who deal with social services.

PortiaCastis · 21/06/2017 22:28

user your last post is extremely insulting and uncalled for
There are an awful lot of very good dedicated teachers who use this site and you are disrespecting them

SmileEachDay · 21/06/2017 22:28

I really hope none of the teachers on here have a child come to them saying they have been abused. I bet you'd say they were talking bollocks wouldn't you?

Wow. That's pretty offensive.

QueenofLouisiana · 21/06/2017 22:28

User you may want to step away from the thread. Accusations like that are, at best, massively unpleasant and aren't doing your attempt at seeming reasonable and concerned about your DD's wellbeing any favours.

A horrible thing to say- no matter how annoyed you are.

Piggywaspushed · 21/06/2017 22:29

No teacher expects to be filmed and put on facebook. I am sure that is straining credibility.

You say the HOY seems pleasant. You need to understand HOYs have complex roles : nose wipers, firefighters, parent liaisers, safe guarders, SLT whipping boys, crowd pleasers, advocates, go betweens...classroom teachers, public speakers,bodyguards media stars

It's a genuine strain. they play many roles at once. Just because she shouted in assembly does not mean she is not pleasant and/ or effective in her job and that you cannot discuss concerns with her.

MaisyPops · 21/06/2017 22:31

PortiaCastis
Exactly.
But really the entire thread was set up to get a "mean nasty teacher" mob.
I think the OP is disappointed that people have said really radical ideas like:

  • Screaming does go on at times when a member of staff is struggling. It's not ok.
  • raising your voice and disciplining is not screaming
  • what students report as screaming often isn't
  • a class that requires additional members of staff in are clearly not behaving
  • why the hell has someone videoed staff and put it on line
PickAChew · 21/06/2017 22:31

Like this, user[fartoomanynumbers]?

Piggywaspushed · 21/06/2017 22:33

OK, to go back to your OP.

No, you wouldn't be unreasonable to ask to speak to someone .

When you do, don't call the shouting screaming. Even you used speech marks in your OP.

There.

Teachervoice · 21/06/2017 22:35

I totally out now. As a head of year, I was actually taking your concerns semi seriously until your last post. How incredibly offensive. Biscuit

KittyVonCatsington · 21/06/2017 22:37

I really hope none of the teachers on here have a child come to them saying they have been abused. I bet you'd say they were talking bollocks wouldn't you??

Only someone who has never seen the true horrors of children being abused and dealing with this over and over again, as a teacher does, could ever say something so incredibly flippant, goady and just plain off tangent to the actual discussion being had.

unicorn5629 · 21/06/2017 22:37

We had the odd teacher who used to shout... one had hair that used to move as he went,I remember it like it was yesterday ! We'd be in classes and hear another shouting at someone in the corridor...
we're we scared? No!
We're we unsettled or impacted psychologically? No!

All I remember thinking was - sucks to be them, I've wonder what they've done wrong ?!

We knew not to get on the wrong side of them BUT we didn't fear them either because they were genuine teachers that would only shout if you did something VERY wrong. You never felt like you couldn't ask questions or approach them.

A colleague of mine said when her then 14/15 yo girls got a Saturday job for a family friend catering that they were shocked with their boss ordered them about or saying when they did something wrong and she'll maintain its because teachers have less ability to tell children off these days.

No one should be controlled by fear but authority in schools should be maintained and parents should support this.