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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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To have not removed DS from tea room?

855 replies

OtAndBothered · 19/06/2017 18:14

Went for day out to national trust abbey today with DH, DS1 (4) and DS2 (2). It's obviously very hot and DS2 was becoming cranky so we came out of the abbey and headed for a little tea room in the village. Sat down with cakes and drinks and DS became more agitated with the heat and started crying. I tried to pacify him but he became more and more upset so DH and I took it in turns to comfort him whilst also trying to each our lunch. It didn't help that the tea room was an old stone building so the cries were magnified and echoing.

Anyway an old couple stood up and started to leave having evidently not touched their lunch. The waiter said to them "are you leaving already? Is there a problem with the food?" So the old woman said "no but we came in here to relax and it's hardly a relaxing atmosphere unfortunately". The waiter replied "I'm so sorry about the noise" and shot us the most evil glare.

DH became agitated and embarrassed saying we should just leave but the alternative was to take DS outside where it was even hotter where he would have cried and screamed even more! I told DH we should just stay and finish our lunch and try and get DS to drink. Anyway eventually he started drifting off to sleep but then a loud noise woke him up with a start and he began screaming. At this point a younger woman slammed her cup down and snapped "for gods sake!". Her husband looked embarrassed and told her to "just leave it" to which she replied "I can't, the racket is giving me a headache! So much for peace and quiet!"

She shot me a look so I said "I'm sorry, he's obviously hot and bothered, it's not exactly relaxing for us either but it's even hotter outside so I'm not sure what you expect me to do?". She seemed to soften up and replied "no, I'm sorry, it's just that people come in here to relax and the noise is deafening, everyone is leaving for that's reason! Can't you take him for a walk or something?" Shock.

Anyway I said "no sorry, as I said it's hotter outside and my other child is still finishing his lunch". With that DH overheard the waiter apologising to customers coming in about the noise. Afterwards DH said I was selfish and we should have just left but I'm not sure what anyone expected me to do! It was 32 degrees outside, he was crying because he was hot! Taking him back outside would have made him much worse and there were people "relaxing" out there too so surely we'd have ended up in more bother?!

OP posts:
nina2b · 20/06/2017 14:50

53rdWay

Again, nobody is saying the thread is over, just that it's a bit ridiculous to constantly tell the OP she's being unreasonable given she already agreed about three hundred posts ago.

People who have not posted up to this point have the right to respond to the OP without being chided for doing so. No other poster should take it upon herself to do that.

nina2b · 20/06/2017 14:52

Today 14:48 user1496484020

It's fair to say that nobody who chose that outing enjoyed their day. Did the OP? Nope. The DH? Nope. The kids? NO. The waiter? No. Everyone within a mile of this family?No.*

Note to self OP. Children do not want to go to fucking NT properties. Please consider more child friendly outings for your kids in the future. Don't inflict this shite on them. I'm guessing we'll see them on the stately homes threads in future.

Also - you didn't order lunch, you ordered cakes and drinks. How it fucking took you 20 minutes to eat that whilst torturing other patrons I can't fathom.

Good post.

nina2b · 20/06/2017 14:54

Today 14:48 user1496484020

It's fair to say that nobody who chose that outing enjoyed their day. Did the OP? Nope. The DH? Nope. The kids? NO. The waiter? No. Everyone within a mile of this family
No.

Note to self OP. Children do not want to go to fucking NT properties. Please consider more child friendly outings for your kids in the future. Don't inflict this shite on them. I'm guessing we'll see them on the stately homes threads in future.

Also - you didn't order lunch, you ordered cakes and drinks. How it fucking took you 20 minutes to eat that whilst torturing other patrons I can't fathom.

Good post.

Chloe84 · 20/06/2017 14:56

People who have not posted up to this point have the right to respond to the OP without being chided for doing so. No other poster should take it upon herself to do that.

No, nina2b, people who have not posted up to this point should read the full fucking thread before responding.

nina2b · 20/06/2017 14:57

How rude.

nina2b · 20/06/2017 14:57

And wrong.

user1496484020 · 20/06/2017 14:59

Chloe - I've read the full fucking thread and it was the equivalent of 20 minutes of listening to a screaming toddler so much did it annoy me. So I felt the need to comment.

Chloe84 · 20/06/2017 15:00

How arrogant to think you can post without reading all of OP's posts. 🙄

Chloe84 · 20/06/2017 15:02

user well, then you did well, didn't you?

user1496484020 · 20/06/2017 15:02

Chloe - how arrogant to think that little old you can dictate how when and if 100's of other users of this site can post. Are you the OP reincarnated?

53rdWay · 20/06/2017 15:03

People who have not posted up to this point have the right to respond to the OP without being chided for doing so

Then respond to all of what the OP's said - including changing her mind and agreeing she was being unreasonable.

If people want to pretend she didn't change her mind so they can feel better about continuing to rant at her, then that's their look-out, but don't pretend like it's a vital principle of free speech that you are being cruelly denied when people tell you to RTFT.

nina2b · 20/06/2017 15:04

This is taking interference to a new level. I wonder if the mods agree.

Chloe84 · 20/06/2017 15:06

Right, so pointing out that OP has already said she is BU is now being dictatorial 😂

Got it, thanks. Nothing to do with posters relishing piling into someone who already admitted they were in the wrong.

user838383 · 20/06/2017 15:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Chloe84 · 20/06/2017 15:07

Careful, now 53rdway, or someone is going to report you to MNHQ Grin

nina2b · 20/06/2017 15:08

People respond to the OP i.e. the opening post. I always respond to it and bear it in mind. People do things in different ways. What they do not need are busybodies telling them what they should and should not do. In addition, not everyone has the time to be here all day long.

53rdWay · 20/06/2017 15:08

The mods are clear that the purpose of the site is to make parents' lives easier, Nina.

I know it's no fun to come into an AIBU thread once the OP's already admitted they were BU, but we'll all cope. There'll be another thread along in a minute for you to yell at, I'm sure!

user1496484020 · 20/06/2017 15:09

Chloe the OP was a heck of a lot more than merely 'unreasonable'. I have held back but I may choose to enlighten you all with my thoughts if you goad me and other users any further. Words such as pig-headed, stubborn, rude, entitled, stupid, idiotic, neglectful, selfish and arrogant come to mind.

NavyandWhite · 20/06/2017 15:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Chloe84 · 20/06/2017 15:11

Nina, you can always change your settings so that all of OP's posts are highlighted. That way, you can just read OP's updates instead of all 500+ posts.

HTH

user1496484020 · 20/06/2017 15:11

53 - We're making her life easier for the future. She won't make the same mistakes again in a hurry (I hope in vain).

nina2b · 20/06/2017 15:12

Oh dear. Patronising has now entered the mix. Well done that person.

mittenXL5 · 20/06/2017 15:13

Much applause there for pretending like you're doing this out of generosity for the poor OP's moral development, userbunchofnumbers. Nice one.

Chloe84 · 20/06/2017 15:13

Chloe the OP was a heck of a lot more than merely 'unreasonable'. I have held back but I may choose to enlighten you all with my thoughts if you goad me and other users any further. Words such as pig-headed, stubborn, rude, entitled, stupid, idiotic, neglectful, selfish and arrogant come to mind.

I think you need to get out of the sun and have a long, cool, drink. Step away from the thread if it's making you angry.

Libbylove2015 · 20/06/2017 15:14

YABU. VVU.

Other people had paid good money to eat their lunch just like you, but it was YOUR child who was creating a fuss.

If he was that bad, you should have cut your losses and gone home - not forced others to do the same.