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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I threatened him.

196 replies

PurplePancake · 17/06/2017 16:31

NC.
Was walking home today and I saw the boy who has been physically bullying my 15 yo ds. I caught up with him and told him that if He ever lays another finger on my son I will kill him. He was on his own and not so tough without his wee pals around him. I'm still shaking. I honestly wanted to smash his ugly smug face in with something

OP posts:
C4priSun · 17/06/2017 23:33

nancy couldn't agree more. The damage done to this boy does nothing to undo the damage done to OP's son. Bullying a child for bullying your child must seem at least a little ironic, but given OP hasn't come back it's most likely not happened in the first place.

threesocksmorgan · 18/06/2017 00:04

yanbu
dh once told the local thugs that he would hit them if they continued to target my then young ds and his mate
they( oh so brave) said we will get our dads.....he said the same....Ill deck your dads

end result they left my 8 YEAR old son and his mate alone
if I saw the ring leader after that he was polite

EastMidsMumOf1 · 18/06/2017 00:15

Bullying a bully?HmmMore like taste of his own medicine. I had a friend commit suicide at the age of 15 due to being bullied. Good on you OP for sticking up for your son!

DJBaggySmalls · 18/06/2017 00:25

If someone hasnt grown out of bullying by age 15, they wont do it by themselves. No one should be surprised when parents protect their kids. Well done OP.

Helendee · 18/06/2017 00:29

Good for you OP, someone needs to stand up for your boy as you can bet your arse that no one else will. I have done something similar in the past when my own boys were being bullied. Well done for looking out for your boy. I hope the bullying stops.

ArchieStar · 18/06/2017 00:35

Well done OP.

The only thing your DS has been taught from this is that you'll actually stick up for him.

I hope this works and your son is left alone!!

Bananasinpyjamas4 · 18/06/2017 00:59

I can understand. It's done now OP, so even though I would say it wasn't advisable, there isn't much you can do about that now. And you were sticking up for your son. I'm not sure about making things worse, I assume it was already pretty bad?

Now though I'd concentrate on what else you can do for your child. Even if it is making sure he isn't on his own walking anywhere for a while. But make sure he's not isolated, try inviting his friends over instead - or picking them up. Even go away for a weekend with your son. If he goes to the same school, be on their case constantly. Keep a close eye on your son and keep communication open.

OliviaStabler · 18/06/2017 06:40

Good for you!

Clandestino · 18/06/2017 06:56

I don't blame you.
And I don't get those weeping "ah, he's just a child" hearts. He's a bully. My DD is a bully and was bullied by another girl her age. That particular girl employed a very cunning strategy, hugging her one day and insulting her the next day. She would gang up on her with others, push her over, trying to befriend DD's friends to get them on her side. It came to a stop when I had enough and insisted on having this dealt with by the school. I have no problem calling this girl a nasty piece of work in front of her and will never be anything else but a dirty bullying liar because this is how she still behaves, just not to my DD anymore.

Clandestino · 18/06/2017 06:58

My DD is 7, I wanted to say. She's not a bully and we lead her to respect others and help them.

Broccolirevolution · 18/06/2017 07:20

Well done OP, you spoke to the bully in the only language they understand.

LoveDeathPrizes · 18/06/2017 07:24

Yeah he's a kid. It's not ideal.

But I still very vividly remember the day my dad told the boy that was bullying me to back off and it was one of the best days of my life!

Jellymuffin · 18/06/2017 07:53

No-one tells these horrible specimens that what they are doing is wrong! We have a child at our school who makes life a misery for LITERALLY every other child, has pushed and assaulted staff. The school has changed since he arrived but 'ahhhh diddums, how can WE help him to have a better day?' Let's forget about all the other children who just want to access their education without being assaulted. Good for you OP, you taught him a life lesson that others are too scared to. You did the little shit a favour!

sexcauldron · 18/06/2017 08:03

One instance does not make the OP a bully.

Intheknickersoftime · 18/06/2017 08:06

Well the OP has not been back and has left everyone frothing. How many times do the words "little shit" have to be used before I can call bingo Hmm

NameChangerConarantly · 18/06/2017 08:12

YANBU OP,

I'll get flamed for this but when my kids are teenagers I'll happily give any teenager a crack if their bullying my kids

Teenagers can be horrific these days.

When I was 18 I was attacked to group of teenagers, they stabbed me in my head and went to slash mt throat, I still have the scars on my arms where is put them up infront of my face and neck to protect myself

You did right OP, if it was me I'd of given him a crack on top of the threat

SoupDragon · 18/06/2017 08:31

Perhaps the bully's parents have been round to threaten the OP because she threatened their son. Which is OK as it's OK to protect your child.

This is how things escalate.

AntiopeofThemyscira · 18/06/2017 12:07

This thread has made me remember when I was out with my Mum, sister, Aunt and cousins once aged about 15 and We got on a bus and saw my bully. I whispered to my Mum but begged her not to say anything. However she told the rest of my family and when this girl got off the bus all my family charged over to the side of the bus and stuck their tongues out at her through the window. Utterly pathetic and childish but it made us all laugh so much and the funny thing was she never so much as looked at me or addressed a word to me again. Some of my cousins were older teens as well so maybe she thought she had better leave me alone.

TheStoic · 18/06/2017 12:43

I'd have done the same thing, OP, with zero guilt.

StillHungryy · 18/06/2017 14:35

I really wish people would focus nearly as much on the damage done to victims as they worry about damage done to perpetrators

Rebel

Trust me I know the damage as somebody who suffers from severe anxiety and depression that can hardly leave the house and thats partly to do with massive bullying younger as well, in fact I was bullied until I left school at 18. The people who bullied me are normal adults now whilst mentally I'm broken, but doing stuff that could mentally damage them wouldn't have made me better.

user1473069303 · 18/06/2017 15:04

YADNBU

I was bullied at school and it left me with very dark thoughts for a few years. It also caused a lad from my school to commit suicide.

No sympathy for the little bastard and others like him. If they can dish it then they've got to be able to take it.

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