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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I threatened him.

196 replies

PurplePancake · 17/06/2017 16:31

NC.
Was walking home today and I saw the boy who has been physically bullying my 15 yo ds. I caught up with him and told him that if He ever lays another finger on my son I will kill him. He was on his own and not so tough without his wee pals around him. I'm still shaking. I honestly wanted to smash his ugly smug face in with something

OP posts:
StrangeLookingParasite · 17/06/2017 19:35

It's brilliant that we are so encouraged that grown ups won't believe the word of a child

What's brilliant is this bully seeing consequences for their nasty actions. They're not 'misunderstood', or 'a child'. There are quite a few children who just love picking on other children. They enjoy it. I have no sympathy for them coming up against the consequences of their nastiness.
Wish someone had stood up for me...

C4priSun · 17/06/2017 19:35

is the only solution to bullying a threat to kill the bully?

SheGotOffThePlane · 17/06/2017 19:37

Well done OP I'd do exactly the same.

Lweji · 17/06/2017 19:40

I'm sure the police would immediately arrest her for threatening to defend her son which she has a legal right to do.

That wouldn't be reasonable use of force and it wouldn't be defence if she wasn't there at the time.

ThanksMsMay · 17/06/2017 19:41

It's clear she isn't actually going to kill him Capri. In fact the only reason he should feel threatened is if he chooses to attack her child again.

The very easy way out would be to stop attacking her son. Which bit of that is an issue for you?

dontcallmethatyoucunt · 17/06/2017 19:41

.

I'd have whispered something much more threatening and dark. I'd lie through my teeth if anything came back on me and I'd let the fucking little shit know, don't fuck with the mummy.

I would make it my life's work to make that kids life a bloody misery until it stops.

I don't blame you OP. Now follow it up with practical steps. Make yourself a nuisance at school. Go to the police and keep the pressure on.

ThanksMsMay · 17/06/2017 19:42

I bet the prisons are full of mums who have given too harsh warnings to bullies. Hmm (though probably not).

C4priSun · 17/06/2017 19:43

thanks still the part about adults threatening kids for me I'm afraid. I'm not sure what part of that is confusing.

Let's hope none of your kids have to report inappropriate behaviour of an adult towards them because I'm they clearly won't be believed. Awesome.

Lweji · 17/06/2017 19:46

I bet the prisons are full of mums who have given too harsh warnings to bullies. hmm (though probably not).

Probably because most don't make death threats?

Lweji · 17/06/2017 19:47

Still, I imagine it would only be a caution or a suspended sentence.

But, OP, don't do it again. Use the proper channels or a more realistic threat.

ivykaty44 · 17/06/2017 19:52

In what world do you live in where police would get involved in something like this? Our police don't even come out to crimes of theft, you just get an incident number

WomblingThree · 17/06/2017 19:52

ThanksMsMay that actually made me lol 😂

Having being badly bullied I would have been chuffed to bits if my mother had done this. It would have seemed like she actually gave a shit about it, rather than being more bothered about what people would think.

Ceto · 17/06/2017 19:55

I love the way people come on here and use the "But he's a CHILD mantra" as if children are all untouchable little angels. This one is within the range of criminal responsibility and has been committing criminal offences against OP's son. If he ended up being arrested, prosecuted and convicted, no amount of shrieking "But he's a CHILD" would save him from being sentenced and having that conviction on his record for some time to come, thus buggering up his career chances. Maybe OP has just saved him from that.

C4priSun · 17/06/2017 19:56

ceto I have no problem with a 15 year old being criminalised and arrested and interviewed about assaulting Op's son, I have a problem with vigilantes.

TheFirstMrsDV · 17/06/2017 20:02

If that 15 year old so much as gave a grown woman a lecherous glance he would suddenly become a MAN on MN.
If he is beating up someone else's son he is a vulnerable child

TheFirstMrsDV · 17/06/2017 20:03

Probably because most don't make death threats?

Have you ever been to East London? Grin

Pollydonia · 17/06/2017 20:05

op it's understandable, it's an adrenaline response. I did something similar but in my case it was to an adult who was a known sex offender. He had approached one of my DC. I kicked his door open and had to be restrained. I am honestly the last person you would expect to do anything like that. I was shaking and nauseous for hours after.

scaryclown · 17/06/2017 20:06

If dickhead thinks he is a hard man, then it's OK to threaten him.

Fanciedachange17 · 17/06/2017 20:06

My dd was being bullied by others in her year on-line and at school. She is fairly resilient and has a swift turn of phrase but it got to her. I saw some of it and we screen shot it and I emailed it to school before texting these lovelies that I had done so and would also be showing the police. The school put them "on report" and in the "unit" for a couple of days (whoopy do) but it continued. I was waiting for her after school (we live too far away for her to walk) and one of these bullies was there having a loud rant to her friends about my DD.
Did I stand by and think "of she's only a child"? Did I fuck. I yelled at her "I don't ever want to hear my daughter's name coming out of your mouth ever again." And do you know what? It bloody worked and even better my dd came out of school at the very moment and saw and was so happy that I believed her and would back her up to my last dying breath.

OP I would have done the same and credit to you for tackling a 15 year old boy. They are huge.

JonSnowsWhore · 17/06/2017 20:06

Bloody hell if I found out one of my kids at 15 was bullying someone else & making their life hell I'd go to town on them & probably say I'd kill em if they did it again, let alone if I found out someone was doing it to one of mine!

Where I'm from 15 year olds are getting arrested for stabbing each other, if they want to act like big men they can surely take a bit of a telling off Hmm

Lweji · 17/06/2017 20:07

Have you ever been to East London?

Yes, but admittedly not that often. Grin

Fanciedachange17 · 17/06/2017 20:09

polly Respect. I would have done the same.

MatildaTheCat · 17/06/2017 20:26

All death threats are not the same. I've threatened to kill dh for leaving his dirty pants on the floor. I imagine if he were to report this to the police they would have a similar level of interest to the 15year old bully quite possibly known to them who was threatened by the mother of a bullied boy.

We read about suicides of bullied kids all the time. Who wouldn't take the chance opportunity to take that bully to task if their DC was the victim?

Papergirl1968 · 17/06/2017 20:28

Good for you! The only way to deal with bullies is to stand up to them.

hackmum · 17/06/2017 20:30

Well done, OP. Hopefully that will be an end to it now.