AIBU that childminder forgot to pick up DD?

[AVY1]

We use a close family member as DD's childminder.

Yesterday I got a call from DD's teacher to say no one has picked her up. When I finally got hold of CM she said she's realised when she got in but could I go and get DD and snapped at me that I shouldn't be angry. There was no apology.

So I had to leave work to get DD and take her back to CM (who lives on the same road as the school!) and then return to work.

Arrived and got told it didn't matter as DD was safe but I said, 'but I didn't know where she was,' to be met with, 'well you haven't told me when I'm having her' - we have a contract and also flexible hours which I give at the start of each new month and is pinned in the office. Friday is a day she always has her though, and has for two years.

DD is still distraught today that she could be forgotten and myself and DH, who are both pretty laid back, are aghast that we haven't actually had an apology.

She also doesn't seem to realise how this may look for her business - if she can forget a family member who else could she forget?! I know people make mistakes but for a CM this is a pretty big one and if it were anyone else I wouldn't think twice about looking for a new one.

AIBU to expect an apology rather than being blamed?

Of course anyone can make a mistake - but just imagine for a moment being in that situation.

You're halfway down the toad to home when you realise with horror that you've forgotten a child.

Do you a) call school immediately to tell them you're on the way, turn all the kids around and walk back to collect them, whilst also calling the parents to grovel?

Or b) think oh well, nearly home, DC will be with a teacher and their DP already called, so no need to worry and carry on walking?

Then add in the family relationship. Ye gads. I just couldn't imagine what was going through her mind.

I know this is a bit beside the point and depends upon DD's age. Why was CM worried whether DD was safe and why in your OP did you say you didn't know where DD was? Wouldn't you both have known that she was safe at school?
Schools usually keep younger pupils until they are picked up by a known adult and older pupils are usually told to return to the school office if no one is there for them. (After a certain time the staff sometimes hand uncollected pupils over to the police but that's another matter.)
It sounds as if you've normally got a good system with the best CM available so don't be too quick to sack her! Is she too busy, with 'day babies' too so that she loses it a bit when parents are late collecting?
I hope you get it sorted anyway. Poor DD, children really get upset when then are last to be collected or apparently forgotten.

Big apology. I hadn't properly RTFT. So CM left poor DD because she knew she was safe. From the later posts I'd not read properly, no, you haven't got a good system at all. 💐Sorry!

AVY1 - did you manage to chat? How is your DD feeling now?