MIL Surprise, surprise

[AmberStClare]

DP is away from home on a course and have been enjoying this week on my own, slobbing out in the evening after work, eating supper in front of the TV and generally having a nice time.

Just got home from work and opened the front door, walked into the sitting room to find my MIL sitting on the sofa. Cries 'surprise surprise, got the key from your NDN, let myself in and have come to stay for a few days to keep you company whilst DP is away.'

Just rung DP and he is equally annoyed as is expected back Saturday and we were looking forward to the weekend catching up on each other's news and bit of frottage. All out of the window as MIL expects to be waited on hand and foot, in fact just said if I was putting the kettle on she would love a cup of tea, 'And a biscuit dear if there are any going.'

Who do I kill first, NDN for giving out the key without checking with me first (She has never met MIL before as we moved here recently) or MIL for presuming she can do this.

And an unexpected visitor would just have to muck in, or be resigned to being on their own if the reluctant host is busy!

I read Forever Amber at 10 and found a few surprises therein.

I was wondering how MIL knew which NDN had the key, did her little boy not have any inkling about his DM's plans? A 2 hour train journey without prior notice, who'd do that?? Oh yes, OP's MIL would! I doubt she'll do it again!
I'm just imagining my DIL's face if I surprised her like that, and the sort of things she'd say to my DS.

See, the thing is if she had come out a sense of misplaced kindness, thinking OP would be lonely - when she heard OP had a friend coming for the night, she would have been mortified, and stammering over herself to apologise. Clearly OP had the lonliness thing sorted. That's the sort of thing you do if you plan something nice and turns out to be terrible instead! Maybe you even cry, but in embarassment, and full of apologies.

But she didn't. She immediately wept, tried to get her son to let OP let her stay, and then went around shouting. That's manipulative behaviour.

The stuff of nightmares ....and sitcoms.

Perhaps she came unannounced to check up on you!

Navy, MN used to be a lot more balanced. Before, it would have been ugh, poor you and a thread full of witty exchanges to keep you sane while you got on with the job.

None of this self-righteous pseudo-administrative/psychological crap.

But didn't you know OP... You were meant to be awfully lonely, pining and crying for your dear absent amazing husband of an evening, not thoroughly enjoying yourself!

(not you, OP!)

Wow! Has she gone yet?

Nice one MsMay. Jeez.

What? My mil is also dead, i don't see the point of those posts though. It's absolutely shit.

Where does it stop? My boss is an asshole.

My boss is dead. I wish he could still bully me at work.

People are individuals. There is no such thing as a homogenised group of women who are exactly the same called "mils". Some will be great some will be nuts, some won't be interested.

How is it all relevant that one person likes their mil?

OP I hope you and your friend are enjoying your prosecco and MIL is at her B&B!

How long is she booked into the B&B for?

The 'job' being entertaining an adult with no boundaries?

I'm really surprised that someone would make such a journey not knowing if the neighbour would even be in (and how did she know which neighbour?), also that said neighbour would happily hand over key to someone they had never met (would anyone here do this?!) and MIL wouldn't communicate her plans to anyone before sitting in the lounge saying "surprise!"

It makes for an entertaining thread but it also surprises me that people's first thought in these very stressful circumstances is to update MN, then helpfully provide live updates.

I fucking love my MIL, she's lovely and much nicer than I ever thought I'd have.

But I'd be fuming at this situation. Because it's extremely bloody rude, regardless of how you're related.

Who are these awful MIL's??

I have 2 DIL's I would never dream of invading their space.
Despite being invited to stay several times (to pet sit) at my Ds's home I have no idea what the colour scheme in their bedroom is, and I really don't need to know.

Ds and his wife often drop into ours unannounced but I would never call on them unless it was prearranged.

My kids have all left home - I live alone and wouldn't DREAM of just inviting myself over to one of their houses, even during daytime and even to offer to take them out for lunch! I always ring/text and ask first! Even if I'm feeling a bit lonely - it's not their job to cheer me up, that's up to me!
In turn. they always ring or text me if they are popping home for a few days, even though they know this is their home. Surely, that's just polite?

Aha, there! It's not "entertaining an adult with no boundaries", it's "welcoming a family member" and explaining that, although it's nice to see them (basic manner alert), they'll have to not mind you getting on with your business.

To those sympathising/defending OP'S MIL, be grateful you don't have a nuisance MIL.

You what, RosePrincess87? Who says?

Navy, I wonder if I once "knew" you...

Oh god. This is my idea of hell.

My in laws let themselves in without warning and that pisses me off. Thank god they never expect to stay!