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AIBU?

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Nuisance Nanny - part 2. The Aftermath.

807 replies

Writerwannabe83 · 13/06/2017 19:37

Sorry for the delay in starting the new thread but blimey, what a nightmare this is turning out to be Sad

I went round there, Mr NDN let me in and showed me through to the living room where Mrs NDN was on the sofa. I smiled at her and went straight in to my apology about swearing at her and how I shouldn't have done it, that I was just angry and frustrated and that I had lost my temper. I said I had simply been confused about the Nanny's behaviour, her excuses, the mixed up stories etc and that I had let myself get too wound up but that I shouldn't have sworn like I did. I was sincere (because I did mean it) and I genuinely thought she would accept my apology but she went mental on me.

She basically ignored what I'd said and launched into me about how unhappy she was about the fact she'd come home to find her Nanny all upset because apparently I'd been threatening and intimidating towards her!!!!!!

Mrs NDN then said that I should be ashamed of myself for upsetting a young woman so much and that if I had any problems with their Nanny then I should be speaking to her and her DH as the employers, not being aggressive towards the Nanny herself which is a complete U-Turn from what she said to me yesterday!!

I started to try and explain about the parking but she brushed me off and said she knew I'd parked across their drive and that the Nanny had simply made an innocent mistake by parking across my drive again as she'd honestly believed I was at work and that my response to park across their drive had been a total overreaction.

I said to Mrs NDN that yesterday she told me that if I had any issues with the Nanny then I was take it up directly with the Nanny, so why now is she having a go at me for having done doing exactly that?!

It was so bizarre!! Yesterday Mrs NDN was throwing her Nanny under the Bus but during her rant at me she was acting as though the Nanny is all pure and wholesome!

Apparently the Nanny has told the NDNs that she needs some time to think about whether she can continue working with them as she no longer feels comfortable working in an environment where she feels vulnerable!!!

It's absolutely crazy!!!!!
I feel like I'm living on another planet.

Mr NDN didn't really say anything, he just sat there whilst his wife ranted at me.

I'm back home now and have been quite tearful about it to DH. I genuinely wasn't aggressive or threatening to the Nanny, I was just being firm. I feel like I'm now the Bad Guy in this situation and the Nanny is the victim. It didn't even occur to me that I might be upsetting the Nanny when I spoke to her before I moved my car.....I didn't think she was the type of person who could get upset....she's been so bloody unbelievable that I thought she'd be too brass necked to feel intimidated by anyone.

I'm just so shocked and this really wasn't what I was expecting.

My DH is furious and I've had to hold him back from going round there himself. He said the Nanny has obviously just turned on the waterworks to the NDN to save her own skin and portray me as the one being in the wrong to take the focus off what she'd done.

I want to believe him, I can imagine the Nanny probably would be that manipulative but it doesn't make me feel any less crap or upset Sad

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
PeppaPigTastesLikeBacon · 13/06/2017 21:30

Of course NDN are going to be shitty with you as this parking thing is now having an effect on them (with the nanny threatening to quit). Well I say good. Now they know what is like to be inconvenienced.
Given you are 7months pregnant it's even more of a piss take as there could be any number of reasons for you coming home early even on a work day (hospital appointment and need to grab your folder etc).

I think you're right in not sending DH round. Hopefully if the nanny does come back then she'll think before parking across your drive. If she needs to pick their DC1 up from school then why not park in front of the drive (after school drop off) and then have her car moved therefore avoiding having to move it when NDN comes home.

RebootYourEngine · 13/06/2017 21:30

The nanny is a manipulative bitch.

Its ridiculous that you cant ask advice on here without the bloody Daily Fail pinching it.

AnnetteCurtains · 13/06/2017 21:31

Report your thread to get it deleted writer , although you you shouldn't have to
Top right
Second choice in

9GreenBottles · 13/06/2017 21:31

Writer Whether your husband chooses to go round this evening or later, photograph any further instances of the nanny parking over your drive, write down the time, and call 101 to deal with. Don't escalate it to your NDN's police station yourself - if that happens through involvement with 101, then so be it.

Good luck Flowers

FrancisCrawford · 13/06/2017 21:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Rachel0Greep · 13/06/2017 21:32

Yes, email HQ or report your own thread and ask for it to be deleted.

Writerwannabe83 · 13/06/2017 21:33

I've reported to have my initial thread deleted. There's nothing identifying in this one I don't think and it's only 1/2 the story so without the DM knowing what Part 1 was about I doubt they'd be interested in Part 2 Smile

OP posts:
MrsPussinBoots · 13/06/2017 21:33

Good luck with everything OP. Sorry you're going to delete the threads, the diagrams are fantastic.

BewareOfDragons · 13/06/2017 21:33

I'll be very sorry if the thread goes before it's resolved in the OP's favour, as it should be. NDNs and Nanny are out of order. They know it. Can't cope with it. Too bad.

sweetbitter · 13/06/2017 21:34

I don't see that the nanny / NDN have legs to stand on. Regardless of who has been shouty / upset / agressive to who, she keeps illegally parking over your drive. That's the bottom line. And they're police force!

winobaglady · 13/06/2017 21:35

you have your previous thread, date and time stamped, that details the stress you've been under.
Also details your previous interactions. You've done nothing wrong.
Keep strong

TattyCat · 13/06/2017 21:35

The dripping oil into the drain is a MASSIVE issue, if that's what she's doing. IF she parks there again (I doubt she will, now) then take a photo of the exact position over the drain. Regardless of any other reason for parking there, THAT is a major and prosecutable offence.

In all honesty, the nanny just sounds very thick, albeit a little manipulative too, so I doubt she'd be smart enough to even think about that, but it's a huge sway in your favour to suggest it's deliberate.

PoorYorick · 13/06/2017 21:36

Nanny clearly has a scary employer and it's possible OP's 'talking at' her earlier was harsher than we might realise. She's clearly been in the wrong parking as she has, and OP was right to park over the drive in response. But I wonder if, somewhere along the line, she really has become a bit frightened.

If she really were the super slick long game player everyone thinks she is, I can't help but feel she'd have parked more intelligently early on.

user1487941567 · 13/06/2017 21:36

I'd copy and paste your responses in the previous thread though OP. It's a dated time stamp of events from your side showing what happened.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 13/06/2017 21:36
AnneElliott · 13/06/2017 21:36

I don't think you've done anything wrong op. Our neighbours DIL used to park across my drive even though her pils drive was empty!

She did it cause fil needed to park his Jag on the drive and it was a hassle to swop them over. But apparently not a hassle to park over my drive Hmm

I had to go batshit before she stopped doing it - basically I had to make her more afraid of my reaction than her fil's reaction. Neighbours thought I was the most unreasonable person in the world.

AuditAngel · 13/06/2017 21:38

So, Nanny chose to park blocking your drive after being told not to. Her employer said sort it out yourself. You did as she said and you're in the wrong.

This is why we bought a house with no neighbours

GlitteryFluff · 13/06/2017 21:42

Oh what a shitstorm.
You haven't done anything wrong op.
Let's just hope from now on she won't park in front of your drive and everything will calm down with your neighbours.

Dailystuck71 · 13/06/2017 21:46

You've dealt with things really well OP.

Sprinklestar · 13/06/2017 21:54

You've done nothing wrong. Basics:

You have a drive.
You need to use said drive.
Nanny Twatty regularly prevents you from accessing your own drive/property...

All you've done is defend your corner. Sure, it's a bit more complex as the problem is being caused by the employee of a neighbour, but you'd think they'd want to maintain neighbourly relations. Given their behaviour tonight, I'd be getting a solicitor to write to both them and the nanny, c/o their address, asking them to cease and desist their harassment of you. Deliberately blocking the driveway of a heavily pregnant woman who may need to get to the hospital quickly is despicable behaviour.

SexLubeAndAFishSlice · 13/06/2017 21:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

redshoeblueshoe · 13/06/2017 21:58

You could also ask for any identifying diagrams on this thread to be deleted.
You might want to copy your previous thread before it gets deleted.

FlyingJellyfishintheAttic · 13/06/2017 22:03

You have to get law involved. Make it clear that them protecting their drive from RN oil does not mean it is acceptable to use yours. It inconveniences you and you don'tr want oil on yours either. Tell NDN you will report them to police and their particular station.

OneThingAndThenTheNext · 13/06/2017 22:04

Innocent mistake my arse. What will she be doing when you're on maternity leave and not at work, was she planning on parking round the corner all the time then?! Flowers for you OP hope you're feeling better

TweedAddict · 13/06/2017 22:05

You can stickers that take over an hour to soak off. I would seriously keep on putting them on the nannys car.
Tough shit if it's the end of day and needs to get home.

But seriously, why would you want to employ someone who can't take a simple order, she's looking after your kids; I wonder what else goes on behind closed doors

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