Would you let your dd go to little mix concert?

[gutsywillow]

Okay so my question is if you are a feminist and disagree with the sexualisation of young girls would you allow your DD to go to a little mix concert?
My cousin has offered to take my DD with her DD. My DD is 9. Would I BU to say no?
I feel uncomfortable with it, firstly I don't want to be promoting this kind of portrayal of women and how women should look, secondly its really, really crap music.
Will she grow up and think, blimey why did my mum let me go to that? I thought she was a feminist!

I'm taking mine in November. She's 10. I dislike them but am pleased they aren't simpering wimps. And they are a decent shape. Not scrawny. I agree they are rather sexualised but, frankly, so is everything. Arianne's pseudo bunny ears and the apparent actual meaning of "side to side." I think we'd agree that she exercised considerable maturity and grace after the Manchester bombing. Positive qualities.
I would rather not make it forbidden fruit so I am taking her.
I'm in my 50s. I've bought her pink ear defenders Maybe I'll need them instead.

I totally misread this as a thread about letting your DD mix concrete which I thought was an odd thing to be asked to do but a useful life skill nether the less.

That would be an amazing thread!

Have you listened to the music? Wings and Salute and both have pretty good messages in terms of female empowerment

Yy, see also Power.

Feminism is about having choice.

YABU to not let her go, it's more likely to put her off "feminism" as that's the reason mum gave to stop her doing things she wanted to do

Thing is, I don't think you can protect her from sexualised images. If she doesn't see the concert, she will still see television, adverts, posters, pictures that sell that music with sex. And as other posters have said, most artists do talk about sex, drinking, and other adult activities. Unfortunately you can't keep that all from her, as much as you may understandably wish.

I do think she is a little too young for a concert, regardless of the dress of the band. And I think Little Mix need to make a decision - they can't continue to be marketed as kid-friendly with all the references to sex, raunchy dance routines, and revealing outfits.

I wouldn't let my dd, just turned 10, go. She bought herself the CD and that was enough of a shock....
I hate the oversexualised girlband rubbish pop aimed at very young girls. The Spice Girls - ye Gods, 8 year olds singing "two become one" used to make me cringe. I know my dd would come home singing the songs, pouting into a mirror and doing the "sexy" poses, uggh. No.

I went to see Little Mix recently with my daughter, they put on a great show and their singing and harmonies were fab. Their dress sense is a little quirky but they are wearing stage costumes designed to grab attention. Its not fair to condemn them as slutty, they are four young women, having the time of their lives and working hard.Not bad role models at all.

Cappattack, I see your point, but I really limit what my dds see on tv, and don't let them browse youtube etc. They don't read magazines, so they really don't see most of this stuff.

I think the Spice Girls were more simpering and man - pleasing than Little Mix . And I was too old to be a target market for the Spice Girls.
I still think making it forbidden fruit is a bad idea. I will be going to the Manchester Arena gig with dd (10) in November.

Slightly torn here. Whilst I am pretty appalled by the 'slutty' references in the context of feminism, I took my DD(9) & her friend to the Capital summertime ball on Saturday, which LM closed.

I really do struggle with the sexualisation of young girls at the moment, which is primarily led by the media and role model female bands and singers. The sexualised image is driven by the big record companies, which leads to the conundrum, do little mix dress like they do as an expression of feminism, i.e. Wear what you want and make your own choices without judgement? Or are they reinforcing the misogynistic led view that sex sells? My jury is out as the performance I saw on Saturday was more than questionable outfits, it was the pelvic thrusting up against the male dancers, constant rubbing of breasts and thighs. Was this a display of feminism or reinforcement of sexism?

Re my previous post, it's not what they wear I couldn't give two hoots about what somebody had on, but Dh said they were actually doing sex moves on stage and other really rude things, and most certainly not suitable for a 9 year old.
My dd loved the concert, I'm glad I didn't know of this before she went as I would have thought twice about dh taking her at that age.
We're a very musical family, love festivals and concerts together and I'm certainly not prudish at all, I just think they should have a 14+ rating (like Katy perry and miles Cyrus did) or they should realise their audience and tone it down a bit.

My issue of the clothing is the same as the aspect that this does not seem to be a free choice of their band but of their management, so it is at total odds with the 'female empowerment' message they are attempting to put out there.

I actually think they are good role models for the message of not caring what people think of them and trying their best in a male dominated industry to 'do their own thing' but they aren't really doing their own thing. As you find with all bands (that all break up and tell a sad story afterwards) it is about what management want to portray, not the girls themselves.

That in itself is a worrying part of it for parents of young girls but the entire concept of manufactured pop/the burst of the pop bubble is all part of growing up though. We all went through those times as youngsters going 'what? They didn't really like each other all along?!!'

There is always a fine line with manufactured pop that is close, but not quite over it so it is 'safe' for kids, whereas artists who are more free to express and manage themselves are self governed, for instance likely to swear or do something sexual style on stage.

PolaDeVeboise

'Slutty clothes'? You're no feminist. A true feminist would allow other women to be, act and dress how they wish to.

^^ This
A few people sound way over the top on how they try to control their children's music taste and style. I suppose it gives them something to rebel against in a few years time....

I'd let my dd go but I don't like the way women are portrayed in pop music generally. I tend to use it as a point of discussion though. It's not that I have a problem with women wearing what they want it's just that the women tend to wear underwear while the men are fully clothed. It's as bad, if not worse, when it's a fully suited man performing with scantily clad women who are there solely to drape themselves over him.
So I don't think it is empowering for female popstars to perform practically naked. It would be a huge coincidence if nearly all women pop stars and hardly any men chose to dress that way without being made to or feeling they should.

DD (14) has been to lots of these concerts for years now, and has seen LM four times already. She knows I will make a tongue in cheek comment about them forgetting their skirts, and she also doesn't want to dress like them. She wants to be a teacher/doctor, and would never let a boy or man dictate what she should do. She likes them and their music, and is no less a feminist as a result.

I am not keen on their clothes though, and struggle to understand what the 'official' position should be. I think I would have an issue in telling these women what to wear. I thought we shouldn't restrict what our young women wear, victim blaming etc. But then we don't want these semi naked women as role models either. Confusing.

"Yy see power also"

Power also has the line "just cause you're packing It all down south, that don't mean I'm ever gonna take it lying down"

"YOU make it rain but I make it shower" - quite subtle apart from the hand movements I saw Jesy do when she sang that bit on a YouTube clip.

Ditto SOTME - "hope she's getting better sex/ hope she ain't faking it like I did..." etc

Lots of these are subtle enough - it would depend on your daughter. At 9 I would not have got the faking reference, did not know what sex was and the down south would have evaded me completely.

My sister's 10 year old niece, however...

Plus I don't think Little Mix's target demographic is 9 year old girls, so I do not jusge them for their lyrics /outfits in the slightest.

LM very innocuous imo. Yes they wear revealing stage outfits but they are no worse then other 'dance' or performance costumes. They generally present quite a positive empowering message of female friendship and self reliance for young girls.

@StatelessPrincess I would be interested in hearing opinions on this too, but obviously no one is going to answer you. Maybe you should start a thread, as I think it's actually an important discussion.

I would like to know how groups like LM are "sexualising" children? We've already accepted that sexual behaviour cannot be ascribed to clothing. We are told over and over again, especially on MN, that a woman/girl can wear whatever she wants without any meaning behind it, so why is it suddenly different?

I don't care how they dress, they're in the "entertainment business" and many costumes are outrageous. However, I do care about their lyrics, which are just not acceptable for small girls to be listening to.
For example, "Touch".
Ok, we can gloss past the 'touch' and 'pressiing buttons' - small children do not know what is being referred to here.
But:
Photograph with no T-shirt on
Why you making me wait so long? (wait so long)
I promise to keep this a secret, I'll never tell
We spend so much time teaching children to keep themselves safe, about cybersafety, what to do if someone acts innappropriately towards them.
This while lyric goes against everything we teach them what NOT to do!

If she was 13, ok. At 9, no.

I wouldnt want a 9 year old DD to go. I dislike the constant "lets exist and be sexy for men" aspects of their performance. Have you seen their new video?! However she will likely feel she's missing out if she likes Little Mix and their music. I don't know if you're a the stage of having a chat with her about certain things

stateless there is a huge spectrum between the clothes of LM and a burka (I know, you said you wear hijab). People dress all along that spectrum, and some will be offended by people at all points.
Britain is a free country, and you have the right to wear whatever you wish, providing strategic parts are covered. The more variety the better!

I don't think they are being sexy for men. I think it's as for themselves as you are ever going to get in pop.
It's their completely normal healthy shape that is a positive. The clothes are ... I've seen worse.

Don't go. It is bad karaoke, with young women whose dress and make up is not a good example.

My 9 year old would be delighted to go and I wouldn't have an issue with it at all. I've 3 daughters, I encourage them all to have their own tastes in music - I'd rather listen to Little Mix than whiny Michael Bolton lite Adele tbh. I doubt your daughter will second guess your feminist credentials.

Is feminism about being completely fine with what all women wear? I support the right for women to wear what the hell they want, but I think it's the opposite of empowering to dress up in skimpy clothes to help sell your image and music. Sure, it has been done for centuries but I don't know if it's a particularly good feminist choice. We all know that bands like this wear that type of clothing because 'sex sells'. Free choice? I doubt it.

Even my 8 year old noticed that they were the only ones in skimpy clothes at the Manchester Concert when even Miley Cyrus managed to cover up.

I would let my daughters see Little Mix but I do find it a shame they wear so little clothing all the time and as a feminist I don't think it's empowering. I think it's quite a shame.