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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have flattened the sandwiches?

271 replies

DryBone · 10/06/2017 14:37

Been dieting for weeks, lost lots of weight and now below target. Thought I'd treat myself to a Burger King today. DH knee my plans as i had been banging on about it all week. I was really looking forward to it after eating like a saint all week.
So plan was today to go and do shopping and then pop to Burger King. Again I mentioned how much I was looking forward to eating this thing I'd been craving all week.

So we took the shopping home, I sort the dog out only to go into kitchen and see DH handing me a bacon sandwich. I said "what's that for?" So he said "well I knew you were hungry so I thought I'd save us the drive". I was fuming and told him I didn't want that, I wanted to go and buy what I'd been planning to buy all week! He said I was being a brat and ungrateful and if I desperately wanted BK I could drive myself - knowing full well I cant fucking drive!!!

So out of pure frustration I hammered the sandwich not realising that he'd put egg in it which splattered everywhere meaning I burnt my hand in the process. Now we're not talking.

AIBU to think he created this by going back on plans and not realising how fucking difficult dieting is when it's relentless for weeks?

Slightly hormonal so am prepared to hear I'm over reacting .

OP posts:
HundredMilesAnHour · 10/06/2017 14:55

Wow, that was a massive over-reaction. Your DH tried to do something nice for you and that was your reaction? And you hit the sandwich with a hammer?! Is this normal behaviour for you or is the dieting making you nasty?

Either way I think an apology to your DH is in order. Maybe he didn't appreciate how fixated on BK you were but a simple "thanks darling, that's lovely of you but I've been obsessing over BK all week, please can you take me there a bit later?"

As an aside, BK is nasty (although not as nasty as McD) so he really was doing you a favour!

EvansOvalPies · 10/06/2017 14:55

I don't like burgers, can't stand McD or Burger King, but if OP said this was what she had been looking forward to all week and her DH made something else for her (although that could seem a kind thing under usual circumstances, in this case it wasn't) then I can totally understand OP being a bit upset.

DryBone - pass your driving test if you can, then you can do what the hell you want. And well done for losing all the weight you wanted to. You are not unreasonable for wanting a treat (even if it is a burger) but you probably deserve some criticism for flattening your sandwich.

For those people saying 'Why eat a burger if you're dieting?' . . . . the same could be said for a bacon sandwich - surely? Not exactly healthy. So OP wanted a burger, had been looking forward to it. Once you have your need in your mind (and tastebuds) nothing will shift it.

Cesar1 · 10/06/2017 14:56

OP this is ridiculous and you have massively over-reacted.
Put it this way, if my DH wanted a bacon sandwich he would ask me to make it for him. Yours has kindly made you something he thought you'd like and that's how you react. Wow!
How would you feel if he "hammered down" on a lunch you'd prepared for him. It would probably scare you and you'd think it was abusive behaviour.
It sounds not his fault you can't drive. Do you always demand to be ferried here there and everywhere?
Well done on the diet though.

Allthebestnamesareused · 10/06/2017 14:56

If the OP has stuck to her diet all week and basically her motivation all week was the treat she had planned for herself (ie. the BK) then I can see where she is coming from in that her DP has decided she shouldn't have that but the sandwich instead.

Yes - a bit of an overreaction by splatting the sandwich but DP should not have made assumptions and should recognise that OP had set a goal with a prize to herself at the end. He in effect decided that she couldn't have that as he knows she can't drive to get it.

GlitterNails · 10/06/2017 14:57

She's not been dieting 'all week' pigs, but for some time, lost weight and reached her target. And you are allowed treats when you're dieting anyway.

Rosieposy4 · 10/06/2017 14:58

Are you five? Massive over reaction, he kindly made you something tasty as a treat ( though why you are deliberately sabotaging your own diet is a little hard to work out) and you behave like a brat because you want some god awful fast food instead 😳

DonkeyOaty · 10/06/2017 14:58

You were hangry.

Eatingcheeseontoast · 10/06/2017 14:58

Really? If my Dh had done flattened a sandwich I'd made him I'd be packing his bags and tell him to stay at his mums.

If he'd made me a sandwich when I'd wNted something else I'd have said ta and said I'd wanted BK for tea. (Disclaimer I can't imagine wanting Burger King over a homemade bacon and egg sandwich).

sunnysouthend · 10/06/2017 14:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DonkeyOaty · 10/06/2017 14:59

What is sandwich hammering though?

ChardonnaysPrettySister · 10/06/2017 14:59

A bacon and egg sandwich is so much better than Burger King.

Coffeethrowtrampbitch · 10/06/2017 14:59

So he agreed you could have something you wanted all week and then gave you something else instead because he didn't want to drive?

Why did you destroy the sandwich instead of him? You could have munched on it while you buried the body, and digging burns so many calories Smile

Our local town has a fb delivery service called One Delivery which will deliver BK, KFC and McDonalds. I suggest you have a look and see if there is a similar service in your town, and avail yourself of it so that you get your food.

MikeUniformMike · 10/06/2017 15:00

OP. You wanted Burger King. You had looked forward hungrily all week to Burger King. A bacon butty is not Burger King. Your DH is an idiot but he did make you a butty, which sounds nice if a bit misguided.
Apologise and ask him nicely to take you to BK. If he has any decency he'll take you. Well done on the dieting.

Eatingcheeseontoast · 10/06/2017 15:00

hundred I'd assumed the 'hammered' wasn't literal,but maybe it was..OP come back and tell us if you used a hammer!

Inertia · 10/06/2017 15:01

Would it not have made sense to get the Bk while out shopping?

It would have been reasonable to say no thanks, I'd like a burger - if he won't drive you, get a taxi.

Tryingtoconceive2years · 10/06/2017 15:01

Burgerking deliver now in some places

EvansOvalPies · 10/06/2017 15:01

Snickers moment. 'You're not yourself when you're hangry'

SugarnetMum · 10/06/2017 15:01

You obviously wanted your own choice off the menu, and had in your head what you were going to order! This is okay but maybe you should of said no that's not what I wanted I need to go back iv been looking forward to it all week.

AddictedtoSnickers · 10/06/2017 15:02

Poor guy! What a princess!! He made you a delicious sandwich and you attacked it! Just go to BK tomorrow instead (that's if your DH is still prepared to ferry you there).

Fluffypinkpyjamas · 10/06/2017 15:02

YABU. Fancy hammering a sandwhich.

Coddiwomple · 10/06/2017 15:02

you should learn to drive.

EvansOvalPies · 10/06/2017 15:03

No, I don't think using an actual hammer was involved. The hammering was done with a hand. In frustration, I'm sure.

pigsDOfly · 10/06/2017 15:03

Okay, missed read it as OP had been dieting all week. Still think her reaction was ott and very unpleasant.

If her DH had behaved like that everyone on her would be telling her he's abusive and it's a huge red flag.

SweetLuck · 10/06/2017 15:03

He was being mean, but you were being aggressive.

YABU

Axissyrr · 10/06/2017 15:04

Er, hang on.

You...flattened a sandwich your DH made for you?

A sandwich that would have tasted better than BK? Confused

I can get that you were really looking forward to the burger, but your DH went out of his way to make you a sandwich. Just imagine this:

"My DH has been on a diet for a long time, and has been craving BK. However, I really did not want to drive today for (insert reason here), so I made him a bacon and egg sandwich. He then proceeded to flatten and smash it like a toddler, and burnt his hand while doing it. He's now not speaking to him. Aibu to LTB?"

What do you think your reaction would have been?