To be irrationally upset by DH's vote.

[brotherhoodofspam]

Just found out that DH has voted Tory for the 2nd time now. He's doing it tactically as hates SNP but I'd already pointed out to him this morning that labour came 2nd here last time. I know it's stupid but I feel really upset about this. I always thought we had a similar world view and I hate the thought that he's done the whole cliche of turning from a left wing student into a right wing middle class professional. He's really angry with me now for the way I reacted but I wouldn't be the person be married if I just said. " that's nice dear". Just now I'm feeling pretty disgusted with him though. AIBU?

I think most labour/libdem/green voters wouldn't Care if their partner voted for one of the other two even if they didn't agree with that party's thinking. Tories have a completely different agenda that hurts a lot of innocent people.

The way ukipers often take Tory votes and the reverse. Similar fuck the little guy (be it the poor or immigrants) ideas.

YANBU. I'd be gutted if I discovered my husband voted Tory. It makes no sense with his life philosophies, which are part of what binds us together and why I love him. I'd struggle to reconcile.

I used the word knob not to slag someone off for voting Labour but because of the hysterical language

My DH voted for Brexit , I didn't. I was mildly annoyed but it's his decision surely?

We both voted the same today.

You know that some people who vote Tory don't actually want to kill puppies?

No because they need the puppies to kill foxes.

Pahahaha you win :D

Are you more annoyed at him for voting Tory or for not tactically voting correctly? I know someone who was talking about doing the same thing and I pointed out that the Tories came massively third here last General Election but then again if enough people have the same thought it could work.

On a more general note. I'm sure most people will not agree with all the policies in the party they voted for's manifesto so its a decision on what you feel most strongly for or against within each party or deciding that the main objective is getting an MP that will best represent the constituency rather than voting for a PM.

YABU Dh and I vote differently, always have. We both have our own reasons for voting the way we do and we're both grown up enough to know that we each have a vote, and can use it whatever way we want. The only time it pissed menoff is if we go to the polling station together, because we so literally cancel each other's vote out. I'm ok if we go separately!

YANBU - politics is very important to me. Certain values are very important to me. I wouldn't have chosen to marry someone who had opposing views on certain key things. My husband and I therefore agree on key matters in politics. If that changed to the extent that he voted for a party I really, really disliked, I would have to question our marriage. To me it would be a bit like a black person married to a white person who became racist...there'd be a core and fundamental mismatch of massive proportions.

I appreciate that wouldn't be the case for others. But I don't think it's unreasonable for it to be the case for you (or anyone else) to be unhappy about how a spouse votes.

It would cause enormous problems in our relationship if one of us voted Tory. We can vote differently but not for them.

Dear.ocracy orbit, I would feel quite stunned if dh admitted to voting for a right wing party.

I don't know who he voted for, tbh. He has an idea who I voted for, since I spent a night reading manifestos and sounding out my thoughts.

And surely adults understand that people can have a difference of opinion ?

Regardless of what you think, you can't tell a left wing voter from a right wing one unless you talk politics.

You do realise that we live in a democracy and he can vote how the hell he wants.

But how people vote can say a lot about them. It's a more extreme example but would you be calm and accepting if your DP voted for the BNP?

Then you get threads saying "AIBU to ask why Tory voters stay quiet?"
Just look at this thread - all the hysteria and name calling.
Answers the question really.

i don't discuss my vote with other people because it's a private matter - bet the OP's DH wish he had thought of that

Vestal is the archetype left-winger.

We can vote differently but not for them.

That should surely read " I can vote differently but not for them."
As I presume your partner is a separate entity to yourself, and has a mind of his own.
God, I'd hate to be in such a controlling relationship as some of you on here.

political views are not just 'which party do i prefer', it reflects a lot on peoples own values and beliefs. So yeah, if they differ that much to yours then of course you have every right to be upset! xx

YANBU, I think it's totally normal to care about and be affected by your partner's beliefs and values. Doesn't mean you have to share them, but of course it means something to you!

So his vote will actually have helped the party he didn't want to get in, to get in? Rofl.
Political views and religious views are ones best sorted out before marriage. I can cope with him watching different TV programmes and liking crap- different music, but not voting persuasion.

livia yet you discuss it constantly on here? I think I've seen you on every politics threads! Do you never chat about it with friends IRL?

YABU. I'm in your DH's position, my DH is upset with me for voting Conservative for the first time (second vote for Brexit). I've told him he can respect my vote in the same way I respect his for Labour.

I find it hurtful the usually openminded man I love is suddenly stereotyping me.

I wouldn't be upset about it. My DP and I have historically always voted in different ways. Does it mean we aren't on the same page as a couple?? Not at all. We have detailed political debates and I find it really interesting to get his views on differing policy. We never try to force our views on each other as we respect we are educated adults and can come to our own conclusions. He is very much a specific policy/tactical voter and has voted for different parties over the 8 years I've known him. We all seem to be taking politics so personally at the moment. Everyone has a right to vote, and a right to vote for whoever they want.

YABU - voting tory in Scotland is often a vote against the SNP - seriously, they are the only real opposition to them - rather than a vote for the sort of 'traditional tory values' people are discussing on here. People are seeking a credible opposition to stop the SNP juggernaut in its tracks. Unfortunately, a lot of posters criticising your dh don't understand Scottish politics at all.

I could never fancy someone who voted Tory. Yeuch!

Yanbu. I would be pretty disgusted if my partner did and would re-evaluate who I thought he was.