To think she's probably not in a minority with her views?

[LauraMoon]

Foolishly talked politics after many proseccos with my True Blue sister.

Now, she wouldn't air these views in public but she knows she can say it to me because I know and love her for the cunt she is.

She thinks that the only reason food bank usage has rocketed is because poor people are lazy and just want free food.

That poor people need to learn to manage their money better and not smoke, drink or have sky telly.

That everyone can afford to buy a house if they really want to, but people waste money.

That anyone can get a decent job if they really put their minds to it.

Unemployment benefits are unnecessary because people should just have insurance.

(My 'favourite') that natural selection would breed out poor and stupid people and that by having a welfare system we are fucking with the natural order of things...

The background to this is that she left school with zero GCSEs and has then worked her way up from an office junior to finance director for an international (massive, household name) company. She bought a house in her early twenties with a loan from our parents and has always been well off. She says this is because she has a good work ethic, and doesn't see anyway that it could all go wrong for her.

Conversely, I am on ESA and have never really had a career, I've been a LP on benefits and lived in a HA house. I'm married now and dh earns £££ and we own our home, but I know how tenuous that all is in reality. She left her dh a few years ago and has her dc 50/50 and doesn't understand why other lone parents would struggle.

Anyway, I feel like I've had an insight into how some other people think and I'm pretty sure her views aren't even all that uncommon.

Does anyone here want to admit to thinking like this? Or maybe you know someone who does?

It's all a bit depressing really.

I've heard those sort of views from people many times - apart from the natural selection part - that's really quite extreme!

Yes I think she had descended into parodying herself by that point. I hope so anyway

My DMs ideas match your sisters OP.

A woman who left school with no qualifications, worked in a low paid job living with her mother in a council house until the day she got married to my dad at 25 years old in 1962. Due to my grandfathers cany financial decisions around the same time, my mother and father were able to be mortgage free and own their house in London by the time they were 40.

She hasn't worked a day for 50 years, and yet is siting pretty with a large house and a big savings pot.

However, anyone out there with less than her 'just hasn't worked for it'

We had insurance when Mr Elbows lost his job the first time. I had to leave my place as a student in order for us to claim on it. In order to claim we had to be signing on and we couldn't sign on while I was in receipt of bursary funding. Now Mr Elbows is a contractor so insurance is not available to him. Your sister should try paying a mortgage and feeding three children on £114 a week!!

Oh dear. Yes, my mother definitely agrees with your first 2 points. She thinks foodbanks are unnecessary and most unemployed people could get a job if they really wanted one. She doesn't believe anyone is poor. She apparently knows what poverty is because they had very little when she grew up. And I'm sure they did. The fact that her father owned his own shop in the centre of a popular town with a 2 storey flat above escapes her.

So she lived rent free with mummy and daddy before taking a loan from them, but still thinks anyone can buy a house if they try hard enough? And her Plan B was to live with mummy and daddy for a few more years?

How on earth do you keep a straight face?

This sort of attitude always worries me. I want to scream at these people "check your privilege"!

Most people don't benefit from a loan from their parents for a house. What if she didn't have a good employer who helped her up the ladder? What if exDP took for fit everything and she ended up with no house and 100% childcare?

These things happened to my DPs mum who was left with 3 kids, a huge mortgage and no job when made redundant (1980s industrial north collapse). The reason why her children did so well in their later lives was because they relied on the state for support, through free good state education (especially post 16) free childcare so she could go back to work eventually and a proper NHS. You take away the basics and when someone does fall down the cracks of society, society helps you get back on your feet and helps your children too, so they can be good contributors to future society.

I don't keep a straight face tbh. I just call her all sorts of names and take another sip.

I am not a Tory, but these views are not limited to just Tory voters btw.

My DSis is similar. But she also looks down on people who had "lots of help from mummy and daddy", despite the fact she had the same, just perhaps a bit less ostentatiously.

I agree with her on points 2,3 and 4- and yes, I'm voting Tory

A copy of A Christmas Carol for Christmas could be an idea! It is the philosophy of Scrooge.

How did she get started with Zero qualification s?

Show her this:

www.ted.com/talks/paul_piff_does_money_make_you_mean

We know there are folk out there that think like this they post on here occasionally, on fb and Twitter and I occasionally meet one in real life.

The truth is if you're doing ok it's likely because you were lucky not because you're that fantastic

Also show her:

digitalsynopsis.com/inspiration/privileged-kids-on-a-plate-pencilsword-toby-morris/

It's by the grace of that you do ok in life.

I didn't choose to be born with a wonky brain, dodgy eyesight and back muscles.

My friends didn't choose to have CP, or ME or fibro or aspergers or mental ill health.

I didn't choose to be born into a working class family rather than say royalty. I'm damn sure starving babies in Africa, Asia, South America didn't choose to be born there.

I was fortunate enough to be born into a country that has a pretty decent welfare state and nhs (at the moment). I was premature, have the trifecta of asthma, eczema and hayfever, numerous allergies. I have endo, ibs, need glasses, am being checked for if I need a hearing aid, have mental health problems (pretty major ones). But was fortunate enough to be born with the right kind of intelligence and oratory skills to gain both a diploma and degree and work for most of my adult life in jobs that were hardly taxing in comparison to say working in a diamond mine for a pittance.

My daughter was born into a developed country and we were covered by the reciprocal agreement on health cover within the EU. (Was living overseas with army husband at the time). She was born with 2 major health issues and had to be in scbu for a week. I'd had an emergency section just to get us both here safely. Dd was a few years ago diagnosed with a disability. This will limit her employment opportunities and may end up with her in a wheelchair by middle age.

None of this can be prevented by 'a change in attitude' or 'working harder'.

Your sister has benefited from a quite stable economy, a secure environment to grow up and work in, a decent welfare system (has she seriously NEVER received a penny in ssp, tax credits, child benefit, smp? I highly doubt it), and nhs and nationally organised emergency services. A free education up to the age of 18 and a subsidised one post 18. If she's roughly my age (mid 40's) or older, she could have gone to uni for free probably. She's received healthcare from people trained by the nhs.

As I say I do know people like this but I'm utterly bemused that they cannot see the facts!

(My 'favourite') that natural selection would breed out poor and stupid people and that by having a welfare system we are fucking with the natural order of things...

Love this - She would find a like mind in my brother.

1-4 she may have a point on but with regards to 5 I'm on the fence as workers pay NI and tax which pays for the safety net.

I'd be looking into organising some voluntary work for the both of you to do together.

Desperad0

Quelle surprise.

My friend was retired with ill health at the age of 52 after working all his life. He has to claim benefits to get by. He's housebound and hasn't needed a food bank, but he does spend some of his benefits on Sky TV. Why shouldn't he? It's his only enjoyment in life when he's stuck inside 24/7.

There's an awful stigma that everyone on benefits is smoking and drinking away their money, which just isn't true at all. It might be if you only ever watch Channel 5.

And no, it's not so easy to just get a well paying job if you put your mind to it, but even someone as incredibly naive as you knows that. Many areas don't have those opportunities, so people are underemployed - either on minimum wage jobs or zero hours contracts.

And yet again, it isn't so simple to buy a house, but you know that as well.

Are you a troll by any chance?

And a subscription to something other than the Daily Mail.

Do people not think that 'hard work' is not just for the professional classes? Is cleaning easy? Is standing on your feet for 12 hours behind a bar easy? Is carrying bricks around a building site easy? Any 'sitonarseinofficeallday' job is surely far easier?

Desperad0 really?!! You do know that most jobs advertised are not full time? A lot are less than 10 hours per week nmw (could you live AND save to buy a house on £75 a week?) and even taking that into account there are 4 X unemployed adults MORE than the number of jobs available? People are working 2/3/4 jobs just to make enough money to live?

And no the majority of us on benefits don't smoke, drink and sky tv the money away! We eat, heat and clothe ourselves and our DC with it same as you.

Ha your sister is a prime example of what is wrong with this country. She has had everything offered to her on a plate yet other people don't work hard enough.
Ask her what would happen if she woke up one day and had a seizure, then had at least 10 a day for the next three years.
That happened to me when I was 21. I have a job now but for five years I could not work.

1 in 3 people will find themselves having to take a long period off work due to illness or disability. I take it mummy and daddy would bale her out then. Others don't have that luxury

Op:
I actually feel sorry for your sister. To be this cold & uncaring is very unusual imo.

I'm sure people who think like that do really know that not everyone can own their own house or get a well paid but they don't give a shit about those people or in fact anyone apart from themselves.

SIL thinks like this. it makes me really angry. She's mortgage free because FIL bought her a house, has no DC, no debts (because FIL paid them off), FIL pays for her to go abroad at least once a year and her and BIL both work full time although they aren't well paid jobs.

She's currently confused why they have more disposable income than me and DH, when we are on a similar income. No amount of explaining that we have rent, 2 DC to feed, childcare etc, is getting anywhere, apparently we should just balance our money better.

She could be my DS. Done really well off the back of a big loan from DF (who conveniently then died and she didn't put back into the estate). Spouts shite about those on the dole living the high life etc. I asked her if she really believed that - is she saying she would actually like to be on the dole if it's so good. No answer to that. Best laugh is, it's low paid/unemployed who are 99% of her customers so she is doing well of their inability to go and do a big shop at a bigger (cheaper) supermarket