AIBU to feel like giving up on the UK

[Fairysnuff321]

My OH is EU born, but has been living here with me and working , paying tax (go those who read the Daily Mail this may shock you)for 20 yrs. He has started his own business and is well respected in his industry. I've always worked in advocacy/counselling/support jobs, I am struggling to get back into work despite years of experience and training because of the lack of funding for these services.

I feel like accepting we have to leave the UK for the sake of our DD. I know so many people in this situation, and feel really sad that every day I hear stories like this...
"I work in the City as does my French partner: the European bankers, lawyers and asset managers are all talking about how London has changed for them now and are thinking it may be time to head home."
My husband feels the same.

It doesn't make you unreasonable to want to move to a different country You will do the best for your family the same as everyone else. YABU for scaremongering.

Big fuss over nothing. I've worked abroad and guess what... it wasn't that hard to get a little something called a VISA!! Mountain out of a molehill much??!!

exactly what quitecorday says...........

Did it ever occur to any of these people that the thousands of British Londoners, many who have been driven out of the capital by the high cost of living, may have spent the last twenty years distressed at how their London was changing? Supercars racing down streets outside their homes, their quirky markets turned into corporate money pits, their areas gentrified into soulless wastelands of glass where hundreds of new build apartments stay dark night after night and are nothing more than a place for the global wealthy to park their money? Or their homes compulsory purchased from under their feet and the new development marketed to investors in the Far East?

Changes made over the years have not always been positive for the indigenous population, in fact quite the contrary. More similar to crude social cleansing than development frankly. Democracy is an illusion now being performed by a second rate magician and even children are shouting, its up your sleeve!

Nope, we've left Europe.

London has certainly changed over my lifetime (50+years) the most negative being that house prices are unreachable for most. I don't see so many changes since Brexit, except that it now seems more acceptable to spout racist views.

OP if you can't get work, retrain and do something else. I had a complete career change in my thirties and it is doable. Your skills sound very transferable.

If you genuinely think your DD is better off abroad then by all means go. I think my daughters have benefitted enormously by living in London, especially exposure to the arts, theatre and all the rest of it and that hasn't changed.

Not really no, and I'm not being flippant about this either, maybe it's just my personality and the way I look at life. Life is an uncertainty.

OK and so you decided to make a sweeping generalisation and are questioning other people's feelings because you don't feel like it.
I live in Ireland and it feels like there was a change after Brexit. While there are those worried (borders with NI, farmers hit etc.), there are also those who are already looking forward to more job opportunities in highly skilled areas when the companies decide to move over.
So there's an air uncertainty (and a bit of a hope that United Ireland may be closer than we believed for some) but also an air of expectation because we will gain on business moving from Britain, which is very positive news.

Yeah I sometimes wonder how the Poles would feel if 750,000 thousand + British people turned up. I'm thinking as lot of concrete blocks would be getting dropped on heads

You're aware that Poland had the biggest 'immigrant' Jewish population in Europe prior to WW2 - at 3million?

See ya!

Most companies are probably not actually deserting the City at this point, despite having sabre-rattled to in the run-up to the referendum: there will not be sound financial justification for doing so for most of them.

If a company you are investing in or work for is still going to do that you should probably establish they really intend to do so on the basis of sound business reasons.

Because the gross, the thick, the bigoted and those who revel in their own ignorance reckon they're running the place now and are letting it known. I suppose we should all just wait patiently for these thick, fat wastes of oxygen to slither off back to their stinking prole holes and let decent people live, right?

Your comment is a disgustingly arrogant and you show the hallmarks of thinking your opinion is equal to more than 1 (one) other voters.

As a "prole" who believes in democracy, I have to say Brexit is worth if for people like you to have had your bottoms smacked at the ballot box. Good.

Which country in Europe (or beyond come to that) is a more cohesive society than Britain, with as much multiculturalism and less racism?

I think my daughters have benefitted enormously by living in London, especially exposure to the arts, theatre and all the rest of it and that hasn't changed.

Definitely. London is my favourite place in the world and I feel extremely privileged to be from here and able to live here.

OK and so you decided to make a sweeping generalisation and are questioning other people's feelings because you don't feel like it.

What on earth are you talking about? I'm not making any sweeping generalisations. All I've said is, uncertainty aside, I don't understand how people can say London has changed since the referendum and even said along the lines of "but if anybody has any stories or experiences they can share I am open to hearing them".

I don't see so many changes since Brexit, except that it now seems more acceptable to spout racist views.

See I can very well believe this if it was talking about online because certainly since, and on the run up to the referendum, there was absolutely vile stuff being spewed out on both sides. But in real everyday day to day life, I have genuinely seen no change. I have not seen or heard anything racist since the referendum nor have experienced anything myself. Online, sure, loads of vile stuff. But I genuinely have not seen anything myself.

Fairysnuff321 Hi OP - i don't know what you expected from this thread? Only YOU and your family can make decisions about your future - not a bunch of randoms on the internet. If everyone said yes go - would you go? Similarly, if everyone said no, stay, its great here, it'll only get better, would you stay? Surely not. Come on now, who can tell you how Britain leaving the european union is going to turn out? Nobody does. If you want to go - then go. If thats best for your family - go. HTH

Fascinating post Quietcorday Thank you.

Most companies are probably not actually deserting the City at this point, despite having sabre-rattled to in the run-up to the referendum: there will not be sound financial justification for doing so for most of them

Financial services need a subsidiary within Europe due to loss of passporting. HSBC, UBS, Goldmans & JP Morgan have announced their plans for subsidiaries. The EU has made clear that they will not accept brass plate companies, they will only grant licences to operations that have sufficient staff, assets and risk management. So companies are moving enough staff to keep operating after Brexit, and deferring the bigger decisions until the deal is clear.

The EU has also now declared it's going after clearing, which it has been trying to relocate within the EU for some time. Around 20% of the city's revenue comes from the EU. Hard Brexit would lose that.

Not saying every European is like this, but in my experience, British people are a lot more careful in how they speak.

So, many of them probably still hold those opinions - they just don't say them! I find this a lot in Britain - people never really say what they think. Or when someone accidentally slips something out, they get told "you can't say that!". It's very PC. I'm sure what people say in public is very different to their actual opinion.

I'm from Russia - while I agree that there is more racism than here, there is definitely less Islamophobia. There are plenty of Muslims in the country and always has been and no-one (AFAIK) has any issue with them, whereas here there's this horrible sentiment of "keep 'em out" coming from a lot of people and media.

A Marxist may very well say that these people have taken advantage of an extraordinary situation whereby enormous capital flows have been allowed to free cross national borders without impunity to the detriment of workers outside the capitalist class

It wouldn't be a very accurate Marxist given that 'workers outside the capitalist class' are some of those who've benefited the most from FOM. Just ask workers from Eastern Europe, Greece, Spain, Portugal etc...

Prior to Brexit I'd have said that Britain, on the whole, was one of the less racist countries in Europe. All that has changed since Brexit. Not only have we seen a rise in racist crimes, we have seen the embrace of overt racism from the government and Brexit campaigns.

Ninon yes I am. I'm not sure exactly what that proves though it was rather a long time ago.

Ninon more than 30% of French people voted FN who are a good deal further to the right than any party or politician in the UK. Look at the government's in Poland and Hungary. To suggest that Britain is a uniquely racist or intolerant place is rather disingenuous,

You couldn't really say no in that context, I highly doubt it tbh. As Poland has coped with an immigrant population 4 times the size of your projected one, within living memory, why would there be an issue?

There's very little between FN and UKIP. 'Not a hair's breadth' in Marine Le Pen's words.

And the Tories have rather taken over the UKIP position...

Ninon in that case why is Poland (and I don't blame them) refusing to EU plans to take in refugee's then.
www.politico.eu/article/threats-to-poland-over-refugees-are-european-populism-says-minister-konrad-szymanski/

Jeez what a load of hideous comments. Op, I'm sorry that our govt has made your family feel unwelcome in the country that is your home. I'm sorry that you've got a load of nasty comments from people not seeing the bigger picture. I'm British without a chance of being able to claim any other citizenship, and I regret the turn this country has taken. I'm a child of the eighties and I grew up with lots of multicultural messages (prob in response to overt racism). My junior school song described us as 'a happy band of boys and girls, gathered from around the world' :D

In the wake of brexit I started to wonder whether we've just reverted to type, and every message I was fed was just a blip. We are a nation of monkey hangers, of 'no blacks, no Irish, no dogs'. I've got deep roots here, but if I had ties elsewhere I think I'd be considering whether I should give up too.

I'm not giving up though. People talked about 'taking their country back', and I intend to. My country is an inclusive and united britain, and my vision of it is just as relevant as a fantastical creation of nostalgic fiction. It's just mine is more recent fiction and it includes people who don't look or sound like me. I totally appreciate why people might go though. I'm sorry x

Because Poland has an authoritarian hard right government with an illiberal agenda - tightened controls over the civil service, courts, media, even attempted to ban abortion.