Non Binary / Gender Neutral

[MissBax]

Okay so I know this may spark some serious debate. I just want to say that I really don't want to offend ANYONE, however AIBU to say that the whole non Binary trend (for want of a better word) is getting abit out of hand??
If someone was born a man and chooses to transition to a woman or vice versa I understand that, but to say you don't identify as having a gender... I just don't understand it?! I am female but have never been girly - I didn't have dolls, I despise pink, and I always played football with the guys, climbed trees and was very sporty. But I'm still a girl. I know boys who didn't necessarily like "boyish" things but they're still boys. Any girl or boy can like anything they like.
Now we have "non binary" people who SAY they don't identify as one gender or the other, yet some of them are born female, wear make up and dresses. So following typically "girly" or "feminine" characteristics. Or those who have a sex change and THEN say they're non binary?! So then why have the sex change?!
AIBU to think this is just another way to ruffle people's feathers and possibly attention seeking?
(I wait in anticipation for being called ignorant and a biggot etc...)

It feels like a reaction to the hyper real media presentations of gender. The performance of masculinity/femininity has never been so extreme from baby hood onwards. Part of the reaction to that is separatihg yourself from your perceived notions of what feminine or masculine mean and these endless divisions narrow the definition of what it is to be male or female and that's why it worries me. I am wearing boy's boots and a man' a hoody today - my hair is short - so what I am absolutely a woman but if the trend continues I will be assigned to a category by others because to be a woman is becoming an ever more restricted identity.

I agree too, olderthanyouthink.

Women all over the world cannot identify out of sex discrimination.

so can we be sued now if we say 'he' or 'she' incorrectly?

is saying 'he' or 'she' now an act of abuse? what should we say instead?

should we just say 'genderqueer' as Teslasdeathray suggests?

But I get shouted at for even merely suggesting that 'teen tribes' and 'social contagion in teens' are real concepts

If these stories we keep hearing about hordes of teen girls at sixth form coming out as schools and sixth forms isn't a perfect example of that, I don't know what is.

Yes to whoever mentioned goths and emos. Tumblr especially is an absolute haven for navel gazing teens/early 20s (not knocking it, unused to be one myself ) aligning themselves with "alternative" gender identities in the same way we l did 20 years ago with indie rock bands.

It's just attention seeking. As soon as they can't rely on mummy and daddy and their student loan they'll move on.

Pleas excuse my shitty sentence!

TeslasDeathRay So I should just ignore science and the English language when talking to my GNC child? (And yes, by today's standards I actually do have one)

Don't feel sorry for her. She's growing up just fine being able to dress how she wants, look how she wants and like what she wants. Always have done. I don't push gender stereotypes and have always maintained the position that although she is biologically female she can wear/look however she wants.

What is wrong with not lying about biological reality and ignoring gender stereotypes?

The idea of there being more than two genders literally spans hundreds of years and many different cultures.

And actually, a lot of trans/GQ people don't mention it because it's not safe to, or they don't want to be outed.
People that do talk about it: why should they not? Imagine living that barely caters to you whatsoever and where some people don't even think you should be alive.

It's absolute bullshit.

If you have a penis, you're a bloke. If you have a fanjo, you're a woman. There's no such thing as gender non specific

Simple.

Sex is not the same thing as gender.

TinyRick "trans otherkin furry"

Wot ?!

I refuse to click that link, in case I am converted to the cult

The people who seemed to come best out of it in my youth were the ones who were the kindest and slowest to judge things they didn't understand. So I think I'll hold fire on this one.

Cory, I normally agree with pretty much everything I've seen you write; but I struggle with this one, as the kindest thing to do with a gender-nonconforming child is not that obvious.

I can't see that it's kind to support a child unthinkingly into transition, and in fact I think it could be positively dangerous. There surely, logically, can't have been a sudden explosion in genuine gender dysphoria, so at least some teenagers will be treading a path that they need not be on.

what do we call intersex persons? are they furries? or non binaries? or genderqueers?

sex is not the same as gender. I think we already know that, Tesla.

We leave them out of it, at their own frequent request. Intersex is not transgender.

The only person I saw refer to "it" was regards to someone who wants to be called "it". No one called trans people "it"

Yeah, sex is an actual biological reality (science!), gender is a made-up societal (and consequently also a Patriarchal) construct which differs from society to society and has changed over centuries.

The quote from AISSG is here.

WTF.

Why was my comment deleted?

Oh sorry MNHQ, I got it wrong. It wasn't bras it was just women's clothes.

www.reddit.com/r/asktransgender/comments/68r7y5/how_do_i_stop_getting_erect_when_i_crossdress/

I do apologise.

Lance/Cory, I think being kind which is what most people are is always the best thing to do.Some law firms have welcomed back lawyers who have chosen to change sex and as they tend to be full of fairly well educated polite people it has worked pretty well at work in those contexts.

If I had a trans child I would do what I do with most things - "be natural" is my watch word. My mother was offered the drug that caused thalidomide when pregnant with me and rejected it because her view was that on the whole if we don't take drugs etc we tend to be safer and I agree with that so following on from that if I had a transgender child they could dress how they liked (my sister and I refused to wear skirts by the way or dresses except school uniform until at least 18+, easier in those days as there was less pink fluffy gendered merchandise and dress around than nowadays) but I would not favour operations or hormones until they were 18.

I think its part of the snowflake syndrome as well.

Sex is based on your biology and gender comes from that. I am a woman, but I am heavily into kickboxing and tattoos, but I also love to bake, and wear make up. Who cares? Why cannot people get on with things without all this pettyness over labels.

The trendiness of this horseshit is going to fuck up our kids beyond measure.

Those with gender issues were a tiny, tiny percentage of the population. Today every single school seems to have multiple children identifying as trans or "non-binary". It is the new tribe all the cool kids want to join. But instead of being a fashion that eventually passes, it will leave these kids with lasting damage and psychological issues. Worse still this ideology is actively being encouraged by schools and teachers. It is nothing less than state sanctioned child abuse.

It is up to parents to find out what their kids are being taught in schools and push back on this absolute insanity.

If this it the latest "tribe" then it got to be the most harmful one yet?

Previous ones didn't try and get laws and their own spaces did they, pushing others down while they are at it?
They may have poked holes in themselves, had their skin drawn all over, and wreaked havoc on their hair but they weren't rendering themselves infertile and having major irreversible surgery

Or maybe I'm talking out of my arse, I don't know much about goths, emos etc except they used to freak the shit out of me when I was little