Non Binary / Gender Neutral

[MissBax]

Okay so I know this may spark some serious debate. I just want to say that I really don't want to offend ANYONE, however AIBU to say that the whole non Binary trend (for want of a better word) is getting abit out of hand??
If someone was born a man and chooses to transition to a woman or vice versa I understand that, but to say you don't identify as having a gender... I just don't understand it?! I am female but have never been girly - I didn't have dolls, I despise pink, and I always played football with the guys, climbed trees and was very sporty. But I'm still a girl. I know boys who didn't necessarily like "boyish" things but they're still boys. Any girl or boy can like anything they like.
Now we have "non binary" people who SAY they don't identify as one gender or the other, yet some of them are born female, wear make up and dresses. So following typically "girly" or "feminine" characteristics. Or those who have a sex change and THEN say they're non binary?! So then why have the sex change?!
AIBU to think this is just another way to ruffle people's feathers and possibly attention seeking?
(I wait in anticipation for being called ignorant and a biggot etc...)

Jude how is you saying I make myself sound ridiculous any different to me saying they make themselves sound ridiculous. Calling yourself Merlin is not the same as demanding someone can't call you he/she. Loads of people have nicknames bur they're asking for the actual correct grammar to be changed (and then being offended when we don't do this).

It would be great to live in a society where people could wear what they want and behave how they want without having to have a label such as trans or non binary

Absolutely agree with this Orlantina

Can't be doing with all the gender boxes. Society has enough pigeonholes. No need to create any more.

I don't like to see conflation of gender and sex. Women all over the world have fewer opportunities and experience more discrimination because of their biological reality (being of the female sex).

Exactly what about this situation is affecting your life MissBax? How is a person referring to themselves as "they" directly affecting your life? It isn't, is it? That is where the ridiculousness lies, sorry to have to point that out to ya.

"Absolutely agree with this Orlantina"

I agree with it too Jude THAT'S THE WHOLE POINT

If a child wants to wear a dress to school, then he should be able to without having to be called trans. Or to say he's a girl.

But if a man wanted to wear something feminine at work, society expects him not to. It's 'against societal rules' and that has consequences. But if he says he's trans or non binary, then he has the law on his side.

Maybe we should try and change societal rules.

Many trans individuals think NBs are full of shit too. They tend to be from the old school train of thought - that trans people experience dysphoria as part of the condition and that it's unwise to use the toilets of their gender before they pass. I know this because I have a XX brother who despite being the same generation as the modern trans movement thinks it's full of crazies. He goes stealth these days (that means he is not out as trans to people who didn't know him as a girl/woman.

We can both agree with that statement, that is fine, but labels wasn't the subject of my debate with you. I wasn't talking about labels with you, I was talking about bad manners in not calling someone by the name or personal pronoun they requested and how it doesn't affect your life to do so. Or does it? Hit me with the distress it causes you.

Are people ( is that word allowed any more) allowed to identify as animals?

People are "allowed" to do whatever they want as long as they are not hurting anyone. Society isn't their mum.

If someone who looked like a woman, dressed like a woman, sounded like a woman (and was obviously a woman) and was offended because I called them 'she' I think my response (internally at least) would be "You don't identify as a woman? Fair enough, but I don't identify as a mind-reader"

Been a whe since we had another bigoted thread like this.
I am not a fucking IT or an animal.

Always makes me feel so shit for the children of parents who think this type of stuff. Imagine if your child was going through angst about their gender and they knew this is how you'd feel about them. Statistically it's likely at least one if your children is or will grow up to.

No wonder violence against trans and genderqueer people is increasing. People like this putting their bigoted thoughts into actions.

"society isn't their mum"

Isn't 'mum' a sexist/gendered term?

You should have said 'non binary parent'.

People are "allowed" to do whatever they want as long as they are not hurting anyone

But if people break gender expectations, there can be consequences - such as at work. So yes, people are allowed to do what they want but there can be societal consequence for breaking the 'rules'.

?? what the hell is 'genderqueer'? isn't that a really offensive term? ?

pepper

No... I mean, I guess you could use it to insult somebody, but generally speaking? No...

www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=genderqueer

Society has to change, starting with a few dinosaurs and threatened people on this page.

Women have been discriminated against because they are female bodied, not because they "identify" as women.

^this, so much

Many cultures recognise more than two genders. Gender is solely a construct. I will never understand why this offends some people (many of them mumsnetters) to the extent that it does.

pepperpot Yes they are called 'Otherkin' or is it 'Furries'? I think they are different but also can crossover.

www.reddit.com/r/TrueOtherkin/comments/2cyk9s/confused_otherkin_vs_furry/

One of the commenters is a 'trans otherkin furry' but apparently it's like 'transsexuals' vs 'Crossdressers'...I think.

I have also read comments from a few transwomen who have a desire/dream/fetish to be pregnant with an alien baby. I decided I had had enough internet for that day.

Teslas have you considered the fact that there are actually vanishingly few interactions with other people where what you identify as is even an issue? In most situations it doesn't arise until the gender confused person introduces it.
Most people simply don't care.
What the hell is this need to broadcast it from the rooftops, assuming everyone wants/needs to know??

And on the point of fitting in a box, why are people pitching a fit when there's a box for ethnicity? Are you really white British? Or are you Anglo Saxon Franco Danish (with a dash of African)?

I think everyone tries too hard to be politically correct.

You are entitled to your opinion, sometimes I think the world has gone mad!

OP it's just that everything has to be a 'thing' nowadays. People seem to be incapable of just getting on with life without making a fuss or needing continual attention. Yes I do consider it to be a part of special snowflake syndrome.
Just to clarify, this is not an attack on people suffering from gender dysphoria. I understand that is a genuine and distressing condition.

So genderqueer is what used to be known as "refusing to be typecast / stereotyped / pigeonholed"?
Give it a new name and they'll think you invented it...