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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think I win the batshit hen do game...?

344 replies

mynotsohumbleopinion · 16/05/2017 07:09

Months ago friend asked if I would come on her hen do... cited then as a "cheap weekend in Europe". No problem says I! Well cheap isnt how I'd describe it now!

The hen do is in A well known party island. This weekend. Thurs to Sunday.And the costs have just spiralled.

We were told it was There months and months ago and asked to pay around £450 to the MOH for "accommodation and food etc". It was so far in advance that flights weren't even fully released by easyJet at the time, but she assured us it was pre-opening weekend so they'd be cheap. I've never been so why would I argue this? Flash forward another couple of months to when they are released - turns out that the cheapest return is 90 quid and only then if you go to stanstead at stupid o'clock in the morning, which nobody can really as we all live far from there... the only viable options for pretty much everyone were expensive airlines like ba. £250 later I had flights.

Most people did think that the £450 we paid MOH would be covering most things, so nobody complained really. It was only this week when we were sent the "itinerary" that it became clear how much incorrect assumption we had all made on that front... turns out that the £4500 she's had overall only pays for 3 nights in an airbnb villa not even close to town. I know we all
Should have asked but who on earth would think to?! And actually, I seem to be the only person who thinks this is actually stupid...

The list of costs we will now incur are as follows...:

-- Taxis from airport - 50 euros (we can share this if others are on our plane)
-- Taxis to the main town for each and every activity and meal.
-- All meals out other than breakfast and some snacks for thurs night.
-- Although the villa has a lovely pool, we will apparently be spending Friday at a beach club. Paying for the entry. Where we will have lunch at another cost. Then dinner I suppose. Oh and we are expected to chip in to buy the bride lunch that day at around 10 euro each (100 overall??!)
-- outdoor early evening club at a cost of 40 euro on Saturday and then a later club at a cost of 80 euro after that as it closes early. That's without any drinks or even a table.
-- no booze included at all so she wants us to pick it up duty free. There are no shops near the villa.
-- stupid dress codes for the Saturday which I haven't personally bought anything for but others have had to.
-- she wants us to contribute to a "hen survival box".

I'm broke and I haven't even got there... I'd love to pull out now but flights and accommodation alone mean I'm £700 down!

I win don't I? This is just ridiculous...

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 17/05/2017 21:44

Does no one swim at these beach places? Isnt that the point? Why woukd everyone be bored perched on a lounger?

3luckystars · 17/05/2017 22:06

Ibiza is the most overpriced expensive place I have ever been. It was poisonous dear.

Back out. Lie. Make up an elaborate story and get out of it. Good luck.

MyPatronusIsAUnicorn · 17/05/2017 22:07

Placemarking for a no doubt expensive update from OP. Who wants to bet she gets guilted into spending more and the Hen and MoH throw a strop because others don't want to spend even more money?

I have hen do that was in my top 10 of nights out. It was a Butlins adult weekend and it was bloody brilliant! Think it was about £130 each, chipped in to buy stuff for a cooked breakfast, bought some food and drink, so drank before we went out, had a brilliant time.

BillyButtfuck · 17/05/2017 22:08

Have a safe flight OP, and good luck - you'll need it Grin

Seeeeriously · 17/05/2017 22:10

Shall we set up a crowd funder for the OP? For every update outlining the ludicrousness of the hen do, we will all chip in a quid?

Seeeeriously · 17/05/2017 22:14

Also, OP, given you've already spent a fair whack, try to enjoy it.

Despite the expense, you'll probably have a great time. 🍸🍸

NightWanderer · 17/05/2017 23:02

I don't think there's anything wrong with a hen do abroad per se but the organizer needs to make the costs perefectly clear at the very beginning so people can make their minds up before commiting to it. This one seems poorly organized in that regard. The MoH has repeatedly said it will be a cheap holiday whereas many people have said on this thread that Ibiza is the very opposite of cheap.

FreeNiki · 18/05/2017 00:52

Oh dear she's going.

God speed!

SweetLuck · 18/05/2017 01:08

God, so glad I have not booked Ibiza for my main holiday!

3luckystars · 18/05/2017 01:57

Yes unless you are a millionaire!

I was so shocked at how expensive Ibiza was. After seeing the tv programmes, I had imagined a very young/student/hippyish place but oh my God, a nice burger and chips for two at a table was €70.

Places had tables and priced them according to how good your view of 'the sunset' was. Everything was about the sunset, the SUNSET, I was expecting to see something like the miracle at Fatima.
It wasn't. Maybe paying for it took the good out of it?

It was way way too dear for me. And I didn't fit in there at all.

OneFlewOverTheDodosNest · 18/05/2017 08:52

Personally I'd have queried the concept of a cheap Europe holiday the moment Ibiza was mentioned - it's hardly known for being a budget location is it?!

OneFlewOverTheDodosNest · 18/05/2017 08:52

Personally I'd have queried the concept of a cheap Europe holiday the moment Ibiza was mentioned - it's hardly known for being a budget location is it?!

ShoutOutToMyEx · 18/05/2017 09:00

In defence of Ibiza - I go every year, have a brilliant time and i'm not wealthy. You just need to not be, erm, batshit.

LBOCS2 · 18/05/2017 09:33

Can anyone honestly say that a hen do was in their top 10 nights out/weekends away?

Mine was. It was two nights in Barcelona with 9 friends. We stayed in a hostel room which had 5 bunk beds in, and one of my best friends lived out there so we went to cava bars and local restaurants she knew. We drank cava and got ready together, went for one expensive cocktail at the W bar then had cheap sushi and ended up in a tiny club at the back of a bar. Everyone had a laugh, all my 'groups' of friends got on fantastically and were excited to see each other at the wedding. Cost £450 all in, including spends. It was brilliant.

Iamastonished · 18/05/2017 09:54

"Cost £450 all in, including spends"

Was that per person? If so, that is still a big ask of your friends.

grassinpocket · 18/05/2017 10:01

Yes - that is a lot. I'm also one that has been in a bunk bed as an adult sharing a room with others and loathed it. Bride had no idea.

LBOCS2 · 18/05/2017 10:24

We were all in our early twenties, most had been travelling before (re. the hostel room), none of us had any dependents at that point - and we all had relatively professional jobs.

I'm pretty much the most approachable person in the world, and checked and double checked with everyone that what was planned was ok for all. We spent (I think) about £150 on flights and accommodation, and I took £200 spends. So £350, not £450, my mistake. Although people may have spent more (or indeed less).

Anyway, my answer was for me, not for anyone else. I said that it genuinely was one of the best weekends I'd had, in response to the question posed above.

expatinscotland · 18/05/2017 11:53

'Cost £450 all in, including spends. It was brilliant.'

For a bunk in Barcelona for 2 nights? That sounds about as brilliant as a maggot sandwich, especially if you're in the top bunk. And regardless of everyone having a good job, it's a huge ask for a friend to spunk that on a hen do.

grassinpocket · 18/05/2017 12:19

I think the question about top ten nights out was meant about other people's hen dos? I guess most people would think their own was great.

Like weddings and children. We all think our own are marvellous Grin. Other people's? Not so much.

I didn't have one.

brasty · 18/05/2017 15:36

I have really really enjoyed friends ones. I think they key is are the women's Hen Do you going to a close friend and will lots of your close friends be there? If yes, you will probably have a great time. Do you vaguely know this woman, maybe a colleague or relative you are not close to? Less likely to have a good time.

ClementineWardrobe · 19/05/2017 12:21

Mynotso, how did you fair? Was it all ok? Really hoping you had fun after all. Keeping fingers crossed for positive outcome.

grassinpocket · 19/05/2017 12:25

I think op left yesterday? I'm recovering from an op and have too much time on my hands Smile

Lukeandlorelai4Ever · 19/05/2017 20:13

Wonder how you're getting op!

QuintessentialShadow · 19/05/2017 20:19

If you know them, and you know both bride to be and MOH are well off and posh, why on earth did you think they would stick to a cheap and cheerful hen do?

Surely you would have realized it would be super expensive?

user1469975958 · 19/05/2017 22:02

I genuinely don't understand why everyone feels the need to go abroad for a hen do. Mine was lunch and an evening piss up that we combined with the stags. It was super 😊

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