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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu to not go back to this job and expect to be paid at the end of the month still

128 replies

Sadlady1980 · 07/05/2017 20:52

I started work last Monday, in a crèche in a leisure centre
Worked well as my mother in law lives next door so can do my school run and I'm back shortly after and so on
First job since having DD so thought maybe a good stepping stone to get a better job in a year or two.
Anyway, the job isn't working with the children at all, I'm a complete skivvy.
Cleaning toilets, washing up, making tea with the occasional nappy change thrown in but that's all.
The girls are all late teens / early twenties and seem to have taken a disliking to me for no apparent reason.
I'm in my 30s married, boring and a frump really so am no threat to all these young pretty girls. I work hard and don't mind doing the things they don't like doing so I'm really upset to why they don't talk to me, answer me with one word answers and generally just ignore me.
When I walk into the staff room it goes completely quiet and some snigger.
If I just can't face it again tomorrow will I get paid for this week I have worked?
I wouldn't mind but it's been a dreadful week, and a bloody hard 30 hours of work so would actually be annoyed to not be paid for how miserable they've all made me but during the six month probation it says I must give a weeks notice / they must give a weeks notice so this is what's worrying me
Thanks for any help Guys!

OP posts:
user1493022461 · 07/05/2017 21:41

Your DD quit a job after a few days and then got her mummy to ring up and threaten them with a daily mail sad face and complain about bullies?

No wonder they call it the snowflake generation!

ArtemisiaGentilleschi · 07/05/2017 21:41

That you are even thinking of jacking it in after a week shows you either don't need it, or don't want it.
Everyone in every job feels a bit urgh at being the new kid. Because you are.
You presumably have a job description and a manager. Check the first and speak to the second if you're not happy.
Out of curiosity, what did you think you'd be doing in a creche?

Monkeyinshoes · 07/05/2017 21:42

It's hard going back to work after a break. I've just done it and keep swinging between liking it and hating it, feeling confident in my skills one minute and doubting myself and feeling like an imposter the next. I figure it's just what happens when there's a been a big change, it's going to take some getting used to.

Give it some more time, it'll be hard to find another job as convenient as this. It's just a job and, like you said, it'll be a good stepping stone to a better one.

BabytoBoris · 07/05/2017 21:43

As pp said if you are in breach of contract they can withhold the cost of emergency cover for your notice period. You should work your notice if you possibly can.

Secretsquirrelclub · 07/05/2017 21:43

I would just leave. You've given if a week, life is just too short to work with people that are going to make 30 hours of your week miserable. Make it clear why you are going when you hand in your notice.

ArtemisiaGentilleschi · 07/05/2017 21:44

Good lord Jane Eyre, was your daughter very embarrassed by you?
Could she not have asked where the loo was?

MammaTJ · 07/05/2017 21:45

Toughen up butter cup!! You are 30, they are teens. You can handle this and become their boss before long. The managers will notice who does the work and may promote you quickly, then look out!! Keep that in mind.

Do try to be involved in record keeping and planning though, as that is what will get you noticed even more.

Also, a lot of youngsters start this kind of work, then leave, there is a fast staff turnover!

Get your big girl pants on and face this challenge and beat it in style!

hollieberrie · 07/05/2017 21:46

I would just leave. You've given if a week, life is just too short to work with people that are going to make 30 hours of your week miserable. Make it clear why you are going when you hand in your notice

This. With bells on. Life's too short. I wouldnt even go in if it was me tbh.

scootinFun · 07/05/2017 21:46

Going back to work can be hard, and it doesn't sound like a brilliant fit for you. HOWEVER, stick it out and get some experience. Please do ask to speak to the manager. It doesn't seem right that you are doing all the scut work. However, as a pp said they may be more qualified. Don't just jack it in and give up. Even a month on a cv shows that you gave it a fair go.

junebirthdaygirl · 07/05/2017 21:48

Just decide that you are there to work not make friends. You will not get as good a set up with childminding next door. And one job leads to another. Get up tomorrow morning head up and into work. Be respectful do your job and l can gaurantee you within a month this will have turned around. If you have the right attitude.

Babyroobs · 07/05/2017 21:48

I would try to stick it out a bit longer, just get on with your work , act friendly to everyone and try not to let it get to you. there are bitchy people in every workplace. I've been in my current workplace 14 years and there are still bitchy cliques.

TinselTwins · 07/05/2017 21:48

OP would you deregister your kids from school after 1 week if they didn't like it and hadn't made any friends yet?

Nancy91 · 07/05/2017 21:49

I have walked out of a job without notice before, your employer can't withhold money for any time that you have worked. Obviously they won't pay you for any days that you haven't shown up but if you worked they have to pay you, breach of contract or not.

Secretsquirrelclub · 07/05/2017 21:49

Leave there is nothing they can do. They're not going to sue you for breach of contract, why on earth would a company initiate court proceeding against someone that's worked in a job for 1 week, presumably on minimum wage.
If you want paying and need to give notice, hand it in and phone in sick for the duration,
You don't need a reference from them. So fuck 'em go and find something better.

HSMMaCM · 07/05/2017 21:49

Take cakes on Monday. It might help. I would expect to be doing the full jobs for a while.

Want2bSupermum · 07/05/2017 21:52

I would not leave. Use this as a stepping stone to something better. My first job was like this. I toughened it out and managed to survive to six months. I started looking for a new role when I had five months of experience and left the day after I had six months. Best thing I ever did. Walked into a role that took me to amazing places that I never thought capable of.

Mrsmadevans · 07/05/2017 21:54

user1493022461 You are one horrible person

user1493022461 · 07/05/2017 21:55

Can everyone stop calling the other women bullies and bitches?

All they have done, according to the biased and obviously prickly OP, is not fall over themselves to be friendly to someone who thinks they are too good to do the work they were hired to. That's all.

Shopkinsdoll · 07/05/2017 21:57

Your DD quit a job after a few days and then got her mummy to ring up and threaten them with a daily mail sad face and complain about bullies?

No wonder they call it the snowflake generation!

Are you just looking for some sort of reaction? Yours answers are all the same.

Mrsmadevans · 07/05/2017 21:57

OP my dear I am so sorry you are being made to feel like this. I don't think you should go back at all in fact I think you should put in a complaint about the bullying to the manager. I have a feeling that you are not the only person to be treated like this. All the best my dear and Good luck in your hunt for a new job you sound lovely

SecretNetter · 07/05/2017 22:00

user1493022461 You are one horrible person

Sorry but although it was harshly worded, i agree with User tbh.

If your dd is old enough to work, she's old enough to not have mummy step in and shout at her boss for her. By all means help dd to talk through possible actions, compose an appropriate email etc...but to take over and phone on behalf of another adult (presumably) is just cringe.

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 07/05/2017 22:00

Oh lord . They are just mean and rather unkind sounding girls it's not bullying FFS it's just been ONE week . The amount of People who
Would bail over this is staggering and actually quite scary !

Don't you need The money OP ? Hang tight - you can do this 💐

user1493022461 · 07/05/2017 22:00

I'm just saying what the majority think when they read something like that.

TinselTwins · 07/05/2017 22:01

crying "bully" because you're disappointed to not have instant work bullies is a form of bullying IMO

Gazelda · 07/05/2017 22:02

Il be honest, I don't think the 'girls' sound like bullies. They're ignoring you, not trying to be friendly, not chatting, and talk amongst themselves. Could it possibly be that you're a bit self-conscious at the moment? Lacking in self confidence?
Maybe they think you are a bit stand-offish and probably know more than they do so feel a little threatened by you? Just a different perspective to consider.

Whether you stay or not depends on whether you need the money. It sounds like a very convenient job, so if it were me I'd try to stick it out and take time to get to know my colleagues a bit better.

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