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Original poster

Police Harassment

404 replies

Morgani97 · 06/05/2017 08:55

Desperate for some advice police,Long backstory to this. My 13 yro dd has been bullied at school for over a year,reported this to the school almost on a weekly basis yet nothing had been done. Cut a long story short dd began self harming last summer,her attitude was vile which i totally understand. However ive met a new partner who is lovely very patient and tolerant and gets on well with dd, She asked him to come along to parents evening which he did.After this there was an incident at school which resulted in dd being sent to isolation. The following day i decided to keep dd off school as she was upset about the day before. I rang the school twice and informed them she wasnt coming in and arranged a meeting for the following monday. I then went to a course i was enrolled in. I got a call from my partner telling me a teacher from the school along with a police officer and a cpso and had taken my daughter back to school. When i got home my partner informed me he had been questioned (not under caution) the police officer was offensive in his manner of questioning. I went to the school and picked my dd up she was extremely upset as she had heard everything that had been said. I put a complaint in to the school as was unsure why she had been taken back to school.Then yesterday the same police officer turned up at my home with two women who wanted to read out claires law to me ( i know all about my partners past and have no concerns) The day before a letter was delivered by hand to the school to the chairman of govenors which seems a bit of a coincidence .Again the people that turned up at our home were offensive and were asked to leave 7 times what the hell can i do w are all so upset about this which has stemmed from bullying. I should add that the bullying has been done by ten asian youths not that the creed or colour matters but obviously the school picked up on this .Sorry for the long post i just wanted to get all points across.

OP posts:
AwaywiththePixies27 · 06/05/2017 10:18

Claires Law has nothing to do with assaulting a police officer Confused

OP without outing myself, I'd be very very wary. Having known of a case many moons ago where a woman's children were removed because she wouldn't listen to their concerns about her new partner. Unbelievably she's still with him to this day.

TheGentleMoose · 06/05/2017 10:19

@PortCheese It depends on the risk, and the time it takes to run the information through a computer I suppose. However [and perhaps a police officer can correct me] I suspect the partner's name was share in a police system or between police offices and this is how the risk was identified in this case. Anyone can make a Clare's Law application.

AskBasil · 06/05/2017 10:19

You're not being a pedant, Saor, it's important to remember Clare.

So many women are murdered by men, it's impossible to remember them all. But we can at least remember the one whose murder led to the law which enables some women to keep themselves safe from violent men. It's right to point out that her name was Clare, it's right to remember that every single woman murdered by a man, was a real person, a real individual and remembering their names, is helping that IMO.

AwaywiththePixies27 · 06/05/2017 10:20

Sorry, *Clare's Law.

SaorAlbaGuBrath · 06/05/2017 10:20

AskBasil that's very true.

WomblingThree · 06/05/2017 10:21

OP, the point is, the crime he has told you about won't follow him for the rest of his life.

That's why everyone except you knows he's lying.

GriefLeavesItsMark · 06/05/2017 10:24

When my bil assaulted a police officer he got a fine, in mitigation it was an accident (he was trying to punch someone else) and he apologised immediately. He has always been an idiot.

JaneEyre70 · 06/05/2017 10:24

OP I'm going to be very blunt here. The Police and the School have access to information about your partner that you are choosing not to see. And that's one hell of a dangerous stand to take. That information has caused them serious concern. Enough so that they take your DD to school rather than leave her with your partner.
Given that information, there is a chance that social services are now involved and your DD may be put on at risk register.

Instead of complaining about your partner's "harassment" I think you need to deal with this and look after your DD not him.

FeralBeryl · 06/05/2017 10:25

Morgani please please go and speak to the police as planned.
Also - please keep posting here, do not disclose to him that you've talked about this until you have all the facts.
In the meantime - do not leave him unsupervised with DD. Protect you both.

People like this are very, very manipulative without you realising. Posters here have experience and can help you.
You will get people snapping at you, but it's just because they have lived through what you can't yet see.
Read all the threads atm about service cuts, your local police force have already dedicated quite a bit of time to this which suggests there's a lot more to it.
Stay safe Flowers

AwaywiththePixies27 · 06/05/2017 10:26

Everything womblingthree said.

Apairofsparklingeyes · 06/05/2017 10:26

I hope you're ok Morgan. It's difficult to accept that a man who can seem very kind and loving on the surface has a violent past but unfortunately that is the real him.

blueskyinmarch · 06/05/2017 10:26

What is a cpso? Is that a child protection social worker? If so then she has probably been taken back tot he school to be interviewed about some concerns regarding possible abuse. Possibly by your partner. If that is the case then either she has said something or your partner has been named as a suspect in another abuse type case and they are interviewing all children who have contact with him. Did your DD say what she was asked by them?

SuperintendentChalmers · 06/05/2017 10:29

I find the tiny reply from OP disturbing considering how many people have replied to her initial post. If it was me after all of this very eye opening advice I'd be telling him to do one.

AwaywiththePixies27 · 06/05/2017 10:29

What is a cpso?

Community Police Support Officer blueskyinmarch

AwaywiththePixies27 · 06/05/2017 10:32

Morgani97 how long did he say his prison sentence was?

flibberdy · 06/05/2017 10:33

Glad to read your update at 10:04, OP. Good luck. We are here to listen and advise if needed. Flowers

GriefLeavesItsMark · 06/05/2017 10:33

OP, you do understand if the parent of a known vulnerable child rocks up at a parenting evening with some complete fucking stranger playing dad,, there will be concerns. It is really hard to believe anyone could have so little insight.

StarryIllusion · 06/05/2017 10:37

Op I'd like to point out that if his offence was serious enough for them to be reading you Clare's Law and taking her to school under police guard then it was serious enough that they do not want him left alone with her. It is reasonable to say that if you will not protect her, they will. If you don't pull your head out of the sand you could lose your daughter. They don't take children out of their homes for nothing and she has already been removed from his care once. You do not do 4 years for hitting a police officer.

TheGentleMoose · 06/05/2017 10:38

I'e just reread the OP and I think, but obviously cannot know for certain, what has probably happened is when the police officer and the woman attended the house they would have ran the man's details through the computer system via the police radio.

That probably raised concerns and the daughter was returned to school.

The complaint to school probably triggered the application to Clare's Law being made under the assumption that the OP was not aware of any of the circumstances of her partner's previous convictions, or only partially aware of the circumstances.

blueskyinmarch · 06/05/2017 10:39

Awaywiththepixies27 Thanks. Obviously she wasn’t being joint interviewed then.

AwaywiththePixies27 · 06/05/2017 10:39

I do Grief. It's why any subsequent partners I've had since splitting with the Ex have never met my DCs. Not that I had any concerns but my DCs didnt need the complications. I saw a friend fall head over heels for someone he met the kids etc they split up three months later. Obviously when you know it's going to be long term of course it's fine.

OP I'm a bit concerned about the whole cross word thing. I bet his previous partner probably said the same when she first met him too.

TheGentleMoose · 06/05/2017 10:39

@StarryIllusion It may not have been "under police guard". It may just have been that the car at the house was the police car; I agree that clearly they thought school was the safer option than home at that point in time.

LedaP · 06/05/2017 10:41

*TheGentleMoose

I'e just reread the OP and I think, but obviously cannot know for certain, what has probably happened is when the police officer and the woman attended the house they would have ran the man's details through the computer system via the police radio.*

If this the case there are already major concerns about the Ops daughter. Police do not attend to a child not in school, when the mother has called school to advise them of this. There were already serious concerns at that point.

TheGentleMoose · 06/05/2017 10:42

With regards to 'cross words' - it is a totally normal and natural component of any safe relationship to display anger without being abusive. Anger is like all other emotions - they are fine to be displayed in a safe and controlled manner.

TheGentleMoose · 06/05/2017 10:44

@LedaP I do understand what you are saying, but I can think of other reasons the police would attend in this instance which do not involve the partner's past history.

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