To seriously hate that when you differ in opinions, you get accused of not having kids!

[DontPullThatTubeOut]

Ok so just that basically, I am so fucking tired of being told I "must not have children" because my opinion just happens to be different to theirs. Or for example, walking down the town today, a woman with a buggy nearly clips my heel I'm not bothered as I was crossing the street in front of her and went a bit diaganol to get to where I needed to, she looks at me and gives me an awful stare, so I question her as to what she's looking at. I say "why are you looking at me like that?" She replies she was looking into the shop next to me yet our eyes locked? So I said to her sure oh we're and went to carry on, her response "how can you talk to a woman with a child like that!" I said I do have two kids myself, she accused me of lying and said I wouldn't speak like that to her if I did, . So I said to her, just because you have a child with you does not mean I won't confront you if you give me a dirty look, just to clarify I would never start a fight in front of a child etc in fact I don't actually have fights and never have done, but I won't take a dirty look and not question it especially when she practically rammed her pram up the path at the crossing when there was no need as the lights were green.

Sorry for the rant but I'm just wondering if I'm the only one that hates being told they mustn't have kids because an opinion differs or I handle something differently to themselves.

If people are constantly doubting that you have children based on your views and behaviour, I'd maybe have a think about why that is?

'it's ok for someone to give a dirty look but not for someone else to question why? If that's the case fair enough, lesson learned.'

That is definitely the case is you're in England. It's the English way. Dirty looks, eye rolling, tutting and pointed sighing are all acceptable, passive aggressive responses to inconsiderate behaviour. Outright confrontation is taking it a step too far.

I'm worried my accent is making me sound worse than I am.

I'm not in England, however I did grow up in London. I've always questions really awful looks there as well, however I've never had that response but then again I was younger than 19 then.

The looking epidemic is spreading!!

Questioned*

Why do people dismiss a look so easily? My mum gave me looks as a child and it was terrifying, I don't like being deliberately stared at with a screwed up face.

Possibly that is because I'm from a rather rough part of the North mind...

Yep, if you do that in Middlesbrough, well it's best to have firm grip on your keys

Op I know what you mean. Someone disageees and the response is you obviously don't have children. Its weird. It implies that everyone with children agrees about everything and is often as insult, as if not having children invalidates your opinion and women are only valuable as mothers.

I am so fucking tired of being told I "must not have children" because my opinion just happens to be different to theirs

Just how often do you start arguments with strangers in the street that you can be sick of what can only be one of a variety of responses? How many people have said this to you? Must be an awful lot if you are that fucking sick of it. Maybe you should look at your own behaviour?

Starting a row with someone with a young child because they looked at you is pretty poor behaviour OP

Think OP is getting a hard time. I got tutted at last week (simply for being first at the tomato crate in Tesco). I actually apologised to her before thinking, hang on, why the fuck am I apologising, so I asked her why she tutted and after her shit response, I told her to get a grip.

I felt better and she may think twice about tutting people for simply existing next time.

You might as well have asked her "did ye spill my pint?"

Did confronting her make you feel any better? Are you walking a little taller for it?

I barely leave my house user I think I might just never leave it again.

HoHo you have explained it so much better than I could. Thank you.

Because looks may not be directed at anyone or anything. They can be an almost involuntary response to internal feelings and conflict and you just happened to catch her eye at an bad moment.

Thank you chloe

If t wasn't directed at me then why did she have her head turned towards me and her body turned away from me?

I don't appreciate the insults as I haven't given them to anyone else French

I am no out to insult you, I am trying to answer your question honestly. From what you have said, (though I appreciate that you've never got into a fight since childhood) you sound like one of those very aggressive, antagonistic defensive people who want to start on everyone who might accidentally look at you the wrong way.

You say the woman 'almost' clipped your heel. So, in other words, she didn't. In order for her to have looked at you in any way at all, you must have been huffing and puffing or showing your displeasure in some way, otherwise what was there for her to look at?

Why do some people make life such constant hard work for themselves? She was walking near you, she almost accidentally clipped you with the buggy, but she didn't, so no harm done. Yet you want to get into a row with her over it. Why?

It's uncool, not classy, not necessary and makes you sound common and aggressive. Most normal well balanced people would have just let it go. Accusing people of 'dirty looks' and saying you won't tolerate 'dirty looks' makes you sound like some sort of shrieking, brawling fishwife.

I'm sorry but it just does.

I barely leave my house user I think I might just never leave it again

Then how are you totally fucking sick of people saying this specific thing to you? Are you by any chance just slightly a huge amount exaggerating?

op this is a genuine question, is there something relevant you have not mentioned about yourself that means you are very trusting but also unsure about what people's reactions might mean, so you 'read' them wrong? its just on the face of it, you sound aggressive, but as you explain more, it sounds more like a general thing. I wouldnt like to see us all piling in on you and then it turns out there is another issue driving this behaviour.

I didn't et annoyed at all I carried on walking as normal, I have kids I know how it is pushing a pram I would never have a go about something like that because if she did clip my heel it would more than likely have been an accident.

user please read my post I assure you I have already explained what I meant.

Never once have I have experienced that I mustn't have children if I was behaving /talking that way, either before or since I had mine.

The only time I heard - or read - it , and agreed with it, was when people made huge judgments and declaration about parenting and children without having the first clue. I don't know, something like "all well behave toddlers eat their diner happily without any fuss if their parents are not lazy", things like that.

I think the correct etiquette for both parties would have been for both to apologise and both to say no, no my fault entirely.
You sound rude and aggressive with a real chip on your shoulders.

Well was there a shop window like she said?

painting I don't really know. I'm way too trusting and then I can also get quite defensive if I feel threatened. I'm not sure what it could be that would be relevant about myself? Maybe someone could tell me. I feel awful about this whole thing now and I feel extremely silly 😔