Absolutely beautiful woman joined our team four months ago. I was friendly but she made me so nervous I kept my distance a little bit so I didn't blush and make an idiot of myself. She was clearly not lesbian. She's incredibly feminine
-and has acrylic nails-. 
However she made an effort to be friendly and I decided to just make a new friend in work. She added me on Facebook last night and OMG!!!
On 'interested in' it says Women. She's been to every gay pride march since 2007
-not that I checked her Facebook that far back-
She volunteers at a LGBT charity for HIV positive gay men.
She doesn't seem to have had any girlfriends but she has said previously she's never had a relationship as she's never met the one and is fussy!
She's shared a poster that says 'when people say I don't look gay. Sorry I forgot to shower in rainbows and sprinkles this morning'.
So can I now assume she's lesbian? Or could she just be very involved in gay rights?
And how far out of your league does someone need to be before you don't even bother trying.
For reference, she looks like Megan Fox. I look like Melissa Ferrick!
AIBU?
Can I safely assume she's a lesbian now? Or shall I give up my dream and leave well alone
nowimqueer · 27/04/2017 15:45
Blatherskite I was wondering if anyone would notice.
I'm a comedic genius.
Well, maybe she's a lesbian but thinks your sense of humour is homophobic shite? 
And wouldn't want anyone with any type of long nails paying attention to my vulva.
Really? I've never been with a woman, but I'm well used to traversing my own terrain with long nails
CherryMintVanilla But one is in control of one's own brakes when one is traversing one's own terrain! Otherwise if things get a bit...energetic... you're but one thrusting talon from catastrophe 
I'm confused so if you have short nails that's the go ahead sign you are a lesbian?? I've always had short nails perhaps I've been kidding myself all these years or I'm incredibly naive 
'I would be more worried about her never having had a relationship.'
Why? She might not have met someone suitable, or maybe she likes just having flings. Flings can be fun. But none of this will EVER be known if the OP doesn't ask her out!! 
God OP, what a homophobe you are!
Pro tip though, be more careful never to say anything tongue in cheek, even if it is about your own community, any excuse to beat you over the head for even sarcastically acknowledging any kind of stereotype and be offended on others behalf.
I think just go for coffee and see how it goes, doesn't necessarily need to be a "hi I've noticed you're a lesbian, also a lesbian, shall we be lesbians together" conversation.
Good luck!
Guys guys guy- Short nails is a lesbian in joke- don't overthink it , OP was just making a joke. OP- I'd say go for it! You'll never know if you don't try
'Otherwise if things get a bit...energetic... you're but one thrusting talon from catastrophe shock'
Meh, injuries can happen in any setting. My worst involved a man and a shower rod that wasn't as strong as we thought. Ooops. The back of his head struck the tiles on the way down and mine I think struck either those or the ceramic tub as I went forward. The result was both of us in A&E in the early hours of Sun. morning in soaking clothes. Why lie, they've seen it all before? I skipped details at work, though, 'I fell over while drunk.' True enough .
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I'm confused so if you have short nails that's the go ahead sign you are a lesbian?? I've always had short nails perhaps I've been kidding myself all these years or I'm incredibly naive
Yes unfortunately you have been kidding yourself. I'm afraid you must divorce your husband or break up with your boyfriend immediately, and become a vegetarian. Your birkenstocks and flannel shirt are on their way to you now by first-class post. HTH.
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