To Think asking Teacher whether DC is showing signs of 11+ potential, I shouldnt be subjected to her personal opionion on the 11+!

[BlowingThroughTheJasmineinMyMi]

I can't believe this or maybe this is standard practise?

At PE asking teacher - at the moment is my child showing potential to sit the 11+, instead of being told - yes , no and comments on that I had to sit and listen to her personal views on the whole 11+

Eventually I was told - 11+ is 128 and your dd recent scores are 130 so YES.

Before I got that information I was told all about her 11+ days at school, the snobbery, how she didn't do it for her dc .

Blowing through, I don't know. Her primary school is an academy and typically has 3-4 pupils a year go into the grammar school in the neighbouring county. ( small school 1 class per year so about 10% achieve it).

I do think a lot of primary school teachers (in my experience) don't really like to comment on children's ability or relative ability.
DD1, A * student got pretty much the same comments from parents evening as DD2 ( very low ability). Had I not been a teacher and can judge for myself I would have been much less aware of where to Help my children aim.

I had a disapproving lecture from the acting SENCO at my son's school after she heard DS was taking the 11+. She basically told me that he couldnt cope with the work and pressure involved due to his dyspraxia and insinuated she thought I was cruel for 'allowing' him to do it.

The fact she had spoken to DS about twice ever, that he'd been the one who wanted to do it and that he passed it no problem with no tutoring or pressure from anyone was irrelevant, clearly.

You stated in your OP that 128+ was required for GS, not that it was national average. Level of cats of GS entrants must surely be far above national cats average, no?

State secondaries do not offer the same education as each other. I think that is understood There are different entry criteria for each one too - it's not as simple as being in the catchment. So you aren't just expected to go to the nearest one.

The entry criteria for the comprehensives in my area are all exactly the same unless religious so it is as simple as being nearest to the school (unless looked after or siblings already at the school).. They are also all meant to offer the same standard of education i.e. that is the aim.

Re entry I recognise that primary schools are hobbling their disadvantaged pupils by making out grammar is a bit dirty word.

Again you can't extrapolate a comment/opinion of one teacher to all primary schools. The grammar schools themselves don't want those who take the entrance exams to have been tutored and they or LEAs may have passed this message on to primary schools. Do you seriously think that is because they think "grammar is a bit dirty word"?