to call them stupid (rant! i wouldnt really)

[Verticalvenetianblinds]

Ds is nearly 2, and doesn't tolerate dairy. This isn't a problem until we go out to eat. Often choose locally run places, tend to lean towards to the organic/vegetarian/homemade type places as that's my preference. He'll eat anything so often shares mine, which I ask for with no butter. But recently hes decided hes a big boy now and doesn't want to share. This is an example of a regular and annoying occurrence:
He loves scrambled egg so I asked for that at a local cafe. Asked if it was possible to just scramble the egg, no milk or butter added -no problem she said. I went on to explain he doesnt eat dairy and she hesitated... I thought she was going to worry about cross contamination but no. Her question was 'but eggs are dairy'

Now my aibu is everytime this happens (which is half the time and we go out a couple of times a week) can I just smile and remind them of basic animal knowledge?
I'm sure there must be a witty reply I can use without making them feel dense.
(but seriously where the actual fuck do they think eggs come from?)

The other ones people get wrong are potatoes and baked beans.

What do they get wrong about them?

I haven't tried him goats or sheeps milk (happy with the milk of nuts at the moment) and yes we've tried the ladder several times and we're under a dietician consultant

Richmond Foods, Mailonline, most "ice cream" doesnt have any dairy its different fats, like coconut oil/

When you think about it, it is very obvious that eggs are not dairy but I am also of an age where eggs were counted as such with regard to nutrition etc.

Also if you are eating in vege/vegan places I would also maybe think no dairy to mean vegan rather than having a food allergy. Clutching at straws a bit, but maybe you need to spell out the intolerance rather than it being a dietary choice?

It's a common mistake I made myself until I went vegan and got cleft after asking for no dairy! In my mind egg has always been grouped in with dairy.

YABU. Just say no milk or butter.

They put potatoes and baked beans both in vegetables

Potato are a carb

Baked beans a protein. But the tomato sauce is confusing.

And pizza goes in the middle as it has foods from all the food groups and is a good food to eat.
Everyone puts it in the fats oils and sugars group.

Egg not cleft!

And I should add that I never thought eggs were from cows it's because eggs are always grouped as dairy and I just thought they came under the umbrella of 'dairy' as it's just a word after all.

You situation is like me saying 'vegan please' and then saying back (as the often do) 'can you eat fish?'

Some people are idiots.

I feel your pain. The lack of basic knowledge is shocking. My DD is allergic to dairy and eggs. I specify this every time we eat out...I now start to list...that means milk, cheese, butter, margarine - I always mention mayo...the number of times mayo that shows up (after me saying she's allergic to eggs) is infuriating.

So many people don't understand where food comes from.

YABU to be so intolerant of others. Not everyone has need to learn all about what's what and people assume that eggs are dairy because they're in the same spot as the milk and butter at the supermarket.

Baked beans a protein. But the tomato sauce is confusing.

That reminds me of my diabetic nurse, a so-called professional, who suggested to me that tins of baked beans were fine to eat because of the protein in the beans. I was as polite as possible when I pointed out the huge amount of sugar and salts in the tomato sauce that made them completely unsuitable for a diabetic! But I shouldn't be surprised, this was the same woman who previously told me lentils were good for diabetics so I should buy Heinz lentil soup!! Considering her day job was advising diabetics, she had a very poor grasp of all the harmful additives in tinned food!

Myself and both my DC are milk intolerant, people's faces when i say no milk or soya milk please, feel like I have to say it's allergies not me being fussy

As a lactose-intollerant person, I come up against this question so often. My response is usually the same as yours.

One time, I was ordering a steak and asked for it to be dairy free (i.e. not cooked with butter as so often they are). The waiter gave me a blank look and said with total sincerity "but beef comes from cows". I had no response for that one! 😂😂😂

My MIL and one of my BIL's are dairy intolerant. MIL can have eggs but BIL can't. So I may well fall foul of the same mistake as the lady in the cafe - although if you (as a customer) had specifically ordered scrambled eggs without milk or butter, I would assume you knew what you were talking about and not question it. Although I was listening to an article on local radio yesterday about the department at the LA who inspect food premises and rate them. He was saying that if you order a takeaway thent he person taking the order should specifically request if anyone the food is for has any food allergies. Never had tht happen.

So many people don't understand where food comes from.

Which is fine for the majority of the population unaffected by allergies etc., but is really pretty basic knowledge that any worker dealing with food, such as cooks, waiters, food shop assistants etc should know.

Wait, white chocolate isn't chocolate?

No one actually thinks eggs come from cows or are made of milk.

Food group charts often used to show eggs in with milk products, away from meat.

Some food group charts count butter in with fats, not dairy...

Be specific about what your child can't eat and stop looking for opportunities to be superior to people you need co-operation from.

My first thought was that she was being sweet and trying to point out that eggs might be bad for him. So you'd be being unreasonable to be mean about it. I do get though, that you'd be a bit sick of hearing the same thing every time you go out!

Dairy and egg allergies often go hand in hand (as told to us by the consultant and then NHS dietitian who were caring for my daughter) hence why people probably ask.

My daughter was allergic to dairy and egg along with others (fortunately grew out of them) however if my other child has friends over and they have dairy allergy (a couple do) then I always double check on the egg front, I would much rather check than to cause a child to become ill.

I'm amazed that schools have been teaching that eggs are dairy.
#TrumpAlternativeFacts

Oh and in answer to your question, yes YABU to rant about people actually wanting to ask to make sure they don't make your child sick.

Of course, treaclesoda! How could I have forgotten. Yes, orange juice is dairy too.

Be specific about what your child can't eat and stop looking for opportunities to be superior to people you need co-operation from.

I'd say it was the waitress who was trying to be superior in the OP's case. By making out that she knew best by questioning the order by saying eggs are dairy, as if the OP was too stupid to realise what an egg is. She ordered scrambled eggs, so that's pretty clear what she wanted, then said dairy free, which is pretty clear she wanted the eggs without any dairy products. It's not the OP who was trying to be superior. The waitress should have just taken the order.

I have honestly never seen eggs in a fridge with dairy in the supermarket. In most of the ones I go to regularly eggs are next to sugar and flour.