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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think she should have informed me her kids are unvaccinated?

420 replies

InMemoryOfSleep · 20/04/2017 08:24

I went to antenatal yoga with a lovely teacher, who then visited my house with her two children once my baby was born. I also attended her baby group several times with my DS, and her children were also present.

I've just found out that she's an anti-vaxxer, and I cannot stop thinking about the fact that she exposed my tiny baby to her unvaccinated kids, without my knowledge! AIBU to think she should have informed me before bringing her kids to my house, knowing my baby was too young to have been vaccinated yet?

And what about all the babies at the group - I get that it's her personal choice to not vaccinate (though I am vehemently against it) but as she is acting in a professional capacity surely she should be informing parents that her unvaccinated children will be there? I certainly would have thought twice about taking my DS before his vaccinations.

OP posts:
bumbleymummy · 21/04/2017 12:11

Thanks ginger.

muckypup73 · 21/04/2017 12:17

Look at the death rate in countries where they do not have vaccinations, that says it all!

befuddledgardener · 21/04/2017 12:24

My kid had the mmr but still had the mumps aged 9

GreatFuckability · 21/04/2017 12:30

Great - I am v surprised that any parent would expose their child to measles IRL. It's very easy to say online from the safety of a country/area where there are no outbreaks due to high uptakes of vaccination, of course. And it's surprising that your daughter's reaction wasn't on her medical records for the surgeon to see - when I was in a&e with gallstones recently, they even knew about my cat allergy?

As I said, I live where there was a measles outbreak. nothing 'online safety' about that. I just got on with my life.
Also, it was a different child who the reaction from the one who needed surgery. My eldest had the reaction and then i chose that no more of my children were having it. It was my youngest child who had the injury needing the surgery that was delayed because some a&e doctor was more worried about a pretty miniscule risk of tetanus (and giving her a vaccine that is worthless AFTER injury anyway) than getting her surgery that could potentially save a limb. The surgeon completely agreed with me that the a&e doctor was swinging his dick and made a complaint about the situation as he was so angry.

gingerpusscat · 21/04/2017 12:30

Look at the death rate in countries where babies are birthed in filthy conditions, where children are forced to drink water from wells laced with excrement, where children play alongside raw sewage, where children suffer profound malnutrition. I rather suggest that says at least something.

GreatFuckability · 21/04/2017 12:36

GreatFuckability if someone declined to get their appendix removed when in the midst of appendicitis, they'd be dead, not fannying around with Bach Flower remedies

But at least they wouldn't take anyone else with them

So, all those antivax/top shot Google-jockeys on this thread - have you ever had an operation? Will you refuse all qualified medical help if you develop peritonitis because a bottle of Bachs Flower remedies, sharp kitchen knife and you'll be fine mate?

yes, I'm aware they'd be dead, I know how appendicitis works. but my point is that is their choice, and one they are allowed to make.

I've never taken a bach flower remedy in my life. but yes i've had surgery, lots of it. What does that have to do with it? I have medical interventions when I feel they are the right thing for me, when they are not, I don't. I'm pretty sure thats how everyone does it, right? I'm not seeing what point you're making there.

GreatFuckability · 21/04/2017 12:42

Applebite You say you nearly died from measles, and so 'of course' your dd is up to date on her vaccinations. Fair point. Were i you with your experience, then i'd likely do the same. But my child nearly died from vaccination, so from MY POV, 'of course' i'm not going to give my children something that nearly killed their sister.
See? Experiences shape opinions. that's what my point is here.

gingerpusscat · 21/04/2017 12:44

I can never understand the criticism of those who use search engines. Surely its not the method of research which is problematic, but the quality of what is unearthed? Google Scholar, anyone?

Atenco · 21/04/2017 12:54

What countries are those, muckypup73 ?

I would imagine that a country that doesn't have vaccines also does not have basic medical services and that people suffer food poverty.

Regarding the news on the BBC about the drug that causes birth defects in France, that was dismissed as fake news, what about the mesh used in gynaecology by the NHS that is reported on mumsnet?

A lot of people cite the erradication of smallpox as proof that all vaccines are a good idea. But, IMHO, there is less and less vigilance of pharmaceutical companies and they are well known for being less than honest.

It is hard call to make for a parent. I vaccinated my own dd back in the day, I wouldn't do it again with the current schedule.

hottotrotsky · 21/04/2017 16:43

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Original poster
InMemoryOfSleep · 21/04/2017 16:49

No tattoos required @hottotrotsky - I posted as an AIBU and I think I've got my answer, as the majority of people seem to think I was being perfectly reasonable. Nonetheless, thank you for your comments Hmm

OP posts:
InMemoryOfSleep · 21/04/2017 16:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bumbleymummy · 21/04/2017 17:04

I thought it was a fairly even split actually...

Original poster
InMemoryOfSleep · 21/04/2017 17:15

@bumbleymummy I think it was more that several people who were anti-vaccination were posting several times... either way, those who were pro-vaccination clearly had the more reasoned and evidence based arguments.

OP posts:
chitofftheshovel · 21/04/2017 17:27

Live and let live.

bumbleymummy · 21/04/2017 17:53

There were plenty of pro-vaccine people who thought you were being unreasonable and over reacting.

hottotrotsky · 21/04/2017 18:11

Sorry op. You're spot on re shill. Let's say you sound a tad off your trolley then as opposed to shilly.

Exactly so bumbley.

Charlieismydarlin · 21/04/2017 18:11

apple do you really not question professionals?! Really?

I guess this points to such polarised opinions on this page.

Perhaps I have learnt the hard way, but I'm afraid that mentality is no longer sensible. I won't bore you with my personal experiences but i question every time. What is the evidence? Is the medicine necessary? What are the risks?

I did chuckle when my own GP privately admitted his pregnant wife had also declined the flu jab.

Don't be a sheep!

specialsubject · 21/04/2017 18:15

Twist those words. No one is saying that the eradication of small pox means all vaccines are a good idea.
It is that they are usually a far lower risk than the disease.

Be bloody grateful that we don't have to make this decision for small pox.

hottotrotsky · 21/04/2017 18:16

"Those who were pro vaccination clearly had the more reasoned and evidence based arguments"?? Does that include the cunting and twatting vile language that you endorsed? Oh dear. Really awful thread and you go down as one of the most negative ops ever.

kali110 · 21/04/2017 18:26

You sound like a hate filled irrational loon who wants unvaccinated kids to go round with it tatooed on their foreheads.
Nope, really i don't think the op sounds like a loon at all Confused
Let's just insult her without making much of a point though Hmm

kali110 · 21/04/2017 18:27

Wow hot are you always this nasty to people you don't agree with, or is it just because op vaxxes?

GreatFuckability · 21/04/2017 18:34

I think there are some irrational and nasty posts from people on both sides of this arguement. as there are always is. I'm not an anti-vaxxer or a pro-vaxxer. (why the fuck is there is a double X in that anyway?) I'm simply a mother who wants whats best for my child, the same as 99.9% of other parents. the mud-slinging, name-calling and snideness detracts from what could actually be an informative, interesting conversation.

Original poster
InMemoryOfSleep · 21/04/2017 18:35

Pretty sure that having a different opinion to you @hottotrotsky doesn't make me 'the most negative op ever' Hmm in fact, I'm not sure I've been negative about anything except the opinions of anti-vaxxers. And swearing doesn't invalidate an otherwise perfectly logical and evidence-based argument; ranting about conspiracies and internet 'evidence' however does.

OP posts:
kali110 · 21/04/2017 18:45

the most negative op ever
coming from the poster whose only contribution is negative and downright offensive Grin

great yes why is there two xx in vaxxer?? It annoys me!