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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU with my friends?

999 replies

PhyllisNights · 19/04/2017 21:24

I'm the first one in my social group to get pregnant. I talk to my friends on a daily basis through WhatsApp and see them all in person at least once a week.

As it's my first pregnancy, I'm very excited. I can't stop talking about it. I'm so lucky, so happy, so fortunate & so privileged. My baby feels so special, like I know my baby will do something incredible in this world - I can feel it!!

And yet, my friends have started to turn on me. They've become very jealous. They make snide remarks, they mimick me & give me side eye. I feel like my pregnancy is the butt of all the jokes.

I can't help that I've been so blessed and so fortunate to get pregnant out of my friends first. I went to college, uni, started a professional career first & got married first. I've just always been up step ahead - I can't help it!!

Would it be unreasonable to sit my friends down and ask them to stop being so negative? I want to ask them to support me better and help me out.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
DavetheCat2001 · 19/04/2017 23:04

I wish I had a kitchen big enough for an island sad face

ChestyNut · 19/04/2017 23:06

A slight headache and wound up, you'll be having an attack of the vapours next Grin

Crapuccino · 19/04/2017 23:07

Revising back to four out of ten.

In the movie that will come out of this thread, OP, can I suggest that you get Reese Witherspoon to reprise your role, maybe taking inspiration from her Legally Blonde role?

SnowBodyforrrrm · 19/04/2017 23:07

Oh comeone everyone, give the OP a break. Surely you can all read between the lines, OP has been blessed, as was the Virgin Mary, with the second coming of Christ.

You can't blame her for being a touch excited that she laid back to think of England and ended up so darn lucky before all her poor friends.

imagine how PFB she would be were she real

Smeaton · 19/04/2017 23:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bluebell28 · 19/04/2017 23:09

You're pregnant. . Oh my days there's a star in the East

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 19/04/2017 23:09

I can guarantee they are bored shitless! On the plus side you won't have to worry about their comments for much longer as one by one they will drift away

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 19/04/2017 23:10

Pregnancy bores are the dullest kind

Only1scoop · 19/04/2017 23:10

If this is for real
Then you sound like a complete nausebox

GinAndTunic · 19/04/2017 23:12

Do you think that one of the three magi will bring the OP a new kitchen instead of gold, frankincense or myrrh, Bluebell?

Flumpernickel · 19/04/2017 23:14

"upcoming pregnancy"

Erm... sorry OP, but I thought you were already pregnant? Confused

peachgreen · 19/04/2017 23:15

OP, if you're for real, you're vile. Especially the judgey part about whether or not your friends are trying hard enough to conceive. No wonder they're sick of you.

Smeaton · 19/04/2017 23:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Crapuccino · 19/04/2017 23:17

OP is the first to be both currently pregnant, and about to get pregnant again, flump. She's just always been "up step ahead" like that. She can't help being such an overachiever.

GaelicSiog · 19/04/2017 23:17

How far along are you, OP? Honestly, unless you're 9 months gone, they probably just want to ask a quick question about your pregnancy and move on to normal stuff you do together. And it sounds like you may be doing enough filling them in that they don't feel the need to ask.

(I'm the youngest of 10 siblings. All bio. I love all my nieces and nephews, but I won't lie, the first pregnancy was exciting, the next few were exciting ish, now it's fairly mundane. And that's my siblings.)

Willow2017 · 19/04/2017 23:19

Phyllis

On the extremely slim chance you are actually for real and so self involved you dont understand what is wrong with everything you said so far...

Read your opening post.

Its the most self absorbed, self praising, self pitying, nonsensical read I have seen for a long time.

Then you might see why you are not getting the "there there hun, they are just being beaiches" "#bossmum you are rocking it, you are 'first' in everything they are just well jell" crap.

If thats how you talk to your friends and even want to tell them how to support you and help you out then I am not surprised they have switched off.
What do you need them to do? You are pregnant, you arent ill! You seem to see everything as a 'race' its not, no-one cares what you do 'first' get over yourself woman! You are peeved that nobody has acknowleged how bloody amazing you are to have managed to get pregnant with this miracle baby thats going to be so much better than all the other babies in the world.

Original poster
PhyllisNights · 19/04/2017 23:20

Upcoming birth. Sorry, I'm just so aggravated by some of these comments. As if my friends hadn't upset me enough, I feel like I'm having to justify myself to a bunch of strangers on here. I thought this place was supposed to be a support network for expectant mothers and actual mothers, not a horrible free for all of making fun at someone's expense.

As for that comment regarding Legally Blonde, what a horrible misogynistic comparison to make. And Gwyneth Paltrow too? A woman who seems to get it in the neck for promoting a healthy lifestyle? She's a proud homemaker, she's not doing anybody any harm.

OP posts:
Flumpernickel · 19/04/2017 23:20

crap GrinGrin

BlondeBecky1983 · 19/04/2017 23:21

If this is a serious thread then I imagine your friends are reacting like they are because you are coming across as very annoying and superior. I imagine it's ten fold in real life so I'm not surprised that you have found yourself as the butt of your friend's jokes. Your friends might personally think of nothing worse than being pregnant. As others have said, it's only really exciting for those directly involved.

BlondeBecky1983 · 19/04/2017 23:21

Friends'

Only1scoop · 19/04/2017 23:21

Will you call the DC Apple?

livefornaps · 19/04/2017 23:22

Aw don't worry hun, your bubz your rules! Welcome to the mummy hun club, the BEST CLUB THERE IS, as long as you're prepared to actually put the work in and not hang around your granite worktop getting pissed up on barcardi breezers & giving side-eue

Illstartexercisingtomorrow · 19/04/2017 23:23

I've actually wound up with some anxiety from here tonight. I came on here to let off some steam and to get some advice. I didn't come on here for people to take the utter piss with comments about kitchens and marking my posts out of ten.

If you are real then you seriously seriously need to start talking to a counsellor about your self awareness and attitude to others. I'm not surprised your friends feel contempt towards you. It is incredibly insensitive, arrogant and selfish to specifically mark out your good luck before your friends have got there. You seem to not want to be unpleasant but you really are. Get help. You will be incredibly lonely after having a baby.

SnowBodyforrrrm · 19/04/2017 23:23

Perhaps your friends feel it's time to consciously uncouple from the friendship. People grow apart, it happens.

headinthecloud · 19/04/2017 23:23

Some of these comments have made my day. Sorry OP but I would be sick of you too if I'm being honest.

As an aside can someone explain what they mean by reverse.