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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Welsh wedding invitation.

653 replies

Spikeyplant · 18/04/2017 22:39

Just as it says in the title really.

My DH has a significantly younger relative who is getting married this summer. We have just received an invitation to the wedding, written entirely in Welsh. Neither DH or I speak Welsh and the bride and groom are well aware of this.

I am totally cool with somebody who grew up in a Welsh first language family wanting to celebrate their wedding in their language. However I can't help feeling it is a bit rude to send out invitations in a language many guests can't understand without even a short note in a mutually spoken language.

AIBU?

OP posts:
klondikecookie · 23/04/2017 19:51

I'd imagine most who grew up in Wales on the last 30 years can count to ten in Welsh and know a few colours. I do find it staggering that someone could grow up in Wales and not know a single Welsh word though (unless they're blind maybe).

DoorwayToNorway · 23/04/2017 19:57

No but your child can if they are immersed in it everyday. They get to a point where they understand and can read and your endless typing into translate isn't needed. Plus the more homework questions I saw, the more I retained too. I didn't work for the first year and learnt very little. It's very possible to live in another country and learn nothing. When I was teaching in the USA and London there were plenty of Spanish, Somalian, Portuguese and Arabic speaking parents that had lived in the country for decades but needed translators for parents evenings. Also maths is maths is maths. The one subject most people can do if they use the decimal number system in their own language. Unless Welsh has a different number system, of course, and then you have a point.

TittyGolightly · 23/04/2017 19:59

The old Welsh number system counted in 8 (hence "wythnos" for week). But that's not routinely used now.

BestIsWest · 23/04/2017 20:00

Out of interest, overbyyer, which bit of Wales did you grow up in? Maybe it wasn't a nationwide policy.

DressMeUpInStitches · 23/04/2017 20:16

Maths was an example door He was emersed in Welsh from a young age. Welsh playgroups, welsh private nursery from 9months when I started back at work (for nhs cadwalader, I don't need welsh for my job), cylch meithrin, 2yrs in Welsh primary schools.
He had no issues learning the language, but he struggled having his education in that language as it wasn't his 1st.
He is in yr 5 now and doing much much better than I imagine he would do in a predominently welsh speaking school. He's still learning welsh in school now, just not having hos education in it.
This is the issue I have. Why is there a choice between counties? Why not have an english medium & a welsh medium option? Why one or the other dependent on where you live?

klondikecookie · 23/04/2017 20:18

Why not have an english medium & a welsh medium option?
Funding I'd assume.

TittyGolightly · 23/04/2017 20:23

I think it's tradition, actually.

Gwenhwyfar · 23/04/2017 20:28

The democratic will of the people of Gwynedd, as expressed through their county council, is to have primary school education through the medium of Welsh. Anyone moving to Gwynedd can find this out very easily before they move. Anyone who's grown up in Gwynedd will know it already. At secondary school the children, who are all bilingual by then, have options about what language to take their subjects in. This option wouldn't be available to a child from a non-Welsh speaking family had they not gone through immersion in Welsh at primary.

OvariesBeforeBrovaries · 23/04/2017 20:29

There isn't the demand for it Dress. So many schools in the area are closing down because there aren't enough children in the area to keep them open; English or Welsh-speaking.

Moving from Gwynedd to Wrexham was a revelation - going from every school being Welsh medium to suddenly having the choice between English and Welsh. I've just applied for DD's school places down by Llanelli and was surprised again, down there she has the choice between Welsh medium, English medium, Dual Stream, transitional etc.

She's going to an English-medium with a heavy focus on learning and using Welsh through play, imagination and conversation rather than through the entire curriculum being in Welsh, which I think will benefit her more. The aim is still for children to leave school bilingual (and DD almost certainly will as we alternate languages at home frequently), but it's done in a more gentle way.

I agree that Gwynedd is too rigid in its education language policies, but I think it's just circumstantial. Areas are too rural for them to tell parents "travel three villages across if you want English medium", and the overwhelming majority of parents in the county want Welsh medium language for their children.

I started cylch meithrin at 3, having just moved from the West Midlands, with non-Welsh-speaking parents who have tried but have never really learned the language. I ended up fluent in Welsh, did first-language Welsh GCSE etc. It isn't completely impossible but probably depends on the child.

Willyoujustbequiet · 23/04/2017 20:30

Secretnetter

Yes because no one in the whole country could have possibly had a different experience to you Hmm

I know who has their head up their arse and it isnt my dp

OverByYer · 23/04/2017 20:31

I'm not saying where I live West youll all be coming after me with a pitchfork.
Fair to say I live in the least Welsh of all the counties.

NotDavidTennant · 23/04/2017 20:33

Stats on the number of Welsh speakers in each local authority area here

The percentage of Welsh speakers in Cardiff is 11.1% and Swansea is 11.4%. If you're hearing Welsh spoken regularly in either city you're moving in quite specific circles.

AntigoneJones · 23/04/2017 20:33

oh yes overbyer, everyone in the rest of Wales will be rushing down to Cardiff or wherever with pitchforks, seeking out someone called 'overbyyer'
how is that bara brith and paned going down? :)

Willyoujustbequiet · 23/04/2017 20:35

Overbyyer

My dp is similar to you with his knowledge of Welsh or indeed complete and total lack of it . Strangely enough though he uses your user name as a phrase all the time Grin

Whereismumhiding2 · 23/04/2017 20:38

Wow, this thread is still going. I'd be delighted to get a Welsh invite and Google translate it MD translate my reply. And i suspect the whole wedding might be in Welsh, parts of which i might be able to look up!

Good for them, I'd go anyway if i wanted to be there, and pretend I understood! And admit if i didn't! I'd be all, i got lost, so you all married now cos if not i threw my Confetti too early 😂😂😂

BestIsWest · 23/04/2017 20:40

Lol, Over, no I won't! I had thought it was universally taught but just googled and it was only taught in about 60% of secondary schools, less in primary until it became compulsory around 1990.

I grew up near Swansea so not exactly a hub of Welshness either. I don't speak it fluently because my grandmother (a very strong character) persuaded my parents Welsh Language education was a bad idea and gradually it got dropped at home too. My parents and grandparents were fluent speakers.

DressMeUpInStitches · 23/04/2017 20:40

That is my thinking too ovaries I moved to gywnedd from conwy at 21 for a job. Not even considering children in my move.
I think we have done the best for ds. He will still speak Welsh, but he will fo better in his education too.

I think you're right about the reasons why gwynedd is different in its teaching to other areas. I know many many 1st language welsh speakers. They also spoke english though, which is why it's difficult to learn as an aduly. English is the default

OverByYer · 23/04/2017 20:48

I live near the border west.

OverByYer · 23/04/2017 20:50

Willyoujustbequiet
Your OH prob from same area as me.
Welsh language just didn't feature growing up.

Gwenhwyfar · 23/04/2017 21:02

"The percentage of Welsh speakers in Cardiff is 11.1% and Swansea is 11.4%. If you're hearing Welsh spoken regularly in either city you're moving in quite specific circles."

Not at all. If you go shopping in Cardiff you walk past thousands of people. It makes sense that some of those would be speaking Welsh. 11% doesn't mean you never hear it!

TittyGolightly · 23/04/2017 21:13

So that's Newport or caerleon or Abergavenny/UK's type area. 🤔

TittyGolightly · 23/04/2017 21:13

*usk.

thatstoast · 23/04/2017 21:19

Last time I went to soft play in Cardiff (Parc, not Park) there were lots of children and parents speaking Welsh. I think it's become quite aspirational in South Wales.

Stopyourhavering · 23/04/2017 21:34

My 3 dcs were all educated in Welsh speaking primary school and could be considered bilingual( I'm from Scotland originallyand had my doubts about the usefulness of learning Welsh)....the ability to speak more than 1 language has certainly helped dd1 in her job hunt as an English teacher in China where's she's had numerous job offers! .... she's completing an MSc in linguistics at RG uni ( not in Wales) but her upbringing/ education certainly made her stand out against competitors ....diolch

stretchedturtleneck · 23/04/2017 21:59

Willyoujustbequiet
Sorry, but either you are being hyperbolic that your husband only knows 'cwtch' or he must have his head up his ass.

My Welsh knowledge is basic at best, but I'd have to be pretty ignorant not to know what the national anthem is called, or to have failed to notice bilingual road markings and signage.