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AIBU?

about changing a nappy on a cafe table?

340 replies

Catsize · 18/04/2017 19:07

So, I usually grab something quick and cheap for lunch but decided to treat myself to a nice baked spud in an art gallery cafe.

Half way through said spud, and perusing MN, I looked up to see that the people on the table nearby were changing a baby's nappy on the table where they'd just eaten.

My face must have been a bit of a picture because one of the women looked at me as if to say 'what?'. Feeling I had to justify myself, I said 'it's just that it's a bit grim changing a baby's nappy on a cafe table'.

The woman doing the changing asked if I was a mum. Instead of saying 'what difference would that make?', I said I had two children. She said she didn't realise I was watching(?). I said it was more of a hygiene thing, but yes, it had put me off my lunch somewhat.

She replied that it was 'only a bit of wee'.

So, was I being unreasonable hygiene thing and it is 'only a bit of wee', or is this utterly grim?

For clarity, this was in an area out of sight of the staff and I was the only other customer in that area.

The loos were ten paces away, full changing facilities and pristine.

OP posts:

Report

archersfan22 · 18/04/2017 19:55

I suspect the actual biological hazard of changing a wee nappy on a cafe table is minimal - putting a phone or tablet on the table is probably worse!

However I still wouldn't do it....

apotheke · 18/04/2017 19:58

Totall grim. Back in my teenage waitressing days someone even left a folded up nappy on the table alongside their used cups and plates for me to clear away. Utterly disgusting.

Somehow I have managed to bring up 2 babies without resorting to this. Have used mat on the floor of pub/cafe bathrooms, the ground/grass outside and the buggy reclined rather than ever being so rank.

Catsize · 18/04/2017 20:03

apotheke

Unreal...

OP posts:

FairytalesAreBullshit · 18/04/2017 20:04

Annie if the facilities are not clean, then you raise awareness, state you need to change baby, staff deal with the situation. Child is held or in buggy with carer, till rectified.

We're talking baby changing facilities not Michelin starred restaurants. It doesn't matter a jot if you perceive the facilities to be good, if the changing table is clean, it's open for business. If cleanliness is in question, I refer you to the first paragraph.

Kelsoooo · 18/04/2017 20:04

Grim.
At soft play yesterday, a family got up and left and the staff went to clear the table.
They'd been left a ...Gift....Of a used nappy. Not even in a bag. that was awful. Felt so bad for the poor young girl having to pick it up.

MrsKoala · 18/04/2017 20:06

Apotheke, when i worked as a waitress someone left a an open pooey nappy on a plate of leftover food on a table for me to clear away. That was disgusting but i don't think it's the same.

dontbesillyhenry · 18/04/2017 20:09

MrsKoala I bet everyone just felt really awkward. MN meet or not it's really bad manners. You can get portable change mats so why did you see the need to use a bloody table? And did you wash your hands after if there were no facilities?

seven201 · 18/04/2017 20:09

At the weekend I changed my 10 month dd's nappy in the picnic area (on the grass) because I couldn't be bothered to walk to the toilets that weren't really that far away. It really didn't occur to me that it might offend anyone. Just a wee and not right by any food. Now I'm worried I annoyed people . The cafe table is worse obviously.

dontbesillyhenry · 18/04/2017 20:10

Sorry Mrs k but you don't HAVE to turn up to nct meets if you are struggling and it means acting revolting

Crispsheets · 18/04/2017 20:11

Low standards.

Mummyoflittledragon · 18/04/2017 20:12

I thought there was a big thing about it not being legal to change nappies in the eating areas if restaurants/cafes. It happened maybe 8/10 yrs ago.

MrsKoala · 18/04/2017 20:14

I did put a changing mat on the table. There was no floor space at all. The toilet was just a cubicle. Yes i washed my hands. It was the others who suggested it when i said 'oh cack there's nowhere to change dd'. Everyone laughed at precious MNers. I don't think anyone felt uncomfortable. I'll ask them. Hold on...

Bubbinsmakesthree · 18/04/2017 20:14

I've changed a pooey nappy on chair in a coffee shop before - there were no toilets, never mind changing facilities. Did it as discretely and quickly as possible. Sometimes needs must. On a table when there's perfectly good facilities available - unnecessary and unreasonable!

Areyoulocal · 18/04/2017 20:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HoldBackTheRain · 18/04/2017 20:15

My son has been diagnosed with OCD. When accompanying him to various assessments, I realised I too have it but never been officially diagnosed. So I was always going to be stressed out about this, I'm just so glad it's not just me!

dontbesillyhenry · 18/04/2017 20:16

Bubbins that's rank. Could you not have at least left the building and found somewhere? Talk about trampy

TessTube · 18/04/2017 20:18

I can't see the huge problem with what Mrs Kosla did, on an empty table in a corner with no other facilities when she's checked with people and cleaned it afterwards?

Don't be mean.

It's very different to whopping a baby onto a table in a cafe full of strangers which had facilities available.

We've all had to do less than ideal things in a pinch but there's no real reason I can see for the cafe business.

TessTube · 18/04/2017 20:20

No real need for calling people trampy and revolting don'tbesilly.

Just gratuitous rudeness.

SquatBetty · 18/04/2017 20:20

Changing nappy in a picnic area - fine if it's on your own picnic blanket or on the grass

Changing a nappy on a cafe table that others will use is just manky and grim

Gileswithachainsaw · 18/04/2017 20:20

Was there a reason bubbins

When coffee shops are popping up everywhere these days that you chose the one that had no facilities

Floggingmolly · 18/04/2017 20:21

I've never encountered a function room without facilities either. Strange.

dontbesillyhenry · 18/04/2017 20:21

It's not 'mean' to think it's uncouth and unhygienic. But yes it's not AS bad in an empty room where food isn't being served or eaten by others

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BellMcEnd · 18/04/2017 20:21

Filth. Totally agree with fairytale's post.

I have 3 DCs and I've never done this. It would never have occurred to me, actually. I'll never forget a friend who gaily changed her baby's poonami nappy on my kitchen table no mat, no asking first (the answer would have been NO). I was too gobsmacked to say anything. The Flash was deployed.......

Baby or not, shit and wee is still shit and wee and I'm about the least germophobic person out there.

dontbesillyhenry · 18/04/2017 20:22

What would you say changing a dirty nappy in a coffee shop is then Tess?

TessTube · 18/04/2017 20:23

I have flogging.

And cafes with nothing but a toilet & basin with no room to put a baby anywhere.

I've used my lap but it was frankly a bit dangerous, a pram is a better bet.

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