about changing a nappy on a cafe table?

[Catsize]

So, I usually grab something quick and cheap for lunch but decided to treat myself to a nice baked spud in an art gallery cafe.

Half way through said spud, and perusing MN, I looked up to see that the people on the table nearby were changing a baby's nappy on the table where they'd just eaten.

My face must have been a bit of a picture because one of the women looked at me as if to say 'what?'. Feeling I had to justify myself, I said 'it's just that it's a bit grim changing a baby's nappy on a cafe table'.

The woman doing the changing asked if I was a mum. Instead of saying 'what difference would that make?', I said I had two children. She said she didn't realise I was watching(?). I said it was more of a hygiene thing, but yes, it had put me off my lunch somewhat.

She replied that it was 'only a bit of wee'.

So, was I being unreasonable hygiene thing and it is 'only a bit of wee', or is this utterly grim?

For clarity, this was in an area out of sight of the staff and I was the only other customer in that area.

The loos were ten paces away, full changing facilities and pristine.

[TheDowagerCuntess]

[Blueskyonthehorizon]

Yep, here it is
www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-4429508/Mother-sparks-debate-nappy-changing-caf.html

[TheBadgersMadeMeDoIt]

Before I had my DD, I remember seeing a mother changing her baby on a picnic table. I was faintly nauseated at the thought of the next people coming along and eating their lunch there unawares. There was a perfectly good changing table in a toilet block nearby, and I was just considering telling her so when a seagull flew over and comprehensively spray-painted the table between us. Any comment I was going to make on grounds of hygiene seemed pretty pointless after that.

(For the record I'm still not a fan of public changing and managed to avoid it with DD. But I'm not so judgy about outdoor tables any more.)

[dontbesillyhenry]

I'm sure if there are no actual toilets in the building there would have been some toilet facilities nearby. Or was it also a coffee shop in the middle of nowhere

[MommaGee]

Erm bubbins you missed the sarcasm... Hence my comment about lack odd empathy. And the whole second paragraph.

[MommaGee]

There is no baby change at my local doctors so the options are on the dirty disabled loo with the risk of incurring wrath for abusing the disabled loo or a chair in an empty medical room. Not seen anyone do it in reception yet but tbh it would serve them right

[Bubbinsmakesthree]

Sorry Momma I misread your post

dontbesilly it was an area of London with mostly boutique-style shops and notuch else and I was there as the shops were closing for the day (I was there for a friend's art exhibition opening later on - bit ambitious with a small baby but you live and learn). There really wasn't much else in the area. If I'd put him back in the sling to go hunting for toilets the nappy would have likely leaked over both of us and have had an hour on public transport to get home.

I'm not saying it's not a bit grim, but in the same situation again I'd still have changed the nappy in the coffee shop.

[MommaGee]

No worry bubbins

[bluebelltippytoes]

That's disgusting.

Last year on holiday in Cornwall whilst we were queuing for an ice cream at a beach cafe, some women sat her bare bummed toddler on the cafe serving hatch. I was .

Do people have no shame?!

[Catsize]

👋 Daily Mail, sorry for the typos...

[SuperFlyHigh]

Bubbins in your situation there will be a pub or more pubs nearby etc if you'd have asked them they'd let you change in there so your bleating about area etc still doesn't wash with me.

[MommaGee]

superfly she didn't say there weren't other things...
. If I'd put him back in the sling to go hunting for toilets the nappy would have likely leaked over both of us and have had an hour on public transport to get home

Not sure them both sitting on a bus stinking of boo is preferable to a quick bum change

[Dizzy2009]

There isn't any point in arguing with SuperFlyHigh, she'll just continue repeating that there will have been another option and bubbins was gross, no question.
I do think you could have asked to use the staff toilet though.
Regardless, I think this is a case of lesson learned, next time she won't go to a cafe without toilet facilities. All of us mums have been there, had babies poo at the most awkward moment possible.

[MommaGee]

Well I chsnged ds standing up in the park so I'm in no position to comment anyway lol

[Floggingmolly]

...she'll just keep repeating that there will have been another option

I do think you could have asked to use the staff toilet though
Well quite, Dizzy... There's your "other option" (to changing a shitty nappy in the vicinity of people eating, right there
There's always another option.

[Dizzy2009]

I suppose she might not have been thinking clearly, though, sounds like she was pretty stressed, unlike the mum the op was talking about who didn't care. Benefit of hindsight and all that.

I would have wanted to try and get rid of the poo in the toilet, though, apart from anything else. I wouldn't want it all in my nappy bag, yuck! You can usually get rid of most of it down the toilet.

[SuperFlyHigh]

Well I'm back. Sorry I agree with my views, if you're organised enough to bring a baby out for the day/night with a change of nappies etc you can use a smartphone to look for other places to go or YES ask to use the staff toilet.

Having said that about nappies leaking I am slightly sympathetic but again if you're in London very easy to find a pub within 5 minutes walking distance (no smartphone needed!) to change a baby even when a cafe closes.

I just felt the potentially leaking (it hadn't done yet) nappy is an excuse, which it is.

I have had to use toilets in emergencies in the past and managed fine so if i can do it...

[SuperFlyHigh]

Dizzy and of course yes, Bubbins was so stressed she had mummy brain, forgot how to use her smart phone and instead opted for the easiest option of changing a nappy (wasn't it a pooey one too?!) on a cafe table. And presumed because she was in a booth it'd be ok. She also lost control of her mouth to be able to ask staff to use their toilets.

[Bubbinsmakesthree]

Didn't even occur to me that there would be a staff toilet.

I'll be honest - I don't actually find small baby milky poo smell offensive so that probably colours my judgement. I think it smells like fudge.

If it had been toddler poo it's a different matter

[MommaGee]

Some people are perfect parents who are always prepared for every eventually and calmly think through every action.

Some people are human. They agree to meet in the kind of café they used to frequent and figure baby can have a wee nappy change at x o'clock when it works well. Then they do a poo, a stinky one. The sort where as soon as you peer in to see if its a poo not a pump it tries to make an escape. Oh crap now what. No loo's here, if I pick you up your going to leak on me aren't you? Yup. Ok, you're screaming cost you hate poo and I can't really move. Ill hide you under the table and just whip it off. No one will notice and hopefully if they do they'll understand I'm new to this. Ok nappy changed, poo wrapped up, thank god for antibacterial gel! You safe to move now?? Good. Next time we're meeting at bloody Starbucks and be damned their tax issues!

It's not the same as changing a toddler on a table whilst staring at the baby cjange

[Dizzy2009]

Bubbins didn't change the nappy on the table, SuperFlyHigh, she changed it on the bench, which isn't so bad. As it was a poo, it would have smelled, that's the issue really.
You're confusing her with that mum who the op spoke about who definitely was gross.

[Floggingmolly]

Sorry, Bubbins, but to everyone else, it smells like... shit.

[TheCountessofFitzdotterel]

Quite right MommaGee.
Sometimes as a parent you have to pick the least bad option rather than the perfect one.
But you will be judged by someone whichever you pick

[MrsKoala]

Not everyone Flogging. 2yo's shit smell like adult shit definitely, but unweaned baby poo smells different. Not exactly nice, but certainly not like 'shit'. To me it smells like salad cream (which i hate) sort of sweet and sour.

[TheCountessofFitzdotterel]

Smells more yoghurty to me. Agree you can't generalise.