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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this woman is an arsehole?

184 replies

parkQlsss · 16/04/2017 23:31

Hubby was in a fender bender a few days ago. He rear ended a woman in stop-and-go traffic VERY slowly. She got out screaming at him, even after he apologized and admitted fault... Hubby's truck had no damage and her car had basically none, just a few scratches on the bumper. Anyway, they exchanged insurance information but did not call the police. Now she is claiming that her car has over £1500 in damage and she has neck pain! Her car had almost zero damage, and I can't believe a few scratches would cost £1500 to fix. And she is claiming that she is going to miss work for her "neck pain" from a tiny bump, even after she immediately jumped out and started screaming at my husband! AIBU to think that she is being an arsehole and taking advantage of us?

OP posts:
insancerre · 18/04/2017 17:54

46
Look at the title of the thread

Moreisnnogedag · 18/04/2017 18:00

Honestly Op why do you care? A claim is a claim from your husbands point of view. It matters not a jot whether she gets £200 or £2000 to his insurance premiums.

FWIW new cars are designed to crumple so even low speed impacts can cause substantially more damage than you'd expect, especially when the thing impacting them is a pickup. I have hit a car pulling into a parking spot, I was inching along but the whole front bumper was dented in on the other car (my car had nothing - how unfair is that!).

QueenofPentacles · 18/04/2017 18:03

Your husband went into another car.
End of.
He is totally at fault.
Your insurance will pay.
I wasn't there but people are bonkers aggressive.
Best not be aggressive too,
I hope you have legal cover.

DaisyBernardMimiTinker · 18/04/2017 18:06

Don't hate me... but I'm pretty sure it has been proven that under 5mph rear end shunts can not physically cause whiplash... sadly we live in a sad world where as soon as someone bumps someone else they get "whiplash" from the incident!

I have been rear ended 3 times in 3 different vehicles, once at 20wks preggo and have never suffered whiplash or claimed for damage (because there wasn't any) I hope that if I ever go in the back of someone, karma will be on my side and the other person won't instantly claim whiplash and/ or thousands in repair work.

I also know that car garages massively over inflate the cost of repairs if they suspect it is an insurance job.

I'm sure I'm not the only one to have heard about repairs been quoted at thousands but if repaired privately costing a fifth of the initial quote.

I massively believe that the ridiculous insurance prices of vehicles is to do with garages inflating costs and people claiming for personal injury, so personally I am very opposed to the claim culture (obviously there are exceptions to this rule, with genuine accidents and genuine people)

Fingers crossed you get it sorted, although I suspect not judging by the woman's behaviour.

SecretsInSpitalfield · 18/04/2017 18:10

Op she's taking the P out of you and DH. You know she is. A few scratches shouldn't cost £1500.. and as for her 'hurt neck' 🙄 Unfortunately I think you're going to have to bite the bullet annoying I know.

ThreeLeggedHaggis · 18/04/2017 18:14

I'm not a believer in whiplash

Do you choose which other injuries to believe in? Hmm I got whiplash from the same accident that threw me against the seat belt with enough force to cause this. Both injuries were very real and very unpleasant.

To think this woman is an arsehole?
AlexRose5 · 18/04/2017 18:15

Hoping you got pics of the initial damage OP.
This person is being unscrupulous , I've had a crash (my fault in paper but morally she was in the wrong for the move she pulled to cause the crash) where a woman was fine at the scene then got speaking to some personal injury road man that encouraged her to go for injury and loss of earnings etc.... long story short it's nearly a year ago and we've been told a witness she called has given contradicting crash circumstances to her version so her whole claim is being disputed .
Far too much of this claim culture about these days. People tryna milk things to death . Hope you get it resolved OP Flowers

daffodil10 · 18/04/2017 18:22

I can't believe this thread is still going. It doesn't matter whether she's taking the piss or not, has whiplash or not or how much the repairs are. Your insurers will decide and your opinion means nothing. As the policyholder you pay the premium and your insurers hAndle the claim. As it was a rear end shunt strict liability applies there is no case to be questioned

SoupDragon · 18/04/2017 18:28

This person is being unscrupulous

Do you have magic vision that enables you to tell this?

ToughItOut · 18/04/2017 19:03

Were you in the car too? If not you only have your dh version of events. Let the insurance decide

AlexRose5 · 18/04/2017 19:08

Soupdragon do any of us have magic vision when reading these threads? Hmm
The OP is taken at face value, and if you'd read it, you'd see it states there was hardly anything wrong with the car and it was hit at a crawling pace. Based on what the OP states you'd done NEED a magic freakin mirror to know it's a typical case of "milk it for all it's worth" ...
Or maybe I have it wrong ? Can you tell me how much research you would personally do into the facts of a post before voicing an opinion ? Do you show up at the location with a forensic team ?... Please, don't reply too fast ... I'm taking notes .... 🙄

Jaimx86 · 18/04/2017 19:12

I was rear ended at (guesstimate) less than 5 mph. I barely felt the jolt and had no pain other than being shaken, but my car was written off! I think it's really had to see the damage on initial inspection.

kateryan · 18/04/2017 19:16

I would certainly let the insurance deal with it. They are very savvy as are doctors at spotting true whiplash and other injuries. Yes her car may have high costs, however, your insurance company may well ask for their recommended repairers to look at it. The vehicle damage is always a good clue to injury sustained and again insurers have experts in this field. My hubby had an accident years ago where a schoolboy who was fine (and continued to have full school attendance) claimed for loss of his paper-round earnings for a 6 month period. What he and his parents didn't know was we had friends who's child attended the same school who confirmed that the boy was still doing his paper round and was bragging in school that he and his father were going to be minted as a result of the accident. Shame was the father thought his 15 year vehicle was going to be replaced by a new one. Insurance investigated and threatened them with police and fraud, in the end they got nothing. I know not everyone acts this way and there are genuine accidents and claims. Please don't be intimidated by her threats or actions. On the positive your hubby is ok and sounds like so is she.

SoupDragon · 18/04/2017 19:18

Soupdragon do any of us have magic vision when reading these threads? Hmm

Lots of you do apparently, given how many agree that the woman is clearly an arsehole, a chancer and absolutely trying to defraud the insurance company.

RiverTamFan · 18/04/2017 19:29

Sincerely hope you have photos! I'very been on both ends with two separate accidents at about 15-20 miles an hour. First one another driver tried to get into my Lane and the side of her car hit the side of mine. No real damage to the car. 2 people in her car, 5 in mine and I was the only one injured bexcuse I was the only one who had a preexisting bad back. Her carelessness made my condition worse, her insurance paid out.
Second was a fender bender. Back corner of mine and front of hers. Pushy cow. I had a small dent. The problem was she claimed a huge laundry list of issues about a week later. Massive damage to her car and list of medical problems gorgeous her, up to and including sexually dysfunction! What did the Insurance Company say? "But she's a Police Officer!" Her story had massive holes in it (like her horrific injuries not stopping her working until weeks later) but the Insurance rolled over for her and I nearly didn't get my car insured at all at renewal time because of the over £20,000 award she got!

So it could be real, let your insurance deal with it but keep an eye on them too, just in case they decide to throw you DH to the wolves.

AlexRose5 · 18/04/2017 20:10

Enlighten us then soup dragon . When somebody posts an AIBU thread, and gives their version for opinion , should we be magically go to the other person and get their side of events, or should we treat it for what it is = A question on MN based on one set of facts by an anonymous person we will most likely never encounter other than to give opinions or advice regarding whatever the OP stated ?
If the OP is taken on face value then this woman is a flippin chancer and there are plenty of them about , so it's hardly beyond the realms of reality that the OP conrains genuine facts .
Take a seat Soupdragon

Cantstopeatingchocolate · 18/04/2017 20:31

You're upset and I understand why. But it's an insurance problem, if you protect your no claims it won't even affect your premiums.
Think yourself lucky it's so low. My DM had an accident (totally her fault and she admitted it), it was a dent and a scratch to the other car and nothing on hers. Less than 5mph driving into a parking space. Other woman wasn't even in the car. Fast forward to this year when she was renewing her insurance, changed companies, they asked if the claim had been resolved, she asked her old insurance company if it had. Was told, yes all fully resolved, other person was paid out £10k!!!!
She was Shock and asked why, was told it was probably due to personal injury claim. She said 'but No-one was in the car' he said he wasn't sure but that amount normally meant personal injury.
She was like you, angry and a bit 'cheeky mare'!!! Until I reminded her it doesn't matter, that's what she pays her insurance for and if THEY didn't follow up properly or ask the right questions, it was nothing to do with her.

SoupDragon · 18/04/2017 21:13

Enlighten us then soup dragon

I'm sorry, I don't seem to be able to type slow enough for you to understand.

BunsyGirl · 18/04/2017 21:16

Three years ago I had a very minor accident when a car drove into the back of me at a roundabout. I am currently sat with a hot water bottle on my neck/shoulder trying to relieve the severe pain caused by an injury that I sustained in that bump. Even very minor accidents can cause a lot of damage!

Summer888 · 18/04/2017 21:31

Let the insurance companies deal with it, but she could be telling the truth. I have had my life ruined by someone who drove into the back of my car 4 years ago. I was stationary at red traffic light, they weren't driving fast. I have been in permanent pain ever since from whiplash in one shoulder. The whiplash didn't appear until the next day. Bumper damage is crazily expensive and £1500 sounds within reason. She was probably screaming & angry as she had had a fright.

AlexRose5 · 18/04/2017 22:33

Aww poor Soupdragon ... This the only place you can get attention lol

dontbesillyhenry · 18/04/2017 22:38

I have a disc prolapse in my neck- if I got shunted it would no doubt cause major problems for me as it has in the past. It would be far worse than a bit of minor women's whiplash (hope someone gets the reference)

SoupDragon · 18/04/2017 22:44

You're just making yourself look foolish, Alexrose5

SoupDragon · 18/04/2017 22:50

Anyway, I shall leave you to use your super special magic powers to make statements of fact based on a second hand telling of an event you did not witness and which had many people have said is not necessarily any sort of fraud whatsoever.

Enjoy!

mumto2two · 18/04/2017 22:50

Regardless of blame here, it was an accident, and from an insurance claim perspective, the facts are key.
While I do agree, genuine whiplash injuries can indeed be troublesome, I do feel there are far more chancers, than real victims. In the heat of the moment, the potential for gain does not feature. Fast forward a few hours, and it strangely often does.