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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Dogs left at home alone?

78 replies

BlueBlueSkies · 12/04/2017 17:34

The kids really want a dog. They have been nagging me for years. As we are all out from 7.30am to 3.30pm Monday to Friday, I feel that is too long to leave a dog alone. I think it is cruel to leave dogs alone. Kids think iabu. Am I?

DH and I both had dogs as kids, as know how lovely they are. But both our mothers were at home all day, so the dogs had company.

I see lots of posters here mention dogs. What do you do? How long do you leave your dogs? Do you have someone to come in each day? Are there breeds that don't mind being on their own?

OP posts:

Wolfiefan · 12/04/2017 17:36

You can't leave a dog that long. What about needing a wee!
You can't have a puppy and leave it either.
You could use a dog walker or doggy daycare but obviously that has cost implications.
Some breeds are better than others at being left. A collie would go nuts but an older greyhound would just be glad of a sofa!

Justmadeperfectflapjacks · 12/04/2017 17:37

I doubt you will get much support for getting a dog in your circumstances. .
Even with a lunch time dog walker that's a bloody long day.
Ask the dc if they would be happy home alone all day. .

CaptainMarvelDanvers · 12/04/2017 17:38

Yeah it's too long if it's everyday, it's 8 hours. I would ask your kids if they could hold their bladder for at least 8 hours everyday.

LaGattaNera · 12/04/2017 17:38

I think that is too long to be honest - I don't leave my dog more than 4 hours. My greyhounds were pretty laid back about being left but even so, that's 8 hours and they may well want a wee and/or poo within that time and if crated, may not have access to water during that time.

Trifleorbust · 12/04/2017 17:39

I wouldn't. It's not fair on the animal.

ElphabaTheGreen · 12/04/2017 17:43

Going against the grain here...my dogs are by themselves from 7:30am until we get home after 5pm. They do have each other and they have free access to our large back garden and a sectioned-off part of the house. This is the arrangement I've had with virtually all dogs I've had over 30 years. Never a problem. They are small, self-exercising dogs, though (dachshunds). Probably wouldn't do it with bigger dogs.

Brighteyes27 · 12/04/2017 17:45

That's definitely too long to leave a dog on its own all day. We have a fab dog walker she takes ours out for between 2.5 to 3.5 hours a day. She picks several
Dogs up and takes them all out together for a decent run walk and then drops them home. I only work pt and she charges £10 per day for this so it adds up. Our dog is very sociable loves this and dog walker and is shattered when we get home. We are usually out between 8.30-4. She has him when we are away in holiday as well.

Cherrysoup · 12/04/2017 17:45

Lone dog, absolutely no way. It's totally unfair on the dog.

Floralnomad · 12/04/2017 17:45

You say your children want a dog , if you didn't have children would you and your husband actually want a dog as it's you that will be responsible for it . That said your current circumstances are not suitable without daycare / walkers .

Brighteyes27 · 12/04/2017 17:46

Yeah ours is a big dog depends where you live if they have access to a garden/run it's ok but depends where you live breed/nature of dog etc.

Wolfiefan · 12/04/2017 17:47

How about volunteering with the cinnamon trust?

AHedgehogCanNeverBeBuggered · 12/04/2017 17:48

Not ok to leave a dog alone that long, even with a lunchtime walk. There'll no doubt be someone along soon who will claim their dog is perfectly happy, but honestly it's cruel - dogs are social animals, it's really not on to leave them alone for long periods.

Justmuddlingalong · 12/04/2017 17:48

I'll just ask my NDN's dog what she thinks. Ooops, no reply. She appears to have lost her voice, due to barking and howling since 8.15 this morning.

SheSaidHeSaid · 12/04/2017 17:48

That's too long to leave a dog. When we had to leave ours for that long we had someone come in to walk him in the middle of the day but I felt so guilty that I made sure it on your happened once in a blue moon.

SheSaidHeSaid · 12/04/2017 17:49

It only happened*

Bloody iPhone

CreatingADream · 12/04/2017 17:49

borrow my doggy may be an option for you to get your kids to spend some time with dogs without committing to having one.

AHedgehogCanNeverBeBuggered · 12/04/2017 17:49

NB if you have tons of outdoor space you could get two provided they had access?

Renaissance2017 · 12/04/2017 17:49

We've done it at various times (always lurchers and terriers), but you have to give the dogs a bloody good walk in the morning (it used to be 5 miles for ours) and another few miles in the evening.

Just remember...... the kids won't volunteer to do it in the winter!

ThreeLeggedHaggis · 12/04/2017 17:49

Not okay. It isn't just about having exercise space and somewhere to pee - it's about company. Even if there are multiple dogs, it's unsettling for them to have part of their family out of the house for so long each day.

chosenone · 12/04/2017 17:50

We got an 'easyish' small dog (cavachon) and still don't leave her for more than 3 hours! We waited until my dad was fully retired so he has her for the middle part of the day and exercises her. We also have a professional dog walker at least once a week who takes her for 2.5 hours.

Original poster

BlueBlueSkies · 12/04/2017 17:53

TBH if the kids did not want a dog we would not get one. I would rather a cat, but one of the Dc is allergic.

As you have all said it is too long to leave a dog alone. Which I what I have been saying for years. Though I am being told that I am unfair and all their friends have dogs. Most of those I know have one of the parents working at home.

We won't be getting one.

OP posts:

sophr2017 · 12/04/2017 18:01

Blueblue, why don't you sign up to BorrowMyDoggy as a walker, would be great for the kids if they love dogs! We want a dog but are in the same situation with hours so me and DH walk someone else's dogs at the weekend and occasionally during the week if they are busy and it's a perfect compromise!

kmc1111 · 12/04/2017 18:04

It's too long for one dog. Fine if you had a well-suited pair who had no separation anxiety issues (you can often find bonded pairs at shelters and pounds). They'd need either an unlocked doggy door or a nice sheltered space in the backyard if locked outside.

I leave my dogs 8 hours a day, 5 days a week. It's no problem at all. Each time I've gotten a new dog I've eased them into it by taking some holiday time and then used nanny cam type things to keep an eye on them at work. They've all been perfectly fine and happy and keep themselves and each other entertained. My greyhound is especially great, she just sleeps and acts as a cushion for the others when they decide to sleep.

I walk them for an hour in the morning and DH walks them for an hour at night. They have free run of the backyard all day. If they didn't have the daily walks I'd have to get a dog walker in daily.

So it's definitely possible, but you'd have to really research and wait for the right dogs and then be really committed to walking and playing with them after work.

Wolfiefan · 12/04/2017 18:07

If you don't want one then don't get one. They are a massive tie, expensive and take up loads of time. The kids won't be walking in January and picking up poo.
Cinnamon Trust could really be a great compromise. Walk as much or little as you like.

LadyPW · 12/04/2017 18:10

If they have outdoor access it just means they can sit outside and bark until the neighbours are going up the walls (old neighbour did this)

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