Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be annoyed at driving 91 mph on a 70 mph road.

322 replies

Jupitertomars · 09/04/2017 12:56

On a 70mph road with myself in the back as 7 month of DD was crying so 5 year old is in the front.

I was furious. OH rolls eyes when I shout "wow!! Slow down! Your going 91 mph!!"

Then give him death stare.

He replies "stop looking at me like that. I'm not going to crash."

It makes me so frustrated as he just doesn't take it serious.

I know it's common to go slightly over the speed limit but this was too far for me. It's really annoyed me but I don't want it to ruin our day out.

OP posts:
IfYouGoDownToTheWoodsToday · 09/04/2017 16:03

Titty

What an appropriate user name.

khajiit13 · 09/04/2017 16:03

The "I'm not going to crash" attitude is infuriating. Going at excessive speeds will take other drivers by surprise too, potentially causing them to make mistakes. It's not all about you. And if you're going at 90mph and get in to an accident, regardless of weather or not you consider it your fault (which you would be at least partly to blame for speeding) then you and the kids in your car are fucked. Speed can turn the average accident into a fatal accident.

TittyGolightly · 09/04/2017 16:04

So you stick to 20mph then? Everywhere?

Or do you just walk?

Papafran · 09/04/2017 16:04

Cool, Titty, I hope you get caught and hopefully have your licence taken away eventually. If you are addicted to speed, go to a race track where you can drive safely and not risk other people's lives. You have made no comment on the fact that the country you have cited as a perfect example in fact has a significantly higher death rate on the roads than the UK, suggesting that the speed limit does impact on safety. I hope you never have to be in the position to see a loved one killed or seriously injured, just because some dumb idiot who thinks s/he is invincible wants to get to his/her destination 30 minutes early.

TittyGolightly · 09/04/2017 16:05

I'm still looking into the crash stats. Sorry for being thorough. Hmm

NotYoda · 09/04/2017 16:05

khaliit

Well, according to some people, that's just their bad for not being as awesome as the fast drivers and not having spidey senses and roll cages.

Papafran · 09/04/2017 16:06

Titty

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_traffic-related_death_rate

The sources are in the footnotes in the bottom. HTH.

khajiit13 · 09/04/2017 16:07

Titty, how do you know it's empty at 2am?

araiwa · 09/04/2017 16:09

"Titty, how do you know it's empty at 2am?"

because youre not allowed to drive if youre blind so presumably the driver can see if other vehicles on the road Hmm

animalsAreDelicious · 09/04/2017 16:10

haha - Louise Hamilton Smile

@Andrewofgg

No, I meant that inappropriate speed kills. Meant what I said and said what I meant.* I would rather drive at 85 on a quiet dry motorway than try to get to 60 on the lane near my house. The latter would be legal but nigh on impossible (I have a stock M6, no rally car for me, sadly) and really fucking dangerous.

I think the current system where the police turn a blind eye to 80-ish in the right conditions is fair. If they increased the limit oto 8- then they'd either turn a blind eye to 90 or pull over 1/3 of the people on the motorways.

Remember, stopping distances were created based on a ford anglia, not a 2015 sports coupe with 285mm wide run flat tyres and ceramic brakes.

*I spent ages wondering if I'd spelt 'inappropriate' incorrectly

chitofftheshovel · 09/04/2017 16:22

OP, if you felt uncomfortable your partner should have respected that, I've felt unsafe being driven before but it was more to do with their aggressive driving technique, being too close to other drivers being the main one.

I have nodded with every point titty has made, it's about reading the lay of the road, looking ahead, being totally aware and observing the three lane rule. Distance between travelling cars is way more important than speed.

ZilphasHatpin · 09/04/2017 16:31

The speed isn't the dangerous bit - it's the other drivers!)

Indeed, you are a perfect example of that.

HappCatt · 09/04/2017 16:32

I'm tempted to speed when I drive late at night and there are no other cars around and the visibility and weather etc are good. . In most modern cars 70 doesn't feel that fast.

I don't because I don't won't to get points or banned and even if you are a brilliant driver stuff can still have and I don't think I'm important enough to warrant those extra few minutes I might shave off my journey by speeding. I imagine that Titty must be ^very* important and special Wink Hmm

HappCatt · 09/04/2017 16:37

Distance between travelling cars is way more important than speed

I don't know if distance is more important than speed exactly but I'm constantly shocked at how close cars will drive behind one another on the motorway. It's bonkers and REALLY dangerous.

I'm also shocked at how some people aren't aware as to what's behind them. I check my rear view mirror constantly even on the motorway. Judging on the number of idiots who don't seem to see emergency vehicles racing up behind them there are plenty that never check. Pillock's 😱

akkakk · 09/04/2017 16:45

There are some really illogical and silly arguments on this thread...

Speed doesn't kill - if it did every plane would land with lots of dead bodies on board Grin, astronauts wouldn't do very well and as for those involved with land speed records like Bloodhound, I suspect they must surely drop dead every time they think about it!

As has been accurately stated above, inappropriate speed can kill (yet rarely does) - and that could as easily be 25mph in a 30 limit past a school as 90 on a clear motorway... In fact I know of an accident where a pedestrian ran across a double carriageway into a car - the car driver was being cautious doing 25mph in a 50mph zone - had they been going at 50mph there would have been no accident!

So the speed that kills is not a reflection of whether it is above or below the speed limit - but whether it was the wrong speed for that situation. It is also worth noting that when you look at accident stats there are a number of influencing factors causing accidents (tiredness / incompetence / alcohol / drugs / anger / human mistakes / wildlife / road conditions / mechanical condition of the car / the speed at which the car was travelling). Excess speed (all accidents involve speed of some level!) is actually a small % of being the main / sole reason for the accident... just the easiest to measure.

Speed limits were originally set based on road shape / dynamics, and car capabilities - both of which have changed a lot in intervening years... speed limits today are as often set by political forces as for any other reason - e.g. a road near me - long long open straight road, with no turnings / no driveways / no houses / no trees or hedges blocking the view - couldn't be a safer road, yet for some reason it has recently be changed to 50mph from 60mph - no logic, no change in circumstances, just political change... The road hasn't suddenly become less safe - so it must logically be as safe to do 60mph there as it was 6 months ago - yet now it would be illegal - so for those arguing that illegal = unsafe, sorry, that logic fails

As with some of the others on here, I have done considerable amounts of advanced driving / and coaching or tuition - to a high level, as a result, my ability to physically handle a car, and observationally handle the setting is far better than previously - as a result I probably drive faster than most, but equally I drive slower than most - also, the more I learn, the more I realise how much I have to learn - as a result my caution and humility on the road increases - not decreases... the arrogant drivers are usually the bad drivers... one of the big differences between those who have done advanced driving and those who have not is the differentiation in their driving - matching speed to appropriateness...

I see this all the time in the countryside around here, just today I was in a NSL (60mph) single-carriageway road behind another car - and approaching a group of cyclists - I had come up behind the other car as I was driving faster than they were, but I held back seeing the situation ahead... They didn't slow down - but overtook the cyclists on a blind right-hand bend, luckily nothing coming the other way or it could have been a terrible accident... by this time I was doing under 20mph in case they crashed, I stayed at that speed several car lengths behind the cyclists around two bends until the road opened up enough for me to overtake them safely with a good margin... A few minutes later I had caught the other car and seeing a safe opportunity I passed it... So a good example of how I was driving both faster and slower than they were - and as a result much much safer driving. Yet I suspect that the driver of that car, like many on here has swallowed the mantra that speed kills - and probably believes that their 45mph was far safer than my higher speed - totally unaware that they nearly killed a bunch of 6 cyclists...

There is a real danger in just taking on board political slogans and believing them - indeed living by them without understanding the reality is a very risky approach to life - I am fortunate to know some of the best drivers in the country and what distinguishes them all is the intelligence of their drive - yes I would agree that someone just getting in a car and always driving at 90mph in a 70 limit without thought is increasing risk - but that risk comes from the lack of thought, not the speed per se - I have several cars I drive regularly, ranging from a 150bhp diesel to a 400bhp car with a race based engine and race brakes, and from 2 seater sports car to a classic 4x4 - the intelligence comes in adapting to car / weather / setting / etc. - how I drive each is different.

so lets ditch the spurious argument that speed kills - it doesn't and science clearly shows that it doesn't... however bad driving - yes, that kills regularly, so lets focus on bad driving - and lets be aware of what that is: tiredness / emotions / fractious passengers / lack of observation / poor mechanical skills / poor mechanical condition of the vehicle / arrogance / drink & drugs / etc. - these are the things that cause accidents - so the more we can do to reduce those the better... We have very high standards of driving in this country, but can always do better - the three main things which would improve this are:

  • good mechanical condition of the car (it is amazing how many people don't check lights / tyres / oil / etc.)
  • good observational skills - this is what advanced driving is about, think of it as chess on the roads - understanding and anticipating every other road user - and being ready for their move before they make it - anticipating and protecting yourself and them...
  • good personal condition - making sure that as a driver we are relaxed and alert, not tired and grumpy :) - not always easy, but makes a huge difference...

but speed - nope that actually isn't one of the biggest issues - just the easiest to measure and therefore has become a generally inappropriate target

akkakk · 09/04/2017 16:52

and to add separately as it is a slightly different point...

back to the OP - one of the signs of an advanced and capable driver is that they make their passengers feel happy :) so however good a driver and however safe the speed, the choice was perhaps inappropriate.

However it is interesting to note how passengers react, and it is seldom to the speed value in isolation - so the reaction is usually to:

  • overly violent acceleration
  • aggressive tailgating
  • harsh braking
  • poor mechanical sympathy (e.g. hitting potholes)
  • bad weight management (how the car is set up in the corners)
  • lack of observation (close misses with others)
  • lack of sympathy for other road users (e.g. too-close an overtake on a cyclist etc.)

it is rarely the speed itself - but with a bad driver the speed magnifies these things, so where there can be tolerance at lower speeds, that tolerance from the passenger goes... I know drivers who could take the OP up a country road at 120mph so smoothly she would think they were doing 60mph - but they are few and far between - so if the OP's OH can't do that then slowing down is a courtesy to the OP if nothing else... They might not die at 90mph but they might well divorce due to a lack of respect!

coconuttella · 09/04/2017 17:10

90mph is more dangerous than 70mph.... but 70mph is more dangerous than 50mph... there's nothing magic about 70mph that makes the safe, and I think it's fair to assume if we reduced the speed limit to 50mph the number of fatalities would fall further. 70 mph is just the legal speed limit set many years ago that was judged to be reasonable.

I would much rather drive with someone who has sound judgement and assesses risk carefully, but who speeds in certain circumstances, than someone who believes there is something intrinsically special about speed limits and believes that simply by slavishly sticking to them they will be safe.

OP... The argument you instigated with your DP is probably more dangerous than him doing 91mph, despite one being illegal and one being legal.

ShiroiKoibito · 09/04/2017 17:10

Judging on the number of idiots who don't seem to see emergency vehicles racing up behind them there are plenty that never check. Pillock's

this with bells on!!

HappCatt · 09/04/2017 17:15

Speed doesn't kill. TBF it's usually rapidly becoming stationary that does it Confused.

Jupitertomars · 09/04/2017 17:20

My phone ran out of battery so just getting back to this.

We're now on the way home & happy to report much safer driving.

We were on a motorway but it was also busy so I'd consider it inappropriate and therefore unsafe.

We weren't even in a rush, just a relaxing day out so I didn't see the need.

Also he's already been on the speed awareness course so think he should really know better.

And its also his total lack of acknowledgement of the potential consequences- "I won't crash", I'm pretty sure no one sets out in the morning thinking "I'm going to crash today".

OP posts:
Willyoujustbequiet · 09/04/2017 17:21

Tit by name.....Hmm

WaitrosePigeon · 09/04/2017 17:23

It won't be long until you're caught.

BoomBoomsCousin · 09/04/2017 17:24

Going at 90 doesn't necessarily add a lot to the likelihood of crashing, and depending on the circumstances may not be more dangerous than driving with a screaming baby in a car or many other things that lots of people do. It obviously increases risk because a driver can't prevent every accident just by being a good driver and speed increases the severity of outcome, this is true for any increase in speed whether it's over the limit or not, but we have limits as part of the contract between drivers and other road users to balance risk and convenience. Also, there are lots of reasons for speed limits other than the risk of the driver crashing.

But despite all that, shouting at someone who's driving isn't a good idea.

somewhereovertherain · 09/04/2017 17:32

Well I've driven at a 155 mph legally on a road in the British isles

The 70mph motorway speed limit is so out of date it's untrue. But also the 60 on a lot of county roads is too high - would also help to ban tourists and townies from country lanes - they don't seem to understand how wide their cars are.

akkakk · 09/04/2017 17:34

And its also his total lack of acknowledgement of the potential consequences- "I won't crash", I'm pretty sure no one sets out in the morning thinking "I'm going to crash today".

This is far more of an issue than the speed per se - as per above - attitude and arrogance is more likely to cause accidents than the precise speed...