Do I drink too much?

[user1491413344]

I drink a bottle of wine every night. DH says this is too much and thinks I should stop.

Is it too much? Thought it was okay.

I drink one bottle over a whole weekend (one glass Friday, one Saturday etc). I prefer low alcohol, if I had a whole bottle of 12% in one go I'd be unconscious. Sometimes I can go a fortnight without alcohol.

The fact that without it you are snappy and unreasonable, and you need a whole bottle every night because you can't unwind without it, shows that certainly, even if you don't have a drinking problem now, you're well on your way to one.

Start cutting down and finding other things to take its place. Maybe try fruit juice (or a soft drink you like) in a wine glass. Sometimes it's psychological (like someone trying to quit smoking who needs to find something else to do with their hands ).

I drink one bottle over a whole weekend (one glass Friday, one Saturday etc). I prefer low alcohol, if I had a whole bottle of 12% in one go I'd be unconscious. Sometimes I can go a fortnight without alcohol.

The fact that without it you are snappy and unreasonable, and you need a whole bottle every night because you can't unwind without it, shows that certainly, even if you don't have a drinking problem now, you're well on your way to one.

Start cutting down and finding other things to take its place. Maybe try fruit juice (or a soft drink you like) in a wine glass. Sometimes it's psychological (like someone trying to quit smoking who needs to find something else to do with their hands ).

I uave recebntly cut down the amount I drink. A thread on here about lady drinking in the ipark, and my response to her later got me re assessing my drinking habits. It was a wake up call for sure. I drank far too much and I drank for the wrong reasons. This is what I did to change it. I started to buy those mini bottles. One mini bottle of really nice wine. Then I had that. I savoured it. I would hve it in the bath or with my favourite book or when I spoke to my best friend. I savoured it (rather than gulping down pino grigeo). Then I started to do something else for one night a week (kick boxing) so I didnt drink the mini bottle. Then I gradually reduced it further. I now buy one or two mini bottles a week. Some weeks not even that. I feel so much better.

Fucking Hell is there really the need for s the unpleasantness in some of these replies?? What do you gain from that?

Would it help to look at the figures? So we're 95 days in to this year. If your average bottle of wine is sat £7.50, you've spent £713.50 so far this year alone on wine. Assuming of course that there's only one bottle every night - I'd imagine there are nights where you drink a bit more than that?

OP

I had a boyfriend who died of liver failure. He "only" drank what you are drinking a night. He had done that for ten years, and I think was also an undignosed diabetic. He died at 36.

My Dad is 68 and is a diabetic alcoholic. They are trying to save his toes. He has drunk a bottle of wine a night followed by a nightcap for about twenty years.

This is the reality of long term heavy drinking and is thr sort of scenatio you could face down the line.

If you were with either my bf or my dad, you wouldnt think they were madd pissheads, either of them.

A bottle a night is a lot but unfortunately I don't think it's that uncommon.

Please do try to cut down, you will feel loads better.

OP there are a lot of judgemental people on this thread.

I'm drinking too much at the moment. I can drink a bottle of wine, or the equivalent every night. It's easy and is entirely due to this year so far being completely shit for various reasons - including a mother dying recently of a cancer strongly associated with alcoholism. Oh the irony. I don't smoke, I don't take drugs and I'm not a sugar fan, so alcohol is my crutch and it is a very socially acceptable crutch.

I'm trying to get back to a normal level of consumption (for me not for anyone who is a virtual teetotaller!), but know that I can't do it instantly - not because I'm addicted, but because I'm so fucking stressed I don't know what to do with myself. I've started by having one day a week where I don't drink. That's working fine so far (a few weeks so don't get too excited). I aim for two nights, but that might take some time. Eventually I hope to get back to just drinking at weekends like I used to - but that's a bit far in the future at the moment.

You do need to cut down, you know that, but you don't have to do it immediately and all at once. Just one drink at a time. Or maybe swap a whole bottle of wine with maybe a bottle of beer or cider a couple nights a week (that's what I have done). You'll get there in the end. Good luck.

Hiya, GPs can help with signposting towards local services that might not necessarily big as big and scary as alcoholics support, for instance the change for life scheme can offer advice about if you're drinking too much and cutting down on alcohol consumption as well as other healthy lifestyle advice, our town have a local office at the leisure centre where you can see someone with a professional health background and they go through everything with you and give you a plan for first steps. There may be lots of local services to you that the go can tell you about.

I'm glad you found the courage to ask, OP. I drink nearly every night. It might only be a glass, sometimes, but it sometimes knocks me for six. I drink because I lost my husband two years ago and I'm so lonely. I have wonderful adult children, but my soul mate is gone. Everyone thinks I'm doing well because I have my own business, close family support and no money worries, but I still drink because I'm miserable.

Can you say why you drink? I know you say you get grumpy, but you didn't get up one day and decide you were going to drink. You've had a drink because you were sad, and it helped. You had a drink the next night and it helped again. You're now at the point that you 'need' it, but what was the trigger? I know I sound like a hypocrite, but it might help if you talked.

I used to be judgemental, like some of the posters on here. I never thought I'd be in this position, as I had 'will power'. I'm 48 and have went from being a super healthy vegan, that spent over 25yrs eating good food and loving exercise, to a fat vegan who drinks too much. Be careful how and who you judge as it can come back to bite you on the arse.

I'm not a sugar fan

You know wine = sugar right?!

My husband was drinking a similar amount a few years ago. I was breastfeeding so not touching a drop and our social life was zero, and it was easy to keep tabs on him, I just used to write the number of units per week on the calendar when I took the recycling out every week. Aside from telling him I was doing it, I never said anything else, but it was a massive wake up call. He is still a heavy drinker but has a massive glass of water at the start of the evening as it's easy to confuse thirst with the need for a drink. Although wine is his usual he switch to low alcohol beer, (M&S do some good ones) so he still has alcohol just less, he then found it was easier to cut down from there. He still drinks loads andoften starts at 11am on Saturdays but it's better than it was. I barely drink so that helps. Good luck OP.

I'm in a similar position so I feel for you. It doesn't make you an alcoholic as previous posters have said but it isn't healthy.

It does make you an alcoholic. If a person is necking a bottle of wine a night, they have a problem with alcohol.

You are exactly the same as the person you see in a park drinking wine out of a brown paper bag.
The only difference between you and the 'stereotype'' is you don't hide yours in the bag.

I suggest people read this, it's really good. I wasn't drinking a bottle a night, but had got into the habit of over indulging on the weekend.

www.amazon.com/This-Naked-Mind-Discover-Happiness-ebook/dp/B016JP45PU?tag=mumsnetforum-21

Sorry OP, based on what you've said you are probably alcoholic. If you want to change I suggest you try AA and your Gp for support.

Don't be mean? This is aibu and you are.

Are you drunk now? You sound it.

Does nobody else on hrere drink every night?

Er no.
You sound like you're dependant on it, maybe physically, but definitely psychologically.
If this hasn't been going on for too long your liver will probably be fine.

Yes, you are an alcoholic. I don't drink much (maybe one G&T when out, a couple of times a year) but I struggle massively with binge eating and am 2.5 stone overweight (previously three stone heavier).

Most people have something that they struggle with so I'm not judging. Go to the GP for help.

brickinitIam:

No call for that sort of comment. Why not be kind?

OP you're getting a hard time here. Yes it's a lot, far more than the guidelines, but it's the fact you don't know how to relax without it that rings alarm bells for me.

How is your sleep? Do you wake up in the middle of the night?

You might find that you are in a loop: alcohol leads to poor quality sleep, which leads to stress, so you use alcohol to relax. Which leads to poor sleep, and so round you go again.

I would suggest you take a look at the brave babes threads and the dry threads on here ( in relationships); everyone is very supportive and will give you help to cut down, or stop completely if that's what you need to do.

Good luck

There is a lot of tolerance for 'mummy wine o'clock' in recent years to tell us it's relaxing.

It shocks me how many FB friends with young children are into mummy wine o'clock. They brag about it.
What happens if they're called on to pick their child up from a club, or they have to make a trip to A & E, or a friend can't drop their child back from a playdate and asks them to.

I can understand a parent drinking on the weekend. Parents have to have time off and relax, but every night during the week?
It seems to be a thing now.

I think this is fairly common at particular points in many people's lives and doesn't necessarily indicate addiction or health problems and certainly no one can know whether it's affecting your liver.

I agree with previous posters that the thing to do first is cut down. If you can't do this, or your anxiety is unmanageable then your GP could help but I wouldn't see them until you've tried.

There isn't a magic answer to this, it just is about reducing your intake. Give it a few weeks and you might be totally sorted out and have a new lease of life!

It's too much OP. The reason being that in a while (be that weeks or months), it will turn to......a bottle and a glass, a bottle and a bit, a bottle and a half. A year later, two bottles.

OP there are a lot of judgemental people on this thread

No there aren't. There are a lot of people who don't drink as much as the OP, yes. There are a lot of people who think the OP drinks too kuchen and has a problem, yes. That doesn't make them judgemental.

Ironic that the person who said there were lots of judgey people is the one that also drinks a bottle of wine a night.

brickinitIam:
No call for that sort of comment. Why not be kind?

If the OP is drinking a bottle of wine a night and it is now night,time
she will more than likely be drunk.
What's wrong with asking the obvious?
Dressing things up and saying that the OP isn't an alcoholic isn't doing her any favors.
The one line, incomplete sentence sounds like something I would have typed when 'under the influence'.

OP can you switch to a lower alcohol wine for now?
Then maybe try to make one bottle last 2 nights
Then 3 nights
Then maybe after you've finished a bottle have a night off?

In the mean time try to explore other ways to relax -
A bubble bath
Reading
Colouring
Knitting/sewing/crocheting
Crosswords/wordsearches
Going for a walk
Yoga
Swimming
Jigsaw puzzles
Painting

Also finding an alternative comforting drink would help
Tea (there are a million different flavours)
Hot chocolate
Milkshakes
There are lots of fancy sparkling juice drinks around too that I discovered when I was pregnant, feels more special than just orange juice or lemonade, I used to drink them out of a wine glass too

But definitely speak to your GP, it does sound like you're an alcoholic if you can't manage without a drink
good luck