To think these women are arseholes?

[Flypaperforarseholes]

Spent the weekend away with a group of women (most of whom I don't know) for a friend's birthday.
10 of us in total, 2 of whom (including the Laura, whose birthday we were celebrating) I have been friends with for 10+ years.
Shared a twin with Nora, on Sunday morning, before going to breakfast, we packed ready to check out. I then stripped the beds and collected the used towels together.
We went down for breakfast and Laura laughingly asked if I'd stripped the beds yet. It is a bit of a standing joke amongst us because it's something I've always done in hotels. One of the other women, Paula, asked what it was about and I explained. She was quite taken aback and asked why I felt the need to do it/don't I like to relax etc. She drew it to the attention of the whole group and took to calling me Mrs Mop for the rest of the day. A bit irritating but didn't bother me really.
This evening, a message from Paula came up in the watsapp group which had been set up at the planning stage of the trip.
"Thank you for a lovely weekend, girls. Laura, do give me flypaperforarseholes number, good help is so hard to come by these days. LOL!"
A few laughter emojis and "LOL"'s from some of the other women. Nothing from Paula or Nora yet.
Am I BU to think these women are arseholes?! It hasn't bothered me massively, in large part due to the fact that I found Paula a pretentious bore of a woman and thus give a minimum of fucks about what she thinks of me but I'm surprised that this such a small thing seems to have become quite the focal point for her. I'm assuming she doesn't realise I'm on the group chat because I haven't actually messaged on it. These women are school mum friends of Lauras and I don't want her to get caught in the middle so haven't replied...yet.

It is a bit wrong, to do something for someone 'as a little favour' when it's their job. It's patronising. If you appreciate their efforts, leave a tip.

Would you strip a hospital bed after vacating it or wipe down the doctor's couch after hopping off, or check your car's fluid levels so the mechanic didn't have to at its service? It would be interfering with someone's work to do that.

But a chambermaid or waitress would just be glad that someone was kind to her?

Read this thread maybe flypaper has a point and we should all start stripping hotel beds to avoid it.

I conclude that unfunny Paula is the least weird person in this situation.

Stripping the bed and cleaning people's plates would be very strange/unrelaxing/uncomfortable to me.

I'd rather shit in my hands and clap than spend thousands on a fucking handbag. Mwah. What the hell?!

she's a feisty little fecker when she's got the bit between her teeth CRINGE!

Laura and OP have got no chill and chip on their shoulders

Haven't rtft but I strip beds down too and I stack plates. Why?
Because I have been a chambermaid and when clientele fellow weirdos used to do it for me, I appreciated the token: it was one less bed to do.
I was glad that someone was being kind as opposed to leaving used porn mags, condoms or vomit.
Stacking plates is a habit I have tried to break. Only because my DP pointed out that the waiters' way of carrying/stacking, you know the posh way kind of all up their arm, was fundamentally different to my Kerplunk pile up Greek Wedding about to happen.
I do ensure tables, floor are pristine after my kids have Bugsy Malloned them: that's good manners/ensuring Eating With Kids is a repeat event rather than lifetime ban.

I worked for a couple of Summers as a chambermaid when a student. Given the very odd practices that people get up to in hotels stripping the beds is not even a blip on the radar. Someone had either turned into a werewolf mid-shower or smuggled a large dog into their room and stored it in the bathroom.

I also worked washing up for a few Summers. People scraping the plates and piling them up is an absolute PITA. Instead of having to rinse or scrape one side of the plate I had to do both sides as they always piled them up on top of food debris on the plates below. They also mixed up napkins, food, and cutlery which made it harder to sort in the kitchen. One lad got around this problem by just chucking everything in the bin except the plates. After two weeks his subterfuge came to light when there wasn't enough cutlery to lay up for wedding reception and he was fired.

My feelings on the plate stacking is as an ex waitress.

I didnt appreciate it because yes, it makes both sides of the plate dirty and greasy and is a PITA. I prefer to stack them a different way so while you are doing a favour to servers who do it like you do, you are not doing them all a favour. Where I used to work we all had our preferred way of doing it, so for that reason I think that you should stop doing it. There is a middle way between "leaving crap all over the table" and your way!

Stripping beds...when I worked in a hotel we only had one guest do this. It was the escort that was a regular, the sheets were usually in a rare state when she had been there but the one time she stripped them, she left them in the bath to soak as they were covered in shit. Tbh although I can see her logic, we rather wished she hadnt bothered as instead of binning shit stained sheets, we had to manhandle and bin wet shit stained sheets!

See Jackelope I used to put all the used cutlery separately in the large pint glass. I have now read most of the thread and have realized, what a shock said no one ever, I am common. Great thread though OP, it will run and run like U versus Non-U.
I also like the cut of your jib and your friend sounds awesome.

Oh God, Kipperbang, don't remind me of trainspotting sheets, I'm trying to eat I wonder how many hotels think I am an escort

Once she got to know us, was a little local place, she was quite open about entertaining clients. She was a lovely woman, great tipper, and clearly made a fair whack judging by her clothes and top of the range car. Mind you, I would want some serious fucking cash for doing whatever the hell made those stains :o

and some serious fucking cash too :o

I do hope the plate stackers will now stop as everyone who has waited has said what a PITA it is! As for putting all the cutlery in a pint glass...

It's bad enough at Christmas when rellies stack plates swimming in gravy and having to rinse them off! But I undulge them because I'm related to them

Good lord! Dirty cutlery in a glass has offended my sensibilities!

Question for all you bed strippers and plate/cutlery stackers - how did you come up with this? Was it something taught to you by your parents or someone else, or did you start doing it under your own steam? I ask because I'm curious, as these aren't things that I've seen or have ever occurred to me.

We're not there to assist domestic staff. We're there for a break. When I am at work, I expect to work, just as they do. It's nice when people help at my work (and i am in a public facing role) but it is not expected .

No one is expecting you to or suggesting you should. It is my choice to strip beds in a hotel, just as it is your choice not to. You say that it's nice when people help at your work, well why can't stripping a bed just be a nice thing that some people do? It's not a judgement on those that don't.

There seems to be a tone to OP's posts that she's been a waitress, been a chambermaid so she has some sort of inverted superiority about her. Only she knows what it's like to do these jobs because she's down with the workers and the ones taking the piss were snobs who had no idea
That's what you have taken from the post - I would suggest this is due to your own issues. I don't expect anyone else to do it, I don't ask anyone else to do it, so I have no idea why anyone would have much of an opinion at all on it. I certainly don't have an opinion on anyone not stripping a hotel bed so find it odd that so many seem to feel so strongly about it.
I only mentioned the fact that I have been a waitress and chambermaid in order to explain why I choose to do those things - because I found it helpful. I don't think the fact that I've done those jobs makes me better or worse than anyone else. To suggest that I do speaks if you, not me

Why do people pretend that doing something as cringeworthy as doing the chambermaids job for her is normal hotel guest behaviour?
Perhaps some of us don't find the act of stripping a hotel bed "cringeworthy".
We all find different things cringeworthy. For example, the idea of a grown adult thinking stripping a hotel bed is "cringeworthy" and marks someone out as "not knowing how to behave" makes me cringe because it reeks of snobbery.

But you did say that Paula was a snob and maybe she is but you jumped to the conclusion that this was behind her attitude and , spea king as someone who some might call working class, I find.it a tad unusual too and it's not coming from.snobbery for me so it might not necessation be from Paula.

Chiefly:

I don't like people tidying around me in a 'relaxing environment. ' To me, it's like someone grabbing your coffee cup before you've finished your drink. Not necessary. I also don't like tidy tidy people. I am tidy but I don't have a need to do it in an environment where people genwrally don't. It smacks of someone who can't sit still and relax and makes me.feel tense to be around people like that.

It makes me feel vaguely uncomfortable in a 'let's help the staff sort of thing'. People do feel pressured to follow suit. You say you didn't expect your room mate to strip the bed. If that's the case, one bed made is not that helpful and, of course, it's likely she felt that, if one bed was done, she had to do hers. What was the point on having one bed stripped? I think.you may as well have left it.

Finally, it's not a question of 'issues', which over medicalises. it's down to.personality differences which is par for the course when you meet friends of friends. You kind of learn to blend in til you know people a bit.

Anyway, the point has been a bit laboured but you did ask. I really wouldn't be overly bothered in real life with a bed stripper (ooh er). I'd probably think.them pernickety and uptight and not my type. Just as I'd think PaUla loud and opininated and not my type

NavyAndWhite No, I wasn't concerned with whether Paula understood why I do it, she asked, I answered. That would have been the end if it had she not continued to labour the point throughout that day and the next and had other members of the party not approached Laura regarding other remarks that were made over the weekend.
"And tbf you have said much worse about her than she has said about you"
Have I? Where? I would think that would be pretty hard to judge as none of us know what she actually said about me. Unless you are a member of our party and thus know what was said?
Gandalf456 I didn't jump to that conclusion, her behaviour led me to the conclusion that she is overly concerned with status and possessions, in my opinion. As I've repeatedly said, I stripped both beds as I was sharing with someone I have been friends with for 10+ years and have travelled frequently with so she is used to, and completely unfazed by, me doing this.
I didn't ask what anyone thinks of me stripping hotel beds, I asked if I was BU to think that calling someone Mrs Mop and referring to them as possible "help" is an arsehole-y thing to do.

In answer to the last question, she was a bit of a twat for taking it too far and bitchy for sniggering like a schoolgirl on group chat. I probably would have ignored it , had it been me but then, i'm a bit old for this kind of mentality now and it would have just got an eyeroll and departure from the group. You're unlikely to see her much anyway .

However, it would be partly due to what she thought of bed stripping that led to that so what we think is hugely relevant and, from what I've read, it's fairly mixed anyway and you are bound to get differing opinions on a page 20 thread!

You do not do the work of hotel or restaurant staff for them. You are being ridiculous if you do. Anecdotal evidence aside, the staff WILL be judging you and will probably be most amused by your understanding of etiquette.

It is not the norm.

I just know that my friends would have teased me in the same manner because we pull no punches! And as it is an idiosyncrasy, I would have sucked it up.

I have a clean bean friend. She is so tidy it's a tad OTT. I tease her occasionally and we laugh about it. I call her Cinderella as she's always mopping and sweeping. I am such a punctual person (worse than that really, I'm always early) and she calls it my helicopter moments. (Not anything to do with being a helicopter parent but on a big holiday once, I had a meltdown about being late and possibly missing a helicopter trip.) We both can't help our odd little ways and take the teasing. We also refer to our own funny ways in a self deprecating way. Do you do that?

I appreciate it's something you can't help doing but in doing so, you have to take the teasing in my book. Your friend sending that text was way out of line.

To be fair I wouldn't judge. I might be worried about finding a surprise lurking beneath though

I agree . Sometimes we will tease one another though I would be careful with someone I'd just met

user I'm not concerned with whether it is "the norm" or whether "the staff" will be amused by my understanding of etiquette. It's not like I'm shitting on the dinner table. How's that for etiquette?

Wow. Impressive.

Rousette it is something I receive good natured teasing for from friends and I join in with that.
Paula doesn't know me so I don't think it was appropriate and I wasn't at all sure it was good natured on her part at the time but didn't make it an issue. Finding out that other comments had been made behind my back rather confirmed it not to be friendly.
I totally disagree with your opinion on the text, it made me laugh, as it did the other members of the group aside from Paula and her chums