To post a note through the door of the house we are trying to buy in the hope of persuading the vendor to sell it to us?

[feelinginthedark]

My sister and her husband did this when they were buying their house in London and I am tempted to try. Essentially we are in a bidding war; neck and neck with another party; we are both in equally good purchasing positions. We desperately want the house, and can afford to keep bidding, but the price is getting to the point where the house will no longer be good value (it needs work). The asking price has been well exceeded at this stage.

We feel that a note might make a difference to the vendor's decision because DH and I are essentially good people, from the area originally but have moved our family around annually internationally for years in order to train in our respective fields (in our work we both help people a LOT- don't want to say what we do as it's totally outing), and would love to give our two girls the chance to settle in a lovely house, down the road from their cousins and grandparents, before our eldest starts school in September.

Would that info in any way swing your decision if you were the vendor? Or is it borderline psychotic / unethical?

I was always marginally less angry about it when people went via our realtor. The few people who put stuff through our door/on the porch, and trespassed to do so really took the fucking biscuit, and were then given a warning via the realtor not to trespass again. Such an invasion of privacy

Best offer doesn't always win. We chose an offer by a couple who we knew in the community when we sold, over higher offer by an investment buyer.

I did wonder if I was being silly at the time - but I had this feeling. I knew the couple wanted the house to retire to, and I just felt they weren't going to do us over.

Which was proved right in fact - because the credit crunch of 2008 happened a couple of weeks later, and the EA told me that ours was the only house sale that hadn't either fallen through, or been told they wanted 20k off the price.

Sorry it's a loooooonnnnggg thread. Did you decide to post the note? I'm on tenterhooks now!

'Essentially good people' !?
Creepy and offputting (and a ridiculous statement, suggesting others are bad people)

It may help - we were in a bidding war against a developer 6 years ago in a London borough and he tried to gazump us . The vendor said to the agent that he would rather sell to a family as it had been his parents house for 50 years and he didn't want it developed ! We were surprised and so was the estate agent who almost spat out the fact that he would sell at our originally agreed price and not take the increased offer ! It maybe worth letting them know your are a family looking to settle - Good Luck

Try it. Plus you don't know if you really are in a bidding war at all...estate agents lie for bigger profits....i ended up paying 10k more in a "bidding war" organised by estate agents. I had no idea if the other bidders even existed, found somewhere else, wgere still interested etc

There are some right miserable buggers on here aren't there? Intrusion of privacy my arse.

Do you know the position of the vendors? We recently bought and our vendor had lived here for fifty years and brought her family up here, it was important to her that we had small kids and it was going to be a family home again. We built a good rapport with her and she every so often comes over for a cup of tea. When I sold our old house it was again important to us that the buyers were a good fit, our old neighbour is like a member of our family so it was vital we left her with someone nice! And we didn't want to be mucked about either, commitment was really important as our first set of buyers pulled out over nonsense a week before exchange. So if you write stating your position and that you're really committed to buy, that you promise not to muck them about (and mean it!) and that you'd be thrilled to have it as your family home it might swing it. But I think you need to try and suss out what their motivations are, is it money or more than that? Mine was commitment to the purchase so we took the lower offer because of that, might be that is the motivator for the vendors here.

Good luck!

All's fair in love and war. And property.

However it would be unlikely to sway someone from taking a higher bid from another buyer.

Are you definitely in a bidding war though? If it's this obvious you desperately want the house, then the EA might be gaming you to find your maximum.

Hi OP

You would not BU to write a note like that and give it to the owners.

At the end of the day, it sounds like they are going to be winners whichever buyer they go for- somebody is going to be paying well in excess of the asking price for their property!

It's not as if you are asking for a discount or whatever, as other posters seem to be intimating many pages ago.

It won't hurt to give them the extra information- at the end of the day, if you don't get the property at least you'll know that you tried everything!

Have to say, in my (limited) recent experience of the property market- it just comes to greed from the sellers, they will (in general) ultimately go with the higher offer.

Just as long as you keep it within budget/what you can afford.

Good luck!

all this talk of trespassing?! WTF?

Before you go higher & higher with the price- do you know for certain that there is another buyer?

Let us know if you did send the letter in the end!

I'm not sure if I'd like the note or feel like you were trying to guilt trip me into selling to you over another buyer .... at the end of the day I would just take the highest bid!

'Essentially good people' !?
Creepy and offputting (and a ridiculous statement, suggesting others are bad people)

Actually, I read the "essentially" as a qualifier of OP and husband's "goodness".
Not as a comment on other people.

Ie, they're kinda good (if you squint). But they've had their moments. To the point that OP couldn't in all conscience say they were flat out good without qualification.

She probably didn't mean it that way, but that's how I interpreted it.

Very - so home owner might have a third interpretation - if writing anything best sticking to provable facts of advantage to seller - love the property, keen to buy, cash ready, can move anytime etc...😇

I don't understand why people are so possessive of the properties they wish to sell on. If you are selling it surely you are looking at your next property and the changes you want to make to it? I would certainly feel sad if anyone wanted to change my house but that wouldn't sway me and neither would a note.

If I ever sell my house I will choose the highest bidder and would feel really annoyed about someone trying to emotionally black mail me into choosing them with a note. What if the seller walks out just as you're posting, that would be so awkward!

This reminds me of when people send you a sob story via eBay message when you are selling something via auction.

I politely replied saying thank you for the message, and feel free to bid up to that price if that is what you feel it is worth.

I won't sell something something below what it is worth due to a sob story, which may well be untrue.

I find the apparent assumption that everyone selling a house is in a mood to be just charmed by the new sellers a bit odd. The people we bought our house from were having to sell it because they were divorcing. I doubt they much wanted to hear about all the lovely family times we were going to have in it and what an awesome couple we were

We bought from family members who bought it as an investment before the crash and were desperate to claw back as much money as they could, they were enraged that we offered bellow their asking price (EA got and earful of expletives) but we were still the highest off they'ld had and they were in financial trouble (we know due to post that came to the address for ages afterwards)

Next door was a divorce

Otherside, couple died and their estranged son from overseas wanted his inheritance.

Nobody cared if the properties would be loved, they all wanted a fast uncomplicated exchange to the highest bidder they could find

@ muffin basket

We were very swayed by the back story of one family who made an offer on our last home. So much so, that we accepted their offer even though it was $15k less than the next one in line. Story was passed to us via agent, who was quite persuasive on their behalf. It felt right to select them, since it was first home for a young family with little kids, of an ethnicity ranked extremely low on the home ownership ladder in our area.
*
I wish I had not later learned the story was not quite as it had seemed, but oh well.*

Oh. My. God. Really? really? You gave up 15k to a sob story. Jeez, I always wondered why people ever bothered trying it on and now I know ... ouch!

I won't sell something something below what it is worth due to a sob story, which may well be untrue

I think the point here is that OP wishes to be the chosen buyer- sounds like they are in a bidding war and the vendor is going to get well over asking price.

My interpretation was that if both the OP and any other interested party both bid the highest, she is looking to try and sway the vendor with more information.

A property is only worth what somebody is prepared to pay for it- and in this case it sounds like there is lots of interest (allegedly- according to the EA)

thecatsabsentcojones but you don't need to have small children, or any children, to be a family.

OP, I don't think it's a good idea to send the note. It sounds so smug and pretentious. I have gotten notes through the door and find them pushy and obnoxious. They go straight in the shredder to be recycled.

Would you approach a stranger and ask them to give you £5? £50? £500? £5,000? So why is it ok in a house-buying scenario?

I think the problem is that some people forget that this is all real money that they are dealing with. House prices are so huge that it all becomes a bit Monopoly-like.

£10,000 that someone gives you as a discount is much more than that if you think of it in terms of taxed income. Or the hours you have to work to earn that money. Or in terms of the purchasing power they could get if they used it as a deposit for their next house. Or money that their child could use as a deposit in the future... Why would they give that £10,000 advantage to a complete stranger rather than their own child, or even a friend? If they want to do good with that £10,000 they could give it to a charity, or loan it to a social enterprise, or financing women's enterprises in developing countries or a million other things that don't involve giving it to total strangers.

I know it is entirely up to the owners but I hate the idea of them selecting who to sell to. I do think by law it should be highest bidder. I don't like the idea of "locals" being given precedence over someone who wants to move in to the area, for example. Or a certain profession like the OP being more worthy. I do fear that having a buyer profile could lead to discrimination.

This would annoy me and I wouldn't entertain it.

I'd probably think sneaky fuckers.