I need to write "cock piss surname" on someone's car. Where can I buy washable car paint today?

[DanDanDanDanDan]

Need it for tomorrow

Tia

He he. Do tell of the reaction.

Back of the net!!!

I say telescopic dampeners - I mean rigid stays.

I'd just like to mention Chocolate oranges are available from Rawlinsons.

I've got a hat hard on.

Not you, Lynn. Stay here. Get on the phone, pester Debenhams for free lamps, free lampshades, you know, whatever you can blag ’em.

They've rebadged it.

Oooh, let’s forget about all this! Do you want some cheese?

A-ha!

Best bits.

Technically, Lynne, your life isn't worth insuring.

Poor Lynne.

Just to let you know, I've popped out again. The webbing in my shorts has perished.

This thread is a scream!

It's not a cry for help.

Stop going on about Benjamin Netanyahu Lynn, you're never gonna meet him.

Do you like... owls?

The farmers keep big chickens in sheds.

Time now for ‘Alan’s Fact of the Day’: Most Cornflakes come from the USA.

This thread is GOLD

When are we getting a picture update???

cantseethewoods I know a cracking owl sanctuary.. how about it?

Come on, Lynn. These people are starting to annoy me. I’ll tell you something. They may have very nice Tudorette-style housing, but can they order an Irish coffee at 3am in the morning and get it delivered to their bedroom?

Magic! Loving it.

You can piss yourself laughing in your Buck Rogers toilet.

If your pelvic floor lets you get that far...

The Queen is dead.

Not literally.