To think that Mothers Day is just a way of confirming how under appreciated we actually are?

[Flumpernickel]

To all those having a shite day so far and feeling even more acutely that no one actually cares.

Some people take this Clinton Cards Peak Sales Day way too seriously. I find Mothers Day a bit cringe myself. I don't need my family to bow down to me and pay homage and give me breakfast in bed so I can boast about how #blessed I am on Facebook. I know they love me, we tell and show it to each other every day.

Can I wade in? 😄

I actually find mothers/Father's Day a massive pain in the arse.

Yes I'm a mum and my exh did the obligatory card/flowers because he HAS to. Cos my ds will feel bad if he doesn't.

I brought my ex mil a card and gift from my ds because I have to.

Ok we don't have to, but it's pretty shitty if you don't right??

Meh it's bollox. My dm passed when I was 16. I'm not going to get extra weepy because someone somewhere decided today was an extra special day.

Can't we just stick to birthdays? 😜

And stop filling up my Facebook feed with all your bragging gifts!

I got nothing from anyone for birthdays and Christmas either, I didn't post on them days. I guess today sucks on multiple levels for some of us as we don't have a Mum of sorts to shower with stuff and/or we've had losses too. In my case the children I've got have gone away on top of that. So I'm here by myself.

It is all over commercialised crap. Read the posts on MN. The angst this day causes. Ditto Xmas .
I don't need one day a year to make me feel special. I want to be appreciated every day.

So, who is in for lobbying the government for a referendum to decide on banning mothers day then?

TBF it would make life easier, I would also quite happily throw, fathers day, valentines day and stupid grandparents day under the bus too. I would quite like to keep christmas though!

OMG I have found my people

I don't need a Hallmark day to show my appreciation to others or have them for me. I've only just woken up as DH was up with the baby all night, but that happens every Sunday, not just this one. I felt appreciated yesterday when DS1 thanked me for our day out (just the two of us) and today he gave me a letter saying why he loves me. DH had written one by DS2 with the things I do with him. If when my children are older they are busy but still show their appreciation other days I really don't think I will care.

I am sorry that so many here are having a shit day. It might, however, be worth reflecting on whether today has just put how unappreciated you are all the time under a lens. If so it might be something you wish to think about for longer than today.
and to those who are under appreciated. Consider your next move.

My husband is usually kind, loving and thoughtful and makes a lovely effort on days like this and random times throughout the year.

So it was a shock to me today to find he has done fuck all. I don't know what he was thinking. The worst of it is he knew I would be hurt and he made an effort for his mum, which would be understandable if they actually got on. Their relationship is very poor but yet he got her something and me fuck all. It's not that I don't think he should get her anything but nice to know I didn't cross his mind.

I don't expect much, just help the younger kids pick up some flowers that's all. I am hurt and I don't care if it's a Clinton Card peak sale day, having your husband going to no effort at all for the first time in 11 years stings.

At least my 17 year old got me something he knew I would love.

Well I am having a fabulous mother's day involving sex and chocolate. And yes sex is totally appropriate; how else does anyone become a mother?

And yes it's another day for people who feel shitty /unappreciated/abused/trapped to feel extra shitty. A big nasty poke for those unable to have children. For some to mourn passed parents or mourn the parents they never had. A 'perceived' spotlight, or sticking the knife in.

For all the positive spin it's also pretty brutal.

I'm very meh but it's very hard for anyone to ignore it.

Ds is 14, he's still asleep and the first thing he will say is "what's for breakfast?"

Don't you take some responsibility for that? My teenage DS I raised to be independent.

Ethylred god I'm jealous. You enjoy!

I do think people are set up to fail with these 'holidays'.

Don't you take some responsibility for that? My teenage DS I raised to be independent. Hahaha. I am independent but still ask what's for breakfast! What is it with MN, seriously if a teen dares to ask anything of a parent the parent is immediately put down as a failure. It's ok to do things for your children, even when they are adults let alone teens.

I am having a great mothers day. Breakfast in bed, gifts, handmade cards, housework ban, surprise lunch venue to come, most things i dont get on other days of the year so I am feeling very appreciated and very happy.

Ethylred, you go girl!

Oh grapes. Sending love.

Thinking of you and your baby xxx

I'm in!

I lost both parents 8 years ago and facebook is full of reminders that I could do without.

Of my adult children (who I do appreciate all love me lots), one is in the military and unlikely to send a message, another has mental health issues and is unlikely to remember and my dss has lost his own mother around the same time I did so we are both careful not to dwell on mother's day., even though some years he has sent me a lovely message, we kind of 'don't' usually with respect to the nature of how the day makes us both feel.

Also now, my dh has lost his own mum just last year.

It always falls just after my mum's birthday which I can just about manage not to dwell on without this great public display of 'motherliness' right after. It just makes me feel sad when there was no need for me to feel sad. It's a trigger for sadness for me and others around me and I just wish it wasn't a thing. I actually feel like shit today.

Oh well, tomorrow is 'back to normal' day. [flowers} to OP and everyone else feeling down today.

If you are underappreciated that's an all year problem not just on mothers day. I'm a single parent to a ten year old. I don't have anyone to take her to the shops to get me something so she makes me a card each year. I know she appreciates me so mother's day is just like any other to me. Her friend stayed over last night so I've been up early making pancakes and hot chocolate for breakfast. Mother's day can be a nice thought but it puts too much pressure on people

I love how there's a thread about people feeling uncared for and unappreciated and people come on to talk about all the ways they're being made to feel like gold today.

grapes big hugs

I love how the OP starts a thread offering to those who are feeling shitty and some people come on to mention how loved and appreciated they feel today.

cross posted with Tommy