Do you ever feel physically drained after speaking to someone?

[Bukkaroo]

I don't know if IABU or not but after being around some people or chatting to them I feel physically drained and just can't wait to get them to stop talking because I feel like they're making me feel ill. I know that sounds over dramatic and wondered if anyone else has ever felt the same?

That's what I do to be honest the80s, after over 20 years of it I can't be bothered to try to follow. My sister is so lovely, but as my dad says, she says a lot but says nothing at the same time!

I have a friend like this. Sometimes I can't wait to get away as she just physically and emotionally drains me. She is always asking me to go on holiday with her and I have to keep making excuses as I would honestly end up killing her. I love her to bits but small doses...

Snap! She also talks at me and everything is about her and when she does 'listen' she gets it all wrong!

Two work colleagues suck the life out of me. Unfortunately they're the two I work with most.
One talks loudly in a constant stream of corporate speak and the other speaks sooo slooooowly I feel like stabbing myself while internally urging her to get a fucking move on and get to the point.

I need a new job.

Fassone, poor thing! Lots of sympathy here.
Im thinking of doing counselling for people of annoying reles and friends. All welcome.

I'm an introvert and need time to recharge but even more so after spending time with my mother in law. Unfortunately she lives 200 miles away so comes to stay and I find the whole thing very draining. She talks non-stop but it's never cheery fun chatter, she's always moaning about something or someone. And it's not as though she comes for a couple of days and then goes. She stays, goes to visit family in another part of the country and then uses us as a fucking hotel comes to stay another couple of days to break up the drive back to where she lives, so I get over the first stay and then a few days later she's back again and I'm back to square one.

She's due a visit soon.

Sister in law and her husband suck the will to live out of me too.

Sorry, haven't read the whole thread but just wanted to add, I've heard these kind of people before being referred to as 'psychic vampires.' Might be worth a Google?

AntiGrinch

That's exactly how I feel. I sometimes go down with a bug after spending extended amounts of time with this family member and I'm sure it's because they drain my immune system I can feel the energy draining from me in their company. Need to find a coping mechanism!

Corporate speak fass, even worse than drivel ! Poor thing

Many clients. They physically suck your life force. They're like dementors.

Some just make your heart sink the second you see them coming through the door.

I work with one of these two days a week. She used to reduce me to tears of frustration as she was so difficult to be around. She has improved with HRT patches but only marginally. I can't have a two way conversation with her as she talks at me and has zero interest in what I have to say. I have never met anyone so self centred and unaware.

She always wears migraine inducing perfume which I can smell in the hallway before even entering the room.

Why do these people get like this ? How do they get away with it?
Its beyond me.

My mother wears migraine inducing perfume too. Dd and I chose a more palatable perfume for her for Mother's Day. It may make her a little easier to smell. But her conversation will continue to be nauseating, self centred and draining. I struggle to look at her as her presence makes me so angry. I posted how horrible she is to me upthread.

I know with my sister because she is very sensitive, you can't even speak to her about it. If you try to, no matter how delicately, she will get defensive and cry. I always feel like the bad guy so I've given up, when really I'm just trying the help her as she struggles to form relationships, find work etc (in part because of her she speaks I think).

How she speaks*

Yes, my DM. Negative, critical, and talks endlessly about nothing. In detail.

Also a friend, who is very sweet and lovely, but cannot entertain the notion that others may not be like her, or agree with her. She is very clingy, and I have to steel myself to not give in to the pleading eyes and the 'I never see you' stuff. There's a reason, love.

My MIL. We get on but she mainly goes out when she has to and does suffer from depression, which isn't her fault of course. Most conversations revolve around hospital appointments, the dentist and people she knows from the past that i have never met. She actually has a heart of gold but after some calls i have a little lay down.

All the time! I can't do group chatting as it makes my stomach turn. It's such hard work. I pay such close attention their heads go tiny and I feel really dizzy. It's worse at job interviews etc as I'm desperately trying to focus on them and not keep blinking hoping their head gets bigger 😂

As much as I hate saying it, and they are lovely, my parents drain me. They're in a rut, quite happily though, and every time I see them or talk on the phone I feel like they're dragging me into it too, if that makes sense.

We visit and each visit follows the same pattern. Cup of tea and cake. A 'snack' (usually a family bag of crisps) follows a short while later. Not long after that coffee will be offered. The conversation is always the same too. Exactly the same. It's like bloody Groundhog Day.
We live locally and although I've had no good reason, I went two weeks without visiting which made me feel guilty but bloody hell, I needed a break from the monotony for my own sanity.

I read somewhere that if you're an introvert, people tire you and you need time to recover.

Yes, when I speak to sil, feel so drained after 5 minutes! So much moaning about money, how hard done to, husband, everything 😑

To whoever said it's an introvert thing... It's not an introvert thing!!! Everyone finds someone draining! Just as being annoyed by toddlers and tired after socializing isn't an introvert thing!!! Yes 'extroverts' like company, but some 'introverts' act like 'extroverts' are only happy if they're partying 24-7. We ALL like quiet time, and not to be talked at, and not to be followed around all day by noisy toddlers (see recent 'introvert' thread) Sorry rant over!

I think many posters have pointed out that it is a classic 'thing' that introverts do experience a lot. It's a pretty recognised feature of being an introvert, so no harm in saying so. I don't think anyone said that extroverts aren't allowed to experience it as well!

I think also it was done to try to help the OP, not to 'claim' that introverts are the only ones with some God-given right to a bit of quiet!

I meet so many people like this - total drainers, I do quite a bit of voluntary work and one of the things we do is to encourage 'lonely' people to get involved in our work but I can understand why they are lonely - I know that sounds cruel but the vast majority want to talk non stop about themselves, no real interest in the actual volunteering, just wanting some to 'off load' to. It's very sad, but also exhausting and I come home at night and just want to be totally alone and can't even bear normal social interaction with my DH and DC. .

I guess it's also why I like Mumsnet so much - you can engage in interesting topics but not have to listen endlessly and when you are bored you just switch off and no one is offended .

Rag, yep, when the thread derails or gets stale we can go off to another one!

Yes. One person in particular. It's damn hard work being in her company. I feel like my brains getting drilled. I'll never ever be able to work her out. She comes out with the most shocking bullshit and it leaves my mouth swinging.